- a EunKang fanfic
- from asianfanfics
WARNING: contains mature content
Chapter 1: Drained
It’s 4am. SungHoon couldn’t remember the last time he had a decent sleep. But this time he just wants to crash down and forget everything. It seems nothing’s going right…
“What the hell is wrong with me?” he thought.
So far everything from his scheduled show appearances to his recordings are on hold. He can’t seem to concentrate on them. He can’t even understand the songs they wanted him to sing so no emotion comes out during recordings.
Lying on his couch Sung Hoon was deeply lost in his thoughts that he didn’t even notice his phone ringing. Only on the third ring did he realize that he had a call and it was his agency’s CEO.
“Sunghoon~ah, were you sleeping?” asked CEO Lee.
“No, I was in the bathroom for a bit…” he denied. “Why?”
“Something bothering you? You’ve been a bit off your game lately.”
Sunghoon takes a long time answering. He doesn’t really know what is going on with him. He’s been working nonstop for 7 years debuting as the pretty boy ballad singer in 2010 and earning celebrity status within just a year. He’s the most sought after singer, product endorser and guest celebrity of various companies.
“Teppeunim, I think I need a vacation.”
It was the first time he suggested that. He realized he’s close to a burnout for he’s been working nonstop. To his surprise, his CEO agrees with him.
“Yes I think you do. And I think you deserve it. I was actually going to suggest you take things easy for a while. Anyway we’re going to be pretty busy with the debut of our first idol group so we have to prepare a lot for their promotions. This may be the only time you can have a decent rest after working so hard.”
“Yes. I actually realized when I saw you during recording today. You looked so tired and lost that it dawned on me how you never had a proper rest since debuting. Anyways, you can go anywhere you like. I’ll pay for your accommodations. Think of it as a gift for making the company proud.”
“Wow Teppeunim kamsahamnida!”
“You sound a lot brighter now.” said CEO Lee while chuckling. “If I had known I would have suggested it sooner”.
“Aaahm… well… I don’t want the suggestion to come from me.” said Sunghoon who had a smile on his face already.
“Where are you planning to go?”
After talking some more they finally hang up. Sunghoon suddenly felt like a weight has been lifted so he trudged to his room, washed and slept peacefully for the first time in years.
Chapter 2: Hawaii
The next day, Sunghoon called his manager and told him to make the necessary arrangements for his vacation. Of course his manager asked if he was going with him but Sunghoon was planning on a weeklong stay and he knew his manager couldn’t stay away from his family for that long so he decided not to go and just focus on making sure Sunghoon had everything he needed for Hawaii.
Meanwhile, Sunghoon was busy packing. Hawaii was number one on the list of places he wanted to go to. He’d always imagine what it was like to watch the waves crash down towards the shore while drinking cocktails on the beach. Now it’s finally coming true and Sunghoon could not contain his excitement.
It was Tuesday and Sunghoon was scheduled to leave tomorrow at 6am. It takes about 9 flying hours from South Korea to Hawaii so Sunghoon calculated he’d be in Hawaii at around 10-11am. With a light heart Sunghoon finished packing and slept early to prepare for his flight.
At 3am the next morning Sunghoon’s manager picked him up and drove him to the airport.
“It’s been a while since I’ve seen you this happy, Sunghoon-ah.” said Jin Hyuk, Sunghoon’s manager.
“I can’t help it Hyung,” replied Sunghoon, smiling. “This is my first real vacation in years! I’m totally going to enjoy this!”
“I thought you didn’t like the beach anymore. You said it reminds you of something.”
“That was a long time ago. Besides the beach is the main reason why I started singing… I wanted to remember that feeling again so I can go back to my game…” Sunghoon said, smiling even brighter.
Jinhyuk didn’t reply. He remembered the first time Sunghoon was supposed to perform in Jeju, Sunghoon was very much against it. He said he hates seeing the sea. It reminds him of someone who broke his promise. Hearing him now, he wonders if Sunghoon has gone past the memory, although Sunghoon never really told him the story. At last they arrived at the airport….
After checking in…
“Hoon-ah, call me if you have any problems ok?” Jinhyuk told him as they were waiting for the departure call.
“Of course Hyung. But don’t worry if I don’t call. That only means everything’s alright.” Sunghoon reassured him. He honestly didn’t think there would be any trouble as he was only going there to relax and enjoy.
“All passengers bound for Hawaii, please proceed to the boarding gates…” the airport intercom bleated out.
Jinhyuk said a few reminders to Sunghoon and after making sure that everything is in order, Sunghoon finally made his way to board the plane.
The fresh air that greeted Sunghoon upon disembarking was enough to put his mind at ease. He’s here. The place he could only dream of. It would have been better if he wasn’t alone, but fate had another plan and nothing worked out. Even so, he wanted to see the place where their dream could have been fulfilled.
“Hyung, I’m here. Wish you were too….” Sunghoon thought and breathed deeply….
Stepping out of the arrival area, Sunghoon hailed a taxi to take him to his hotel.
Staring outside the window, Sunghoon couldn’t help but remember 10 years ago when he was only 18. For how could he forget 10 years ago when his life was changed forever…
“I must be feeling sentimental being in Hawaii. I can’t help but think of him.” Sunghoon thought.
After a while they arrive at the hotel and Sunghoon makes his way inside to check-in.
Just then at the entrance….. Sunghoon could not believe his eyes. A familiar face, a face he knew so well. The familiar walk, that even from afar he could tell who it was…
Jiwon stood in front of him his expression a mix of emotions. Sunghoon didn’t know what part was disbelief, what part was surprise but the minute sparkle he saw in his eyes the moment they met was enough to tell Sunghoon that he’s happy seeing him.
“Hoonie… it’s been a while…”
Chapter 3 Part 1 of 2: The Past
Sunghoon stepped out of the boat upon docking. Jeju’s picturesque beauty lay before his very eyes but he wasn’t happy at all. It was not where he wanted to be.
At his age, kids would meet in the arcades or the malls, even date but Sunghoon was a trainee now and he needed to practice. The yearly evaluations were coming and those that pass will be allowed to debut… but here he was on this island….he somewhat felt stranded but he had no way out. His grandfather wanted every one of them to be there and although he was reluctant he couldn’t refuse the request, especially since it might be his grandfather’s last one.
Sunghoon’s grandfather owned a luxurious beach house in Jeju. When he was younger they would visit him every summer, but at the age of 15 Sunghoon started training to be a singer so he had missed out on their yearly summer vacation. This year should have been no exception but because his grandfather’s request seemed urgent, his parents asked his agency’s president to let him take time off.
“Sunghoon-ah, come help me with the bags.” Sunghoon’s father said.
“Yes Dad.” replied Sunghoon. He took 2 of the bags and loaded them to the trunk of the car waiting. He was lost in thought. If he couldn’t pass this year’s evaluation he’ll have to wait another year. On the other hand, he hasn’t been able to take proper rest after being a trainee. He then decided to just enjoy being here. It’s been 2 years anyway. He was still young he can make it on next year’s cut.
“Everything’s loaded Dad.”
“Good, we should get going. Your aunt just called me. Father’s not looking too well.” said his father.
Sunghoon only had fond memories of his grandpa. He was his grandpa’s favorite, not that that was a surprise. His aunt and his father are the only siblings, his aunt got married but never produced any offspring and Sunghoon is an only child so naturally he was the favorite grandson and his grandfather doted on him.
After a while they reached the house. Upon hearing of their arrival his aunt came running out to meet them, her face lined with worry.
“You can get the bags later Minjung,” said Aunt Miran to his father. “Let’s go upstairs first. Dad’s been asking for you. I….” she hesitated. “I don’t think he’ll last the night. “She said sadly, trying not to cry.
His father didn’t hesitate. “Sunghoon-ah, kajja.” And together they all trudged up to the second floor to his grandpa’s room.
The wheezing sound of the ventilator greeted them as they entered the room. For a moment Sunghoon couldn’t move. He always saw his grandfather full of life and laughter. In just a year after the cancer took over, his grandfather was nearly skin and bones. He hasn’t seen him in 2 years and the sight shocked him.
His father carefully sat beside the bed, holding his grandfather’s hand. Sunghoon could see his father trying to hold back tears and he didn’t realize his eyes were already moist too. His mom stood behind his father, her hand on his shoulder in an act of reassurance. Sunghoon slowly made his way towards the bed, his tears now slowly falling.
“Abeoji, we’re all here.” his Dad said.
His grandfather barely opened his eyes to look at them. Maybe he saw them for they could see a trace of a smile on his features. He couldn’t talk anymore so he gestured towards the desk adjacent to the bed. That was the time they saw letters addressed to each and every one of them.
“We’ll read it later.” said his Dad. His grandpa barely nodded but they perceived the action. He slowly closed his eyes…..
A week after his grandfather’s death Sunghoon still hasn’t read the letter. Not because he didn’t want to but because he wasn’t prepared to fully say goodbye yet.
Reading the letter means he’s accepted the fact that his grandpa’s gone.
Sunghoon snapped out of his reflecting. His dad came to find him in his favorite hangout, the beach. It was where he felt most peaceful and worry-free.
“Have you read Abeoji’s letter yet?”
Sunghoon let out a sigh. “I was planning on reading it later.”
“Are you okay now?”
Sunghoon looked at his father behind him. “I think so Dad, yeah…”
“Good… Because I’d have to introduce someone to you tomorrow. And you need to read the letter for you to understand.”
With that said, his father went back towards the house leaving Sunghoon wondering.
He honestly was not yet prepared to read but curiosity got the best of him. Later that night, Sunghoon sat in his bed holding the letter. After staring at it for minutes, he finally tore it open and read his grandfather’s last wishes…
My dearest Sunghoon,
For years I’ve been very happy that I was given the most handsome and sweet grandson. Every year I would anticipate summers for those were the only times I could spend with you and all those times were filled with inexplicable happiness.
Your sweet smile was enough to make all worries go away and I’m proud that your parents did not spoil you. You grew up to be the respectful and loving person I wanted you to be and for that I am extremely thankful.
But then 2 years ago, you decided to pursue your dream of becoming a singer. Being a trainee must be tough. You no longer can come even if you wanted to. I must say I was disappointed but I didn’t want to hinder your dream. I was happy that you’re following a goal and even if you were a trainee you still managed to keep up with your studies. There was no reason not to be proud of you. So I settled with telephone calls but your presence was what I missed the most.
Now do you remember when you were 7? We had a new neighbor. A family of three.
They rented the house at the end. You were specifically fond of playing with the child back then. You were only two years apart. That was the first time I saw you smile brightly than before. Jiwon must have been lonely too, for his parents told me that he talked nonstop about you when he’s at home. When you were together, you bonded and got along so well. You always told me you wish summer didn’t end. Sadly they had to leave after 3 years because his father was reassigned to Seoul. After that your smiles weren’t as bright and you refuse to play with other kids your age. Eventually, you too stopped coming.
Two years ago, Jiwon came back. He visited me upon his return. I learned that he requested his parents to buy the house they used to rent (his father was promoted to a higher position) and that he would make it his summer house. The first thing he asked about was you. You two must have been really close. He hasn’t forgotten.
He must have thought you still came by during summer. I told him you were busy with training and you rarely came by anymore. He smiled when I said that. He said you used to say it to him all the time. He’s happy you’re following your dream.
When I got ill, Jiwon would always come by and visit me and for that reason I treated him as an adopted grandson. Although your attitudes are polar opposites, I was happy to have a companion. It felt like having you here with me.
Now that I’m leaving, please do me a favor. You and Jiwon were as close as brothers. I hope you can rekindle that friendship. I want to see you smile brightly like before. Take good care of each other. Both of you are precious to me and all I want is both of you to be happy. I’m leaving this house in you and Jiwon’s name. You because you’re my only grandson. Jiwon because he took real good care of me while I was sick and comforted me every day. I already asked my children’s permission for it. I hope you’ll both take care of it.
Be happy and smile always. Saranghae Sunghoon-ah.
Sunghoon finished reading the letter in disbelief. One, he didn’t know Jiwon was back. Two, the house was in their name. For a second he was stunned but gradually he smiled. Jiwon was the one person in the world he loved hanging out with. If he’s back… Sunghoon smiled again. Looking at the letter, he said a silent prayer for his grandfather.
“Thank you, Grandpa.”
Chapter 3 Part 2 of 2: Together
Sunghoon’s mind went blank upon seeing Jiwon the next day. He hasn’t seen Jiwon in a long time, but every aspect of him was as vivid as yesterday in his mind. He hasn’t changed at all. A bit mature, yes, but maturity suits him well… Sunghoon remembers the dark brooding eyes that always light up whenever they meet and the perfect heart shaped lips that arched to a smile whenever they talked. His heart skipped a beat. He realized just how much he missed him. And before his mind could stop him, his feet moved of their volition, towards the one person he treasured the most.
Jiwon looked up from the living room in time to see a streak of blondish hair rushing down the stairs to greet him. Before he could even blink, Sunghoon wrapped his arms around him in a tight embrace and Jiwon was filled with an inexplicable warm feeling. He hugged Sunghoon back just as tightly. He breathed in the familiar scent, a scent he missed and his heart started beating faster. His bestfriend. His Sunghoon.
“Sunghoon-ah, it’s been so long… I really missed you…”
After a while Sunghoon broke off the embrace and immediately Jiwon felt hollow.
Somehow being that close to Sunghoon felt complete. He couldn’t understand it.
Sunghoon placed his hands on Jiwon’s shoulders and looked at him smiling. Jiwon missed that smile. Sunghoon, now with blond hair, seemed to shine even brighter in his eyes and Jiwon couldn’t help but smile back.
“Waaahh Hyung!!! You look absolutely the same!!”
“So do you, except for the hair. I see you had it dyed.” said Jiwon, chuckling.
This was why he liked Sunghoon. He always was cheerful while he was the opposite.
Jiwon felt Sunghoon was his sun. He fixed his eyes on Sunghoon’s face. He always wondered how such a guy could be so pretty it puts other women to shame.
Especially now with his blond hair, Sunghoon was flawless.
Sunghoon gestured for them to sit down, but he kept staring at Jiwon.
“Hyung, when did you get here? Have you been here long? How come I didn’t see you around?” asked Sunghoon in rapid succession.
“Woahhh, slow down.” Jiwon said. “I just got back from Seoul today…”
“Were you at the funeral?” Sunghoon got curious. If Jiwon was there why didn’t he see him?
“I was….” came the discreet reply.
“Then how come…”
“How come I didn’t show myself before you?” Jiwon cut him off and finished for him.
Actually Jiwon was worried. He really thought Sunghoon might have forgotten him.
After all 7 years is a long time. And Sunghoon is a total social butterfly. Who knows how many friends he had in Seoul. He couldn’t appear before and him and get embarrassed in return if that was the case. So he kept his distance and watched Sunghoon from afar. He wanted to comfort him during that time but all he could do was keep his distance. But seeing how Sunghoon reacted when he saw him, he was worried for nothing. He didn’t forget, and that more than made up his day.
“I thought you would have forgotten me.” he stated in an I-don’t-really-care attitude. “I was wrong though.” Jiwon smiled at him.
Sunghoon looked at Jiwon intently. “I promised not to do that didn’t I?”
“You did… Tch… You’re such a loyal brat.” Jiwon said while reaching out to ruffle Sunghoon’s hair.
“Ei, hyung!!!! Not the hair!!!”
“Aigoo, my Hoonie. Still so sensitive.” Jiwon didn’t stop though.
“Yah, I spend hours on this! Hajimayo hyung!”
“Just what do you do to your hair that you have to waste so much time?”
Sunghoon caught Jiwon’s hand and held it tightly. “Stop hyung. I’m not a kid anymore. Besides I’m a trainee remember? I have to take good care of myself if I want to debut.” He still wasn’t letting go of Jiwon’s hand partly because he doesn’t want his hair messed up again but mostly because Jiwon’s hand felt warm against his.
(Why am I getting this weird feeling?) Sunghoon thought.
“I think you don’t have to. You already look like an angel.” Jiwon blurted out.
Sunghoon’s breath got caught up in his throat. He didn’t understand himself. Girls back in Seoul nicknamed him Hoon-angel. But hearing it from Jiwon made his heart flutter. He brushed it aside.
“Hyung you should have told me you were back here. If I had known I would have come.” said Sunghoon changing the subject.
Jiwon looked at him and simply said “I’m not that important to make you choose between me and your dream. Besides I’m not always here. My parents get worried sick if I stay here too long so I go back and forth from here to Seoul.”
“Tsk, then we could have met up in Seoul hyung!”
Jiwon was about to tell him he didn’t have his number but he held back. “I didn’t want to disturb your training. Besides, you’re already here anyway. “(and that’s what matters) Jiwon added as an afterthought.
“Ai cham hyung I just remembered. Did my father tell you? Harabeoji left us this house.”
Jiwon was just about to bring the subject up. He wondered why he was included.
“So I heard. I couldn’t believe it though. Why include me? Why not your father or your aunt, why us?”
“My father couldn’t care less about this house he’s too busy with his job. My aunt too.”
“Then why include me? Why not just you?”
Sunghoon stood and held his hands up for Jiwon. “Come hyung. I’ll read you read Harabeoji’s letter.”
“It’s addressed to you why should I read it?”
“So that I don’t have to explain anymore it’s all written there.”
Jiwon still wouldn’t move… Sunghoon, on the other hand was getting impatient.
There was only one way to persuade Jiwon, it works every time.
“Hyung… come on… It would take less time for both of us to just go to my room than me retrieving the letter and bringing it back here for you to read.” Then flashing Jiwon a smile, he started talking in a cute voice…. “Hyung…. hyung… kkaja hyung hmmm…” then he brought his face closer to Jiwon and started fluttering his eyes. He knew Jiwon hated it. “Hmmm… hmmm… hyung.”
Sunghoon could be so persuasive sometimes especially when he starts acting cute.
Even Jiwon felt helpless watching him. He smiles at Sunghoon.
Jiwon stood up and started ascending the stairs towards Sunghoon’s room…
“Arrasseo arrasseo… Aigoo, I thought by now you would stop doing that. Do you do that to all your friends back in Seoul?” Jiwon asked.
“Ei hyung, I only do that with you…” then flashing Jiwon an irresistible smile, he suddenly raced up the stairs and shouted…”last one to arrive’s an ugly monster!”
Jiwon watched Sunghoon’s retreating back and shook his head… Then he too raced up the stairs to Sunghoon’s room.
“What does your grandfather mean?” Jiwon asked after reading the letter. He had a hunch, and he liked the idea but he didn’t want to get his expectations up. If he was right, the decision would be Sunghoon’s.
Sunghoon looked intently at Jiwon. He was debating whether to tell him or not. He couldn’t explain why he was anxious. The idea itself wasn’t absurd but suggesting it would definitely feel different.
“I think my grandfather means only one thing hyung.”
Silence…… Sunghoon closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He knew he was worrying for nothing but still, Jiwon might not like it. He had to get the words out of his mouth before he choked on them.
“Grandfather left this house for us ’cause he wants us to live here together and take care of it.” Sunghoon said hurriedly, then he looked at Jiwon’s reaction.
He didn’t have one. Sunghoon just met Jiwon’s intense stare. He thought he would be surprised, reluctant even, but the lack of reaction made him all the more nervous. Sunghoon swallowed.
“Well hyung what do you think?”
Jiwon just continued staring at Sunghoon. It was as if he was trying to read Sunghoon’s mind. In reality, he didn’t mind, not at all. In fact, he wanted to.
But he was thinking about Sunghoon. Jeju is far from Seoul. If Sunghoon decides to live there, he’d have to give up on training. So Jiwon just asked, “What about you?”
Sunghoon actually made up his mind the moment he read the letter and learned of his grandfather’s wishes. But he was curious as to how Jiwon would take it. It’s not normal for two teenagers to just live together. Maybe if they were attending the same school, that would be plausible, but this was different. Living here means staying far away from Seoul. Sunghoon already asked his parents about it, to which they said it was up to him. He was even surprised since they were too cool about it, he wondered just what the hell his grandfather told them in those letters. Now looking at Jiwon, he can see from his eyes that the decision would come from him.
After all, he had a lot more at stake what with his training and studies.
“What about your training? What about school Sunghoon? If you decide to live here you’re bound to leave them all behind. You’ll have to transfer schools, you’ll have to….” Jiwon paused. He knew Sunghoon’s ultimate dream was to be a singer.
“You’d have to…”
“I’ve already thought about it a lot hyung…” Sunghoon cut him off. “I honestly don’t mind foregoing training, I know that’s what you mean. I’m only 17 I think I still need time to enjoy my teenage years. Besides, I won’t be alone. You would be here right? You wouldn’t mind living with me right?”
There it was. The words he had wanted to ask Jiwon. He got nervous. It felt like he was asking Jiwon to date him, which he thought was a strange analogy. He had a lot of thoughts running through his mind as he waited with bated breath for Jiwon’s answer.
Jiwon smiled. The sweetest smile he’s ever seen him give. Sunghoon let out a sigh of relief. He didn’t need to hear what Jiwon had to say next for everything was already confirmed with that smile. “Of course I wouldn’t mind. When do you want me to move in?” Sunghoon smiled back. “Now.”
Chapter 4: Glimpses of the Past
Present day, Hawaii
He hasn’t heard the name in a while. Only one person calls him that. Sunghoon’s heart ached. But more than the pain, the anger won. Sunghoon straightened, snapped out of his reverie, and sidestepped Jiwon to enter the hotel. He had to keep going. If he didn’t, he wondered how far his resolve would go. He forced himself to ignore him even when his heart ached for him badly.
“Hoonie-ah…” Jiwon mumbled when he went past him.
Sunghoon kept going, the tears threatening to fall. God how he missed that voice! It was all he could do to not turn around and give Jiwon a hug. Finally he managed to confirm his reservation from the receptionist. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jiwon still standing at the entrance, looking sadly at him. He urged himself to calm down so he took a deep breath and made his way to his room. Sunghoon felt the elevator ride was so slow but he couldn’t wait to be alone. He had to think clearly and manage his racing heart. Out of all the places they could meet, why here? It’s as if he’s being played by fate. He suddenly realized he shouldn’t have wished for Jiwon to be here with him. It apparently came true.
Sunghoon finally reached his room, and upon unlocking it, dropped his bags near the door. He felt tired. He felt drained. The image of Jiwon looking at him sadly crept into his mind and before Sunghoon could stop it, the tears began to fall.
Jiwon sat by the cabana overlooking the beach, holding a beer in his hand, his mind a rumble of thoughts, his heart a mess. He didn’t think he would see Sunghoon here out of all places. Especially in this hotel! Fate was playing tricks on him.
He couldn’t remove the look of pain on Sunghoon’s face when he saw him. His heart constricted. He wanted to hug him right then and there, but he knew he shouldn’t.
He didn’t even have the right to show his face after what he had done. But his heart still longed for him, try as he might to deny it. If he could he would go back, but what’s done is done. There was no use pondering over what ifs. He knew he hurt Sunghoon deeply. Jiwon sighed… he didn’t know what to do… Jiwon sighed again.
“I wish I was dead.”
Jiwon woke up to the unfamiliar environment. He blinked, and for a moment forgot where he was. Then he realized he was in Sunghoon’s house… no… their house. He got up and slowly made his way towards the bathroom.
Opening the door, he had a glimpse of naked flawless fair skin and Sunghoon’s startled face looking back at him…
Caught off guard, Jiwon slammed the door shut. An adjoining bathroom?!. What the hell?!
“Ya! Don’t you know how to lock the door when you’re taking a bath?!?” Jiwon shouted at Sunghoon.
Sunghoon stuck his head out the door and looked at Jiwon. Then he smiled sweetly when he saw that Jiwon was flushed. “Mianhe hyung. I guess I must get used to having a roommate.”
“Why does our rooms share a bathroom?”
“Aaah…. I forgot to tell you. Mine’s the master bedroom, yours was once grandma’s studio. Grandfather had it renovated into a bedroom after grandma died. Guess he forgot to have another bathroom built.” then after saying that, Sunghoon closed the door and continued his bath.
Jiwon tried to collect himself… Seeing Sunghoon like that… He’s suddenly feeling hot again, his cheeks burning… He knows he’s going to have a hard time removing that from memory.
He knocked on the door and said “Sunghoon-ah… We have lots of things to do today.”
“Arayeo hyung!” then opening the door, with only a towel wrapping him from waist down, Sunghoon ushered Jiwon in. “You were also going to use the bathroom right? I’m finished.” then Sunghoon made his way towards his bedroom.
Jiwon just shook his head at Sunghoon. Then trying to collect himself, he took a cold shower to tone down the heat he’s been feeling since a while ago.
Later that day, after completing all the tasks at hand, Jiwon sat by the beach waiting for sunset… He needs time to think alone, time to reflect on his feelings. Being with Sunghoon the whole day, he couldn’t help but question just how much invested his feelings for Sunghoon are. He knows he loves him, no doubt, but until then he believed he loved him like a brother. Now, being with him, Jiwon is confused. He couldn’t understand why every time Sunghoon smiles at him, his heart flutters. Even when he touches his hand slightly, goosebumps crawl through his skin, and the way Sunghoon whispers his name, like a caress, he feels butterflies in his stomach. He would sometimes wonder if he really likes Sunghoon more than what a brother should. So he sat there, oblivious of the fact that someone was watching him.
Sunghoon stood at the balcony watching Jiwon. He wanted to sit beside him but he’s been noticing how Jiwon would keep his distance whenever they got closer. Unlike Jiwon though, Sunghoon knows what he feels. And even though he likes girls too, not even one of them can provide this much intense feelings he has for Jiwon. Even before Jiwon came to live with him, he has already accepted the fact that he likes him more than a brother… and even though he knows Jiwon denies what he truly feels for him, he wouldn’t push him. He knew that if he did, he’d end up losing him and that’s what he’s afraid of. So he stood there, watching the man he treasures more than anyone.
Jiwon’s 20th birthday
Sunghoon has been busy all day. From the moment he woke up, he’s been preparing like crazy. Today was Jiwon’s birthday, the day he becomes an adult… and like any other adult, of course, he’s allowed to drink. He admits he admires Jiwon’s resolve. Jiwon promised not to drink until he reaches legal age (even when Sunghoon dared him so many times surprisingly he refused). So today he prepares everything. The cake, the food, the booze (although he didn’t buy a lot as he’s not allowed to drink yet). He had everything planned out. He would request Jiwon to buy something from the supermarket and upon his return the surprise will be waiting for him.
“Jiwon-hyung!!!” Sunghoon called out.
“Wae?!” Jiwon asked back while busy cleaning the car.
“Can you buy some rice from the super? I didn’t notice we ran out of it already.”
Sunghoon said, coming out into the front yard where Jiwon was.
“Why don’t you buy it yourself?” Jiwon asked, although you can tell by his voice he was joking.
Sunghoon smiled, “Na-ah, not me. I’m cooking dinner tonight.”
‘That blasted smile again’, Jiwon thought to himself.
“Arrasseo, I’m nearly finished here. You have to give me money though. I’m broke” said Jiwon in a sheepish grin.
“Waaah hyung!! It’s your turn this week!”
Sunghoon and Jiwon promised to split their expenses alternately every week. Still grinning, Jiwon strode up to Sunghoon and ruffled his hair.
“I’m only joking Hoonie.” Then looking closely at Sunghoon he asked, “Anything else you need?”
With his face so close to Sunghoon’s, Sunghoon flushed red.
“N…nothing else hyung…” he stammered and cleared his throat.
Jiwon, upon seeing Sunghoon blush, smiled broadly at him. “Okay. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” and with that being said, he strode towards the car, started it and backed it out of the front yard onto the street to do Sunghoon’s bidding.
Sunghoon let loose a breath. Having Jiwon’s face so close to him like that…. he sighed. He had to prepare everything before Jiwon gets home so Sunghoon set off to prepare everything.
After several minutes Jiwon got home. He actually got something for Sunghoon, something Sunghoon really liked since they were kids. That was why he took a long time, he had to play the toy cranes in the arcade to get it. He knew Sunghoon would be pleased.
Upon entering the house he strode towards the kitchen to deposit the rice and groceries he bought. After that, he sought out to find where Sunghoon was.
“I’m at the dining room hyung!” came the faint reply.
The dining room was situated two doors from the kitchen so Jiwon made his way towards it.
Jiwon stopped short. The dining room was pitch black. He tried to find the light switch but just then flickering light of the candles illuminated Sunghoon’s face at the end of the dining table, beaming at him, singing…
“Saeng-il chukahamnida! Saeng-il chukahamnida! Saranghaneun Jiwon-hyung! Saeng-il chukahamnida!”
Then without waiting for his reaction, Sunghoon strode towards where Jiwon was standing, took his hand, and made him stand in front of the birthday cake, and by putting his hand on Jiwon’s shoulder, Sunghoon whispered, “make a wish hyung…”
Jiwon smiled. Now he knew why Sunghoon wanted him out of the house. He made a wish silently and blew the candles.
“Whoohh!!! Happy birthday hyung!!!” and upon saying that, Sunghoon switched on the lights to reveal what he prepared for Jiwon.
Jiwon couldn’t hide his surprise nor how pleased he was. His favorite food, stir-fried meatballs, was at the center, along with other recipes he liked eating well.
His gaze fell upon the bottles of soju on the end and he knew Sunghoon bought them because he’s officially an adult now. Jiwon strode towards Sunghoon and hugged him tightly.
“Thank you Hoonie-ah.” he said silently.
Sunghoon hugged him back just as tightly and they stood there, just hugging each other for what felt like minutes. Then Sunghoon let go of Jiwon and placed his hands on Jiwon’s shoulders, smiling at him.
“Hyung….” Sunghoon cleared his throat… “You know that I love you right?”
Jiwon looked at Sunghoon looking at him, and he knew in his heart, that he felt the exact same way. So instead of answering, Jiwon held Sunghoon’s face in his hands, and brought their lips together.
Chapter 5: Love Blossoms
The kiss was unexpected. Sunghoon partially froze when Jiwon’s lips met his. And, Jiwon, feeling Sunghoon surprised, didn’t push but neither did he stop. He stood there, with Sunghoon’s face in his hands, his lips on his lips, waiting for Sunghoon to push him away but he didn’t.
After a moment, his heart beating fast, he felt Sunghoon’s hands travel down from his shoulders to his back, then Sunghoon started kissing him back.
Jiwon didn’t need further urging, he slowly answered Sunghoon’s kisses, taking Sunghoon’s lower lip and sucking on them lightly. His lips felt soft as velvet against his.
‘This’…. he thought, ‘this feels right.’
Sunghoon let out a soft moan, and Jiwon, upon hearing that, supported Sunghoon’s neck in his one hand, his other hand on his waist pulling him closer to him and deepened the kiss even more.
Testing just how far Sunghoon would let him go, he kept on nipping Sunghoon’s lower lip, sliding his tongue against his, teasing him, trying to part his lips, wanting to taste the sweetness within. He was bursting with desire, but he couldn’t rush, so he took his time, nipping Sunghoon’s lips lightly, sometimes running his tongue through his lips, seeking entrance.
Sunghoon loved the feel of Jiwon’s lips on him, his body echoing Jiwon’s desire.
He always wondered how it would feel, but imaginations are nothing compared to this. Jiwon’s lips were surprisingly soft against his, he tasted the fresh breeze of the sea in him, manly yet gentle, and when Jiwon ran his tongue on his lips, he shuddered. It all felt new to Sunghoon. He couldn’t stifle the moan of pleasure escaping him. He wanted more. He wanted it all. He opened his mouth and let him in. Jiwon felt it, and he didn’t hesitate. Tilting his head, he held Sunghoon tightly, took his tongue in his in a teasing gesture and slowly deepened the kiss. Sunghoon tasted of honey. Jiwon would lick, nip and suck… waves of pleasure crashing over him. It was just a kiss but he was hungry, hungry for Sunghoon’s taste, as if he couldn’t get enough. He kissed him, slowly at first but soon, their kisses got urgent, torrid… lips against lips, tongue against tongue until both of them were moaning softly of pleasure.
Sunghoon broke off the kiss first, his breath ragged. His lips were a bit sore, his heart still racing. Eyes still laced with desire, he looked at Jiwon, a smile forming on his lips.
Jiwon didn’t want the kiss to end, but sensing that Sunghoon wanted to say something, he stared at him, marveling just how pure and beautiful he looked while smiling. Jiwon smiled back. Sunghoon’s lips were sore, he couldn’t fight back the desire he felt while kissing him. He gently touched Sunghoon’s lower lip, tracing the sore part with his thumb.
“Are you okay?” he whispered. “I think I got a little excited.”
“I’m fine, hyung.” said Sunghoon, gently biting his thumb and licking it. He heard Jiwon’s sharp intake of breath, and he smiled at him. Then he released Jiwon’s thumb and instead laced their fingers together.
Jiwon squeezed his hand tightly and asked. “Why’d you stop? Did you not like….”
“Anieyo hyung!!” Sunghoon said while shaking his head. “It was amazing. It’s just that….”
Sunghoon pouted, in an effortlessly cute way that made Jiwon’s heart flutter. “The food’s getting cold, hyung. I don’t want my efforts to go to waste you know.”
Jiwon chuckled… how typically Sunghoon…
He couldn’t resist though. Sunghoon spent the day preparing for him, of course, he’ll show his appreciation.
Sunghoon let go of Jiwon’s hands and gestured for them to eat. Turning, he made to sit down but Jiwon hugged him from behind, and nuzzled his cheek against Sunghoon’s neck…
“Arrasseo…. but Hoonie-ah…” Jiwon whispered softly against Sunghoon’s ear, lightly nipping his earlobe, his arms wrapped tightly against Sunghoon’s waist.
Sunghoon swallowed hard. Jiwon’s lips on his ear’s giving him goosebumps. He shuddered, desire creeping slowly to his groin. He tried to push it away. “Nae hyung?” he said softly, his answer almost inaudible.
Jiwon smiled against him, and still teasing, he planted a kiss on Sunghoon’s neck, whispering, his voice languid, “we aren’t finished yet.”
And with that, he let go of Sunghoon, strode towards a seat facing him, and, still looking at Sunghoon intently, smiled at him gestured for them both to eat.
Sunghoon sat down, slowly, for he didn’t want Jiwon to see just how weak his knees are feeling right now… He couldn’t help but wonder, just how far Jiwon intends to go… Not that he’s complaining… Telling himself to relax, he smiled back and started to eat.
Dinner was a delight, Jiwon thought.
Standing on the balcony in his room Jiwon looked out at the sea… This was the first time he felt really peaceful and the sea somehow agrees with him. It’s a beautiful night, the moon visible against the lack of clouds, the stars shining brightly. He felt as if the burden has been lifted off of him and he knew why.
Coming out, and acknowledging his feelings for Sunghoon was the right choice. He thought he would feel weird, but on the contrary, he felt relieved. What’s more, he’s happy. He doesn’t regret it at all, anyway, Sunghoon surely feels the same.
Judging from the way they kissed….
A smile crept on Jiwon’s lips as he tenderly touched it. He can still taste Sunghoon and he couldn’t get enough. He took a deep breath to stay calm. Just thinking of Sunghoon makes his heart race now, the beating loud against his chest.
A pair of milky white arms encircled him from the back, and Jiwon tenderly touched them, stroking Sunghoon’s hands, his fair skin a stark contrast to his tan colored one. He laced his fingers with Sunghoon’s, and gently brought his hand to his lips, kissing it in a loving gesture. His heart felt like it was going to burst.
He hadn’t felt this kind of strong feelings for anyone, only Sunghoon. Letting go of Sunghoon’s hand he turned around to face him. Sunghoon looked back at him, with the ever present smile on his face.
Gingerly, he traced his finger on Sunghoon’s face and Sunghoon closed his eyes. Jiwon’s heart melted. He kissed him, just a peck, but it was enough to fuel his desire, one he’s been keeping in check the whole evening. He placed his hand on Sunghoon, and Sunghoon smiled at him again, his eyes intent on his face, eyes full of love.
“Hoonie-ah, saranghae…..” Jiwon whispered… the words coming out of his mouth before he could stop them.
Sunghoon’s worries flew out the window upon hearing those words. A single tear escaped from his eye, but Jiwon wiped it away, making Sunghoon smile wider. He was relieved that Jiwon finally acknowledged his feelings for him, and he couldn’t be happier. It felt like it was his birthday not Jiwon’s. Sunghoon placed his hands on Jiwon’s face and planted a kiss on his lips.
“Nadeu saranghae hyung” Sunghoon answered back and hugged Jiwon tightly.
They stayed that way for a while, each relishing the warmth of their bodies against each other, content in each other’s arms.
Jiwon felt the cold sea breeze against his back and finally let go, leading Sunghoon inside his room.
“It’s getting cold, let’s go inside.” then holding Sunghoon’s hand in his, he made him sit on the bed, and told him to wait.
“Why hyung? What is it?” asked Sunghoon, curious.
“I forgot to give you something….aah… we were a little busy a while ago…” Jiwon replied, a sheepish grin on his lips.
Sunghoon blushed… “You pounced on me so suddenly…” he said pouting.
Jiwon laughed… “Pounced? What am I a lion?” then bending his back, he inched his face closer to Sunghoon and said in a low voice, “don’t tell me you didn’t like it?” he said with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
Sunghoon blushing redder told him enough and he chuckled. He straightened and made his way quickly downstairs to where the plush toy lay forgotten.
Retrieving the present, Jiwon made his way back towards the room, sat next to Sunghoon and handed him the bag.
Opening the bag, Sunghoon smiled upon seeing a Pikachu stuffed toy inside. He was touched. Jiwon still remembers his favorite…
“Thank you hyung.”
Jiwon shook his head. “No thank you. Today was the best birthday I had. Jinjja gomaweo.”
Sunghoon smiled at Jiwon. “I think my birthday came earlier though…” Jiwon chuckled. “Well, we haven’t even finished.” Then taking the toy and the bag from Sunghoon’s hands, he placed them on the bedside table. “Ani, we haven’t really started.” Then Jiwon gently pushed Sunghoon on the bed, his back hitting the mattress softly, while Jiwon positioned himself on top of him.
Sunghoon waited with bated breath. Jiwon was just looking at him though, and Sunghoon, sensing Jiwon’s hesitation, arched his eyebrows questioningly.
Jiwon swallowed… “Hoonie-ah, are you sure you want to do it with me?” Jiwon was merely anxious. What if Sunghoon didn’t want him? After all, they were both men.
It was his first time too (with a guy that is) but he didn’t feel strange. In fact, he was looking forward to it. He wanted to show Sunghoon just how much he loves him.
Sunghoon smiled at Jiwon, then gently holding Jiwon’s face in his hands, he brought his face down and kissed him tenderly, easing Jiwon’s worries. Sunghoon didn’t mind at all. He more than wanted it. He only wanted Jiwon and no one else.
Nothing matters tonight but them only.
Jiwon kissed him back. Tenderly, slow kisses that both excited and fulfilled them. But then those kisses became urgent, until Jiwon plunged his tongue into Sunghoon’s, searching, teasing Sunghoon to do the same. Sunghoon’s tongue met his, and a moan escaped him. Jiwon tasted Sunghoon, their tongues clashing against each other, their desire increasing by the minute. He could feel Sunghoon’s arousal against his, and Jiwon upon feeling that, his groin getting painful as they progress, held up Sunghoon’s hands, lifting them over his head and gently took of Sunghoon’s shirt.
Sunghoon’s pale skin glowed against the lamp lit room. He was catching his breath, the rise and fall of his chest visible even in the dim room. Sunghoon reached down, taking the helm of Jiwon’s shirt in his hands and taking it off of him. He threw it off the bed, the shirt landing next to where his shirt ended on the floor. He wanted to feel Jiwon’s skin next to him but Jiwon had another idea.
Pinning Sunghoon’s hands against his, Jiwon started kissing Sunghoon’s neck. Nibbling, his lips working their way up and down Sunghoon’s neck and throat, while Sunghoon moaned with pleasure. Sunghoon was fully aroused now, he could feel it.
But he was no different. Their bodies were echoing each other’s desire but Jiwon wanted to give Sunghoon a memorable night, one full of satisfaction. So he did not rush. His lips slowly made their way to Sunghoon’s left shoulder, lightly biting him. Sunghoon struggled against Jiwon, freeing his hands, and he gingerly stroked Jiwon’s back, the heat emanating from their bodies a welcome rush.
“Hyung….” Sunghoon said hoarsely.
Jiwon’s lips met his in an urgent kiss.
“Ssshhh…” Jiwon whispered against his lips. “I want you to enjoy babe…”
Babe…. Hearing Jiwon call him that sent shivers down Sunghoon’s spine and Sunghoon kissed Jiwon fervently. Their lips locking, their hands roaming against each other’s body…
Jiwon slid down towards Sunghoon’s chest, and trailed kisses from his shoulders down to his nipples. Then raising his head slightly, he saw Sunghoon looking at him, then he winked mischievously, and took a nipple into his mouth.
Sunghoon groaned with pleasure. Jiwon’s tongue on his was tickling, but at the same time, the pleasure it brought nearly made him lose his mind. He held on to Jiwon’s head, while Jiwon’s tongue made small sucking sounds against him. Sunghoon was literally moaning uncontrollably. The pleasure was indescribable. He couldn’t take it any longer. He took Jiwon’s head in his hands and gently raised it to look at him. Jiwon’s eyes were burning with desire, and Sunghoon saw his face mirrored there, desire also etched in his features. They looked at each other, both catching their breaths.
“Hyung… I need a breather… please…” Sunghoon whispered.
Jiwon didn’t answer back. Instead, he rolled away from Sunghoon, and positioned Sunghoon on top of him. Sunghoon, surprised by Jiwon’s actions, could only stare at him.
Jiwon lifted his head and kissed Sunghoon slowly, his lips teasing and sucking, then Jiwon whispered against Sunghoon’s lips…
“Do you want to do the same?”
Jiwon held Sunghoon’s face in his hands, and whispered again.
“What I just did a while ago, do you want to try doing it?”
Sunghoon smiled. If Jiwon wished it, then he’ll do it. So Sunghoon did the same to Jiwon until Jiwon was moaning with pleasure.
Jiwon couldn’t take it anymore. He rolled on top of Sunghoon again and kissed him hard while his hands were busily working on Sunghoon’s pants trying to free him of any clothing. Sunghoon’s hands were urgent too. He reached down and fumbled with Jiwon’s clothes both wanting to feel their bodies close together, their desire for each other nearing the edge.
Jiwon got rid of Sunghoon’s clothes first, Sunghoon following suit. Holding Sunghoon tightly against him in one hand, he kissed him fervently while taking his pulsing organ into his hand and stroked him up and down, in a rhythmic beat, slowly at first, building his climax. Sunghoon clung to him, their lips twined together, his head floating with pleasure from Jiwon’s kisses and the warmth of his hand on him. He couldn’t let Jiwon do all the work, so he reached down and took Jiwon’s fully aroused penis in his hand, doing the same thing he was experiencing.
Their movements perfectly in sync, their pleasured moans stifled by their kisses, they reached their climax at the same time. Their breaths ragged, Jiwon crashed against Sunghoon’s, totally spent, while Sunghoon held him, their sweaty bodies intertwined together. After a few moments, Jiwon rolled his body away from Sunghoon, and lay beside him, breathing slowly back to normal. Sunghoon shifted his body closer to Jiwon, resting his head against his shoulder. Jiwon gingerly placed his arm under Sunghoon’s head while Sunghoon hugged him, placing his hand upon Jiwon’s chest. They looked at each other, and Jiwon tenderly stroked Sunghoon’s face with his finger, smiling at him. Sunghoon smiled back, and moved his body closer, finding content in Jiwon’s warm embrace.
“I love you hyung” Sunghoon whispered against Jiwon’s chest.
Jiwon placed a tender kiss on Sunghoon’s forehead and whispered back… “I love you more.”
Sunghoon closed his eyes. He felt at home in Jiwon’s arms. Jiwon, too, felt peaceful holding a precious angel in his arms. He kept on stroking Sunghoon’s hair until they both were overtaken by sleep…
Thank you for subscribing. Thank you for reading. Chapter 6 will be more on the why and how, interchanging between the past and present lives of Jiwon and Sunghoon. Please have a little more patience. It might take me sometime for the chapter to finish..!!
Chapter 6 Part 1: Memories
Hello I decided to cut Chapter 6 in parts since it will dwell on Sunghoon’s stay in Hawaii plus a trip down memory lane. I still honestly don’t know how many parts there will be. Please enjoy. Thank you.
Sunghoon’s eyes were swollen upon waking up. Looking at himself in the mirror, he sighed. He must have fallen asleep crying. Seeing Jiwon yesterday made him remember the pain, but more than the pain, he missed Jiwon dearly, try as he might to deny it.
Sunghoon decided though that he shouldn’t ruin his vacation. All he had to do was avoid Jiwon anyway, so, he’ll spend most of his days outside and only come back to the hotel to sleep.
After showering, Sunghoon looked at the various flyers of activities available in Hawaii. There were many. He decided to tour the place first before he hit the beach.
A soft knock on his door announced the arrival of room service. Puzzled, he opened it and let the hotel staff in.
A petite young woman smiled at him and pushed a food cart into his room saying, “Good morning sir. Your breakfast for today. Please enjoy your meal!”
“But I didn’t order any breakfast.” Sunghoon stated, clearly confused.
The staff just smiled at him.
“This is compliments of the hotel sir. Thank you for choosing to stay with us. And, after you have finished, please just leave the cart outside your room. Our staff will pick it up later. Enjoy your meal sir!”
At that, Sunghoon smiled back at her. “Thank you.”
As soon as the staff left, Sunghoon sat down and took off the lid of the cart. To his surprise, white rice and kimchi-jjigae was there along with a cup of Americano.
‘Wow, they must know I’m Korean’ Sunghoon thought and started to eat.
Sunghoon went down and asked the receptionist where he could rent a car to tour the city. He was pleased to know that the hotel actually has cars offered to guests for a fee.
‘This hotel is amazing’ Sunghoon thought as he drove the car out of the driveway.
He then set out to start his adventure not knowing that someone’s been watching him all this time.
Jiwon quietly looked at every single thing Sunghoon did from the moment he stepped into the lobby, Sunghoon oblivious to the fact that he was there. He still looked the same. The angel face he loved. He missed him terribly. He knew though that Sunghoon wanted to avoid him so he just sat there, watching him quietly, his heart aching.
Sunghoon drove around the place, sightseeing. Hawaii’s truly pretty. Driving around Hawaii made Sunghoon reminisce. He and Jiwon would talk about living here till they grow old. Away from the critiques of people about their relationship. At least, here, people didn’t mind being gay or lesbian. And they’ll be by the beach, which they both love. Sunghoon sighed, his sunglasses reflecting the sunlight as he drove. He felt like he was driving down memory lane.
Jeju 2 weeks after Jiwon’s birthday
Jiwon and Sunghoon sat by the beach, the night air sending ripples of waves up the shore, quietly ruffling their hair. They were holding each other’s hands, relishing in the warmth. Sunghoon rests his head on Jiwon’s shoulder, and as much as Jiwon wanted to wrap his arms around Sunghoon, he couldn’t. People will see, and they talk. He hated it. If only people could understand them.
“Nae hyung?” Sunghoon asked, his head coming up to look at Jiwon questioningly.
Jiwon looked at him, the moonlight reflecting his handsome features which Sunghoon loved. Sunghoon wanted to kiss him right there, but he restrained himself, not wanting the gossip.
“What do you say we live somewhere else?” Jiwon asked.
“Somewhere else? You mean Seoul?”
“Anniya… I mean outside of Korea.”
Sunghoon looked at Jiwon closely, wondering what he was thinking. He never really thought about living anywhere. “Why hyung? Do you not like it here?”
“Of course I like it here. I have you, it’s just I don’t like the people here. They look at us like we’re a disease or something.”
People really have been saying things about them. Not that they could really blame them though. After what happened, they were a bit more… well, the skinship’s a bit excessive, especially for conservative people. It even reached Sunghoon’s parents, to which Sunghoon has adamantly defended them when he was asked about it.
He didn’t deny though, nor did he confirm.
Sunghoon sighed. He held Jiwon’s hand tighter.
“You mean you want to live in a place where people can accept us?”
“Of course I do! Don’t you want the same thing?” was Jiwon’s vigorous reply.
He wanted to care for Sunghoon openly. He didn’t want to restrict his actions in the confines of their home. He didn’t want to hide. If anything, he wanted to show them just how lucky he was Sunghoon even liked him, no, loved him back.
Sunghoon smiled. He wanted the same thing. For people to understand that love is not shared among men and women only.
“Just where would we go hyung?”
“Hawaii. We can live there by the beach. And people wouldn’t care less about two men living together.”
“At the very least Hoonie-ah, we don’t have to hide anymore.” Jiwon said softly.
Sunghoon looked at him lovingly. Every time Jiwon says sweet things like that, he makes his heart flutter. He knew Jiwon was frustrated. He too felt the same.
“Arrasseo hyung. When we’ve saved enough, let’s go there.”
Jiwon smiled. That smile always shatters Sunghoon’s defenses. He wanted to kiss him right then and there.
Jiwon, surprised at the tone of his voice, looked questioningly at Sunghoon.
“Let’s go home…” Sunghoon said.
Understanding dawned on Jiwon. He chuckled…
“Aigoo, Hoonie-ah… arrasseo, let’s go,” Jiwon said, then he slowly turned his head to whisper at Sunghoon, making Sunghoon shiver when his breath made contact with him, “you’ll be surprised at what I’ll do to you when we get there.” Jiwon said provocatively.
The walk home couldn’t get any shorter for Sunghoon.
Jiwon kept on pacing back and forth in his office, the nameplate on his desk becoming blurred in his vision. He was restless. He heard from the staff that Sunghoon rented one of the hotel cars and went for a drive. But it’s already past 10 in the evening and he hasn’t come back yet. He was starting to worry. Sunghoon hated staying outside for too long, what’s more, he hated driving a lot.
A knock on the door, and his secretary came inside.
“Any news?” asked Jiwon hurriedly even before his secretary could close the door.
“Sir we just received a call from Mr. Kang. He’s got a flat tire out by the Boulevard. As you know it’s pretty far out there, the signal was a bit erratic so he couldn’t call right away. I already called for the towing company…”
“No, cancel that… I mean fine, call the company but don’t let Sunghoon ride the truck,” said Jiwon as he grabbed his jacket and put it on.
Puzzled, the secretary looked a t him and asked.
“But sir, just how will Mr. Kang come back here?”
“I’ll pick him up myself. Tell the towing company to wait for me there.” Then without waiting for her reply, he grabbed his keys and set out to get Sunghoon.
His secretary looked at her boss’ leaving and just shook her head but followed Jiwon’s instructions. She always found her boss strange in many ways, but this time, his apparent attachment to Mr. Kang must be something deep, otherwise… well, this was the first time she saw her boss go out of his way to satisfy a guest even letting him stay for free. But her instructions were clear.
Mr. Kang should never know that her boss is the owner of the hotel.
Chapter 6 Part 2: Reasons
I literally cried making this chapter. Hope you enjoy and wait for the next one. Thank you.
Jiwon tried not to drive too fast. But he couldn’t find it in himself to relax knowing Sunghoon was alone. The Boulevard. Most tourists don’t go there especially at night. It’s where most gangs hang out and Sunghoon…. he shook his head. He shouldn’t think negatively. Still, he sped up as much as the speed limit was allowed.
Reaching the Boulevard, Jiwon let out a sigh of relief when he saw the truck. At least Sunghoon was no longer alone. He screeched to a halt beside the rental car and got out. What he didn’t prepare was an explanation as to why he was there… He might as well wing whatever reason pops into his head what matters is Sunghoon’s safety.
If Sunghoon was surprised that he had to wait for a car to pick him up instead of riding in the tow truck, he was more surprised that it was Jiwon doing that. His heart skipped a beat, much to his dismay. His mind might be thinking straight but his heart always betrays him.
“Sunghoon-ah, are you okay?” said Jiwon, already running up to inspect if Sunghoon was hurt.
“Gwaenchannayo nan…“ said Sunghoon, hanging his head.
Sunghoon couldn’t look Jiwon in the eye. He had a glimpse of how worried Jiwon was and he feared his heart faltering.
Jiwon knew Sunghoon wants to avoid him but he didn’t care. All he wanted was him safe. In order to ease the tension, Jiwon turned to the truck driver.
“You’re ready to go right?” he asked to which the driver nodded. “Then, we can leave now. You can drive first, we’ll follow behind you. Thank you.”
“Sure.” and with that the driver turned on his heel and started the tow truck.
Jiwon then turned to Sunghoon.
“Please get in the car Hoon…Sunghoon-ah” Jiwon said softly. He nearly said Hoonie, the name he used to call him.
Sunghoon didn’t budge. Being alone in the car with Jiwon was not what he had in mind. It was a long drive to the hotel too, but Jiwon, impatient as he is, took him by the hand, and ushered him towards the passenger seat.
“Please get inside Sunghoon-ah. The longer we stay here, the more dangerous it gets for all of us.” said Jiwon, his eyes darting here and there, watching if any danger approaches.
Sunghoon wouldn’t have gotten in if he didn’t hear how worried Jiwon’s voice was, and how his eyes scanned the surroundings. So he sat quietly, while Jiwon closed the door after him. He then circled the car, got into the driver’s seat, and honked at the truck driver to get going.
Sunghoon cleared his throat, but Jiwon ignored him, his entire body tense.
Sunghoon rarely saw him like that, so he kept quiet, the tension inside the car hanging in the air. Only when they got out of the Boulevard and running into the main street did he hear Jiwon breathe a sigh of relief, his body relaxing.
Sunghoon hates this. As much as he’s been avoiding Jiwon, fate still manages to bring them together. He didn’t like it. He didn’t like how close they were either.
He wanted to stop, and just walk back to the hotel if he had to, anything was better than this.
He hated how his heart fluttered, looking at Jiwon driving. He hated how he missed being with him, hated how the memories betray him. He should be feeling angry, but looking at Jiwon beside him, all he wanted to do was reach out to him, and hold his hand while he was driving, just the way they used to. Back then, he always loved watching him drive, even when he held his hand, he looked so cool. This time was no different. He’s still as cool and manly as before, but this time he’s gotten more handsome.
Sunghoon shook his head to clear his thoughts. ‘Look outside’ he told himself. ‘Just don’t look at him.’ But then he remembered something.
“H-hyung….” he started.
“Yes what is it?” came the curt reply.
Sunghoon cleared his throat. “I was told someone from the hotel was going to pick me up, why was it you? Do you work for the hotel?” asked Sunghoon, the question coming in a rush.
Jiwon looked at Sunghoon pondering the question. Nothing really changed with him, he was still as curious as ever. Jiwon’s lips formed a sad smile, one Sunghoon didn’t see, for he was busy staring at the window. He then decided to tell him partial truth.
“Yes I work there. I’ve been working there for a year.”
Then the silence returned. Sunghoon didn’t know how to continue the conversation so he just stayed quiet, Jiwon also silent beside him. Every so often, they would glance at each other, but both would quickly turn away.
The hotel looming just meters ahead was a welcome sight for Sunghoon. And as soon as Jiwon drove up to the entrance, Sunghoon took off his seat belt and alighted from the car as fast as he could.
“Sunghoon-ah!” Jiwon called out.
Sunghoon stopped but he didn’t turn around.
“Sunghoon-ssi…” Jiwon said more quietly.
It was the formal way he addressed him that made Sunghoon turn around and look at Jiwon, only to find him looking wistfully at him. The sadness in his eyes evident.
“What?” Sunghoon said, trying to sound indifferent.
Jiwon walks up to him, and stops in front of him at arm’s length. Then he put his hands inside his pockets and stared at him sorrowfully.
“You really hate me don’t you?” his voice breaking.
It wasn’t a question. Jiwon stated it in a matter-of-factly way but the way he said it, the pain on Jiwon’s face as he said those words was so evident it broke Sunghoon’s heart. Sunghoon was quiet. He didn’t know how to respond. He wanted to say he didn’t really hate him but it seems his voice won’t come out. He didn’t know how to comfort him.
“Just hear me out then.” Jiwon said. Then taking a deep breath to steady himself…
“I know I’ve… I know you think I abandoned you back then, but I had my reasons, one I lost the chance to explain to you. I…“ he trailed, his voice shaking.
Steadying himself, Jiwon took out a letter from his jacket pocket and handed it to him.
Sunghoon reluctantly took it from him.
“I started writing that years ago. I wrote and rewrote that letter so many times…” Jiwon sighed. “You can throw it away if you want to and go on hating me… But I hope you read it. It’s the only chance I have since you won’t talk to me…”
Sunghoon still chose to stay quiet.
“I guess you’re tired. I’ll let you rest then…” Jiwon said defeatedly.
Sunghoon turned towards the hotel to enter but not before he heard Jiwon’s voice, which made his heart beat faster, his eyes on the verge of tears again.
“I really miss you… badly… I still love you…”
Sunghoon just walked away from him, towards the hotel.
Jiwon parked the car but didn’t get off. His heart felt heavy, like a ton of bricks kept it in place. He let out a breath, but the tears started falling.
Before he knew it, he was crying hard, the tears coming nonstop. He held on to the wheel and hung his head low, crying for everything he lost that night 10 years ago.
Chapter 6 Part 3: The Promise
I hope this part sheds some light to all your questions as to why they were estranged. Mainly, this was full of huge misunderstandings. It’s a bit of a read I hope you like it. Hopefully, the next part would be brighter. ✌✌
A phone call woke Jiwon up in the middle of the night. He looked at the clock and saw 3:45 reflected on it.
He groped around for his phone, finally getting hold of it from near his pillow and answered groggily. “Hello?” Sunghoon stirred sleepily beside him, his naked body seeking the warmth of his body, finding it and wrapped his arms around Jiwon’s waist, his head resting on Jiwon’s chest. Jiwon smiled contentedly stroking Sunghoon’s hair. Every day with Sunghoon felt like heaven to him. His mom’s worried voice on the other end shattered his fantasy. “Why, what happened?” said Jiwon. Jiwon listened intently to what his mom was saying, fear grabbing his being.
Sunghoon woke up to the sound of Jiwon’s worried voice. He lifted his head groggily, and saw Jiwon talking on the phone, his face etched with worry. Sunghoon then awoke fully, and sat up. Jiwon saw Sunghoon awake, and sat beside him, his hand holding on to Sunghoon’s. Sunghoon noticed how cold Jiwon’s hand was and was immediately concerned. He waited until Jiwon finished the call. “What happened, hyung?” Sunghoon asked as soon as Jiwon finished. “It’s my father. Mom said he’s been taken to the hospital… He looks bad, Hoonie-ah.” Jiwon’s voice broke. Sunghoon’s heart went out to him. He touched Jiwon’s face and stroked it gently. “What time are you leaving, hyung?” asked Sunghoon, fully understanding the situation. Jiwon’s mom wouldn’t call him at this hour if it wasn’t urgent. Jiwon kissed Sunghoon gratefully. “I’ll have to take the earliest flight available.” Sunghoon kissed him back, then got up. “Where are you going?” asked Jiwon puzzled. “I’ll prepare breakfast. The first flight leaves at 6:30 you can still catch it hyung…”
Sunghoon answered while putting on his robe. He couldn’t let Jiwon leave without eating. He needed energy. He didn’t want him to leave, but he has no choice.
Families do come first. “You want to come with me Hoonie?” Sunghoon stopped in mid-step, then looked back at Jiwon. “I need you there…” Jiwon added faintly.
Sunghoon scrutinized Jiwon’s features. This is the first time Jiwon looked so helpless that it pierced his heart. He always viewed Jiwon as a man with strong personality. He never really showed his weaknesses to anyone, not even to him. But this time, him looking fragile and weak made him decide right on. If Jiwon needed him, then he’ll be there. “Of course, hyung. I’ll go with you.” then he backtracked to the bed and hugged Jiwon tightly, “I’ll get breakfast ready and call the airline okay? You don’t have to bring anything just get ready okay?” “Thank you Hoonie-ah… Jjinja gomaweo…” Sunghoon nodded and went about preparing for their departure.
It’s about time they went back to Seoul.
Seoul Gimpo Airport
Sunghoon and Jiwon arrived at around a quarter to 8. They decided to take a train from the airport up to Yeouido which was the fastest and cheapest route. They didn’t bring anything with them, not feeling the need to pack. Anyways, they both had houses to go home to once in Seoul. After disembarking from the train, they then took a taxi to St. Mary’s Hospital where Jiwon’s father was hospitalized. The ICU felt unreal to Jiwon. He suddenly realized he hasn’t spent much time with his parents these past months and it dawned on him that he may not have much time with his father. His legs felt like lead, so he held onto Sunghoon’s arm for support. Sunghoon understood, so he put his arms around Jiwon and gently stroked his shoulder to reassure him. Jiwon, feeling slightly better from Sunghoon’s touch, took a deep breath and opened the door. Sunghoon felt like he was seeing his grandfather again. There were tubes attached to him monitoring his vitals. Jiwon’s mother sat by the bed, and for Sunghoon, she looked like she aged a lot from the last time he saw her. Sunghoon bowed low in greeting and Jiwon’s mom smiled in return. “Oh, Sunghoon-ah… Thank you for accompanying my son.” “It was no problem Auntie. Jiwon-hyung’s family to me, all of you are…” “Of course…” she sighed. “Honestly, I would have wanted a daughter-in-law but Jiwon just looked so happy with you we decided to accept it.” Sunghoon stood frozen on the spot. He thought he misheard her. Sunghoon looked at Jiwon in alarm. Jiwon smiled at him and rubbed his back gently. “I told them about us. You don’t have to worry. They’re perfectly fine with it.” Then turning to his mother, he asked, “How is he?” “He’s been in and out of consciousness all day. The doctors say they’re not optimistic.” his mom said, tears forming in her eyes. But then her gaze fell on Sunghoon who still hadn’t budged from his position. “Sunghoon-ah don’t be worried. I have nothing against you two. If anything, as long as my son is happy, then everything’s fine.”
Jiwon though, noticing how tense Sunghoon was, knew he needed time to absorb the shock. So he ruffled his hair, then rested his hand on his neck. Sunghoon, flinching at the sudden warmth, looked accusingly at Jiwon. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. It slipped my mind.” After a while, Sunghoon relaxed, the initial shock wearing off. He went to Jiwon’s mom and hugged her, a sign of his gratefulness. Jiwon’s mom hugged him back. “Auntie, thank you…” “Oh no, don’t mention it. I always thought of you as my son after all.” Then Jiwon’s mom broke off from Sunghoon and said quietly, “I do need a favor though. Can I speak to him in private?” “Of course…” then standing up, he walked towards Jiwon and clapped his hand on his shoulder saying, “I’ll be waiting in the lobby hyung. Call me if you need me okay?”
Jiwon nodded and squeezed his hand in return. Sunghoon quietly closed the door behind him leaving them to talk.
Jiwon sat by the chair opposite his mom watching the rise and fall of his father’s chest. Concern etched his handsome features. “Why didn’t he tell us about this mom?” “Your father’s always been like that, not wanting to worry anyone. If he didn’t collapse during a company dinner no one would know.” his mother said wistfully. “Still, he should’ve told us at the very least. If I had known…” His mother smiled sadly. “Did you know how happy your father was seeing you happy? He said there were only a number of times he saw your true smile, all of them when you are with Sunghoon. He must have felt guilty, too, knowing that he spends more time at the office than here. So he never said anything…“ “I don’t blame him about that! I’ve always been grateful to both of you. You must have had a hard time raising a brat like me… especially about Sunghoon. How hard it must be for both of you to accept…” “Son, we just want you happy…”
His father stirred and slowly opened his eyes. “Abeoji…” Jiwon scooted nearer his father and gently grasped his hand. “How are you feeling?” His father smiled weakly at him and tapped his arm with his free hand gently. He couldn’t speak loudly but Jiwon saw he was delighted to see him.
Sunghoon has been reading the same page of the magazine for some time now. He’s been feeling restless, not until he saw Jiwon making his way towards him. He stayed where he was. Judging from the way he looked, things must not be good. Jiwon sat beside Sunghoon sighing. “Are you okay?” Sunghoon asked worriedly. “I don’t know… It’s not looking good Hoonie-ah…” his voice breaking. “I talked to the doctor a while ago and he said Abeoji only has one month at best…” Sunghoon didn’t know how to comfort Jiwon. He knows how he’s feeling, he went through all of it before, but this one must hurt more. It’s his father after all. “I guess we’ll be staying in Seoul for a while then hyung…” Jiwon held Sunghoon’s hand. He felt grateful. Sunghoon knew he was going to stay for how could he leave his mother behind. “I guess we are… I’m sorry babe, I don’t know when we will back…” “Don’t worry about it hyung. We have a caretaker there in Jeju, he’ll look after our houses.” “Right… Thank you Hoonie-ah…
I really appreciate this…” “Yah… we promised each other right? We won’t leave each other’s side no matter what happens.” They made a pact when they started dating. They were best friends first before lovers, so even when they stopped seeing each other as lovers, they would remain best friends and always have each other’s back. That was their promise. And the way they sealed it was a constant reminder. They had identical tattoos on their shoulder, Sunghoon on his left, Jiwon on his right. A tattoo of hands clasped together, each one with their name on it.
“Arrayeo… still, I’m glad you’re here.” Jiwon then got up, and motioned for Sunghoon to follow him. “Where are we going hyung?” “You, I’m making you go home today. You must be tired waking up so early and preparing everything. Besides, I’m sure your parents would want to see you.” Sunghoon started to argue but Jiwon cut him off. “I know you want to stay with me and I would love that, but think of your parents. They haven’t seen you for months. Especially your mom. She seemed angry the last time you talked.” It was true. His mother was angry hearing the rumors about them. They weren’t exactly rumors though, but unlike Jiwon’s mom, his mother was totally against the idea of him being gay. They already had squabbles about him leaving training to live with Jiwon, he just managed to make them agree. “As for me I have to get home and get some clothes. I’m going to spend most of my time here so you can come by anytime.” “Ugggh…”Sunghoon pouted. “If my mom says anything bad about us, I’ll really run away hyung. You know what’s really strange is that my father’s not even against it. I thought it would be the other way around.” Jiwon smiled. Sunghoon always looked innocent when pouting he had to fight the urge to kiss him. “You can always run to me.” Sunghoon sighed… “I wish she can be accepting as your mom.” Jiwon wrapped a hand over Sunghoon’s shoulder and squeezed lightly. “You’re her son. She’ll eventually accept us.” Then flagging a taxi, he made sure that Sunghoon gets home by even saying the address to the driver. “Hyung, call me if you need anything arasseo?” “Of course,” then opening the door, he gestured for Sunghoon to get in but not before he whispered ‘I love you’ to his ear. Sunghoon smiled sweetly, waved at him and mouthed ‘Nadeu’ before closing the door. Little did both of them know that that was the last time they would see each other in a long while.
Sunghoon dreaded going home. He and his mom… well, let’s just say things are not going right between them. He wasn’t ready to face her, but Jiwon was right. If he could just convince her just how happy he is maybe she will let them be. He spent a minute collecting himself, before opening the door. His mom was in the kitchen preparing lunch. He quietly made his way there and stood awkwardly by the door. “Omma….”
Startled, his mom turned around and saw him standing there. “Sunghoon!! My gosh! I didn’t hear you come in, when did you arrive?” said his mom, while wiping her hands on her apron. “I just got here.” “Is there anything wrong?” “Nothing. I just accompanied Jiwon-hyung. Uncle’s in the hospital right now.” “Aah…right… I heard about it from Jiwon’s mother. It’s really sad. Anyway, since you’re here, take a rest first. I’ll call you when I’m done.” And upon saying that his mother busied herself with finishing her cooking. But Sunghoon noticed how uptight his mother was at the mention of Jiwon’s name and knew that they were far from finished talking about him.
Sunghoon has been wary all day of his mother. So when she came inside his room and told him they needed to talk did Sunghoon’s defenses go up.
Sunghoon’s mom seated herself in his chair, while Sunghoon stayed in his bed. “Tell me the truth Sunghoon. What is really going on between you and Jiwon?”
Sunghoon breathed deeply before answering. “Jiwon-hyung and I… you guessed right… we’re in a relationship…” “Have you gone completely crazy!?!?” His mother’s temper easily flaring up at the thought of him being gay. “There’s nothing wrong with it Mom!” Sunghoon defended. “Nothing?! Nothing?! Bicheosso?! You’re both men for Pete’s sake! Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?! Do you know how much shame you’ve put us in?” “Dad’s okay with it! Why is it so hard for you to accept us?” Sunghoon asked, hurt at his mother for being ashamed of him. “Your father’s blinded by his love for you! I love you too son, but I will not allow this preposterous relationship!” “Omma!” “You’re just 18! How do you know if you two are really meant to be? You’re still a minor. Right! Jiwon’s an adult now machi? I can get him sued for corrupting your mind…” At that, Sunghoon stood up and glared at his mother. He clenched his fists in anger. “Don’t you threaten him like that! Don’t you dare do that Mom if you don’t want to lose your son! Do you have any idea what Jiwon-hyung is going through right now?! I can’t believe you!” Her eyes shooting daggers at him, Sunghoon’s mother looked at him and stared him down. “Don’t think I wouldn’t do it Sunghoon.” she stated so firmly it was scary. “If that’s what it takes to separate you from Jiwon, then I’d gladly do it. I honestly believe you’re not thinking straight right now. Sit down and listen.” Still fuming, Sunghoon sat down, already on edge. His mom took a deep breath in order to calm herself but her voice still shook with raw emotion while she talked. “If you remember I was reluctant letting you stay in Jeju alone with Jiwon, but your father decided that for you. I told myself, fine, if it makes you happy I was okay with it. But I didn’t expect you to date him! Friends okay. Best friends okay. But boyfriend? That’s a totally different matter, one I will not allow even if you beg me to. I’m not gonna sit still and let you waste your youth living shamefully!” “There’s nothing shameful about it!…” “Shut up! I told you to listen! Now you will do as I say or I will send you to study abroad I swear I will!” Sunghoon clamped his mouth shut. His mom always made decisions for him which he hated. If she thought sending him abroad would be best for him, she would definitely do it.
And he hated his mom for that… His mom took another deep breath. “I’m not going to let you ruin your future over some stupid notion of love. I told you I’m not going to sit still. I know a recruiter with a prestigious agency. I showed her videos of your performances and she was pleased. She said you can start training with them as soon as you’re settled. So starting tomorrow, we’re going there and you’ll go back to your training.” “Omma, but I…” His mother held up a finger to silence him. “No buts. Also, give me your phone.” “What?” Sunghoon felt like he’s having his nightmares come true. “Your phone.” Sunghoon reluctantly handed her his phone.
“I’m confiscating this. While in training you can’t communicate with anyone else except us, your family, so that you could concentrate with training. You don’t need any other distractions. And by tomorrow, we are moving.” “Excuse me?” More nightmares. “We’re relocating nearer the agency. I found a great house there. It was convenient for your father too. And I’m going to enroll you in a school nearby.” “Are you imprisoning me?” Sunghoon asked out of spite. “No. I’m merely guiding you to the right path.” Sunghoon stayed quiet for a long time hating everything his mom told him. “Why do you hate us being together so much?” Sunghoon asked.
“Because it’s wrong! A man and a woman should be together, not man and man, or woman and woman. I don’t think I need to discuss right and wrong with you.”
“Omma…. Jiwon-hyung needs me right now.” Sunghoon couldn’t hide the worry in his voice despite his anger. Jiwon never showed his weakness to anyone, only him and he knew just how much Jiwon was suffering inside watching his father. “No.” his mom was adamant. “Jiwon is old enough to take care of himself so he doesn’t need anything from you. Don’t even try leaving this house Sunghoon. I’ll drag your ass back here if you so much as step a foot out the front door.” Sunghoon was furious. He wanted to talk to Jiwon but without his phone he was helpless. He tried their landline, but his mother was really something, she had all outgoing calls blocked. He kicked the chair his mom sat on, his resentment for her growing by the minute.
It’s already 10pm.
Jiwon found it strange that Sunghoon’s phone is unavailable every time he called so he tried their landline. No one answered. He was starting to worry. The last text he received from him was about him talking with his mother. After that, zilch. He knew how paranoid Sunghoon’s mom can be sometimes she might have taken his phone away. Just then a text came in.
This is Sunghoon’s mother. Jiwon, don’t get me wrong. I do appreciate your feelings for my son but it is something I find really hard to accept for let’s be practical. Please understand my position as a mother. I only want the best for him, a brighter future, and honestly, I don’t think he will have that with you… Please stay away from him. You are both still too young to know anything… Know that I’m doing this with good intentions. This is for both of you.
Stunned, Jiwon read the text again. That was why Sunghoon was unreachable. Jiwon sighed, his shoulders sagging. Things just got worse. He needed to hear even Sunghoon’s voice for comfort. His father slipped into a coma earlier that afternoon, and the doctors said they should prepare for the worst. He badly needed to lean on someone. He’s been acting strong for his mother but when alone he was mentally drained. He had too much on his mind. His mother had already told him everything. How he was to inherit the pension house in Hawaii his father had started. Hot tears fell when he knew the reason why. He once mentioned to his parents their plans about living in Hawaii, so his father built it for them as a gift. He must be the luckiest son in the world to have such supportive parents, completely the opposite of Sunghoon’s. He couldn’t wait to tell Sunghoon about it. It is their dream but that vanished, along with more sad news. His mom, too, had been keeping a secret. She too, is ill. She’s suffering from breast cancer stage 1. He didn’t know how much more he could take. His head felt like exploding from all the bad news. ‘When it rains, it pours.’ he thought miserably. If Sunghoon was there, he would at least be able to clear his mind and think logically but even his guardian angel was taken away from him. Jiwon had never felt so alone. For the first time in 20 years Jiwon broke down and cried.
The next day his father died.
On the same day, much to Sunghoon’s dismay, they moved. Everything went downhill for them after that.
2 weeks after
Sunghoon’s been missing Jiwon a lot. But something was definitely wrong. His mother may not give him a phone, but there’s always the mail. Jiwon had no e-mail so the only recourse left for Sunghoon was a letter. So as soon as they moved and his mom wasn’t overbearingly watchful of him, he wrote Jiwon a letter telling him how sorry he wasn’t there when he needed him. He told him of their new address, and that they should start using e-mail since his mom will absolutely read all letters addressed to him. But that was weeks ago, and Jiwon still hasn’t replied. At first he thought Jiwon got angry of him leaving without saying goodbye, but after 3 days passed and still no news, Sunghoon started to worry. Jiwon never got angry at him for that long. He started wondering if Jiwon received the letter. So he went to the post office on his free time and asked if there were any return mail. There was none.
Sunghoon’s getting restless. It’s unlike Jiwon to ignore him completely. He had to know for sure. So today he made an excuse to his mom about a project they were doing in school, but instead of going to school, Sunghoon would stop by Jiwon’s house. In front of Jiwon’s apartment building, Sunghoon’s heart beat rapidly. He was nervous. He didn’t know why. Arriving at Jiwon’s apartment, Sunghoon rang the bell. The door opened. “Yes? How can I help you?” A middle aged woman greeted him from the doorway. Sunghoon stuttered. “I…I’m sorry… I must have chosen the wrong apartment.” He then looked at the number, he was right. Puzzled, he asked. “Did you just move in?” “Aah… yes… We moved in 2 days ago. Were you looking for the previous owners?” Sunghoon nodded silently. “Aah… it’s a bit sad what happened to them. They actually moved a day before we settled.” Sunghoon had to ask… “Did you know where they moved? Did they leave an address in case someone looked for them?” he tried not to sound too hopeful. Surely, Jiwon would’ve left him a message. “Oh, I’m sorry. They said they were leaving the country to live abroad. They didn’t leave behind a note.” Sunghoon’s world came crashing down. Jiwon left him, without even saying goodbye. He bowed his thanks and apologized for disturbing them. He was in a daze. He couldn’t believe Jiwon left just like that, not even a note. He must have read his letter, he could have at least answered it. Sunghoon’s heart ached. He felt betrayed. He went home, feeling abandoned.
Days passed, Sunghoon’s feelings for Jiwon turned into resentment. He hated him for leaving. Sunghoon then decided not to dwell in the past. The memories of him and Jiwon he buried deep inside. Instead he concentrated all his energy on school and training. Months after graduating from high school, he debuted as a ballad singer.
His first song echoed his heartaches, and he sung it so well it catapulted him to stardom.
Chapter’s up!!! I cried while making Jiwon’s letter..😢😢😢 I can’t help but look forward to the next chapter even if I’m the one writing it.😂😂😂 I hope you enjoy this one too. Thank you for being patient.
Day 5 Hawaii
Sunghoon looked at the letter in his hand. He hasn’t been able to open it even after three days have passed. He kept himself busy, avoiding Jiwon by not staying at the hotel all day, made sure he was exhausted by the time he came back so he could just sleep.
He only had two more days before he went back to Korea. As for today, it’s movie marathon day. He decided to stay in and watch his favorite movies all day.
His phone rang. Sunghoon drops the letter on the bedside table and accepted the call.
“Nae Teppeunim?,” Sunghoon answered after checking who was calling.
“Sunghoon-ah, how’s Hawaii?”
“It’s amazing as I expected.”
“How are you?”
Sunghoon took it to mean he’s asking about his slump. As Sunghoon thought about it, he realized he can probably sing all day with all the raw emotions he’s been feeling lately.
“I’m better. I’ll be fine once I get back. How are the newcomers?”
And their conversation carried on for some time until..
“You know we actually got lucky with your hotel.”
Sunghoon actually thought it was the opposite but didn’t voice it out.
“Oh really, how’s that?”
“We actually picked that hotel since it’s owned by a Korean national. But the day after you checked in, they refunded everything we paid. We asked why and they said the owner was a fan. We managed to save a lot on accommodations.” chuckled his CEO.
Sunghoon sat up from the bed. “Jamkkanman… Did you ask who?”
Sunghoon was actually feeling nervous. If the hotel accommodations were free, the breakfast he received every day was also free, (and home-cooked too), just who was the owner of this hotel?
“Uh-huh.. But I forgot his name.. Aaah… It was Eun-something. Eun Chang….. no, no, Eun Shi… Eun Ji… what was his name again? It was Eun Ji-something”
Sunghoon found it hard to breathe, his whole body tense. He tried to clear his head, and asked tensely if the name was…
“Eun Ji Won?”
“Uh majja!! Eun Ji Won, that’s right. He’s really young too. He must be a big fan of yours. Do you know him? How could you guess it right?”
Sunghoon felt weak inside but he didn’t let his voice show it.
“No, I just thought about it randomly. Anyways, I should thank him.” Sunghoon said lightly.
“Yes you should. Give him a signed cd or something. I have to go Sunghoon-ah. Call me when you get back to Korea ok?” Then he hang up.
Sunghoon was more than stunned, he was bummed. He always wondered what Jiwon was doing in Hawaii, especially at the same hotel he was staying in. It turned out he ran this place. He didn’t just run it, he owned it. Sunghoon looked at the letter, now more curious than ever. But he decided he wasn’t ready. His mind now in chaos, Sunghoon decided to get some fresh air.
Jiwon laid a bouquet of white chrysanthemums on his father and mother’s tombs. They weren’t actually laid there, but Jiwon had them made, just a 100 meters from the back of the hotel, so he can remember. His mother died 2 years after his father. She refused to seek treatment, even when Jiwon begged her to. Jiwon sat facing the tomb and offered a short prayer.
“I miss you both every day.”
After staying for a while, Jiwon got up and strode back to the hotel, oblivious to the fact that someone watched him with sad eyes.
Sunghoon got out and made his way towards the beach, but the sun was scorching, it would be too hot to walk around there. He then proceeded to the side of the hotel where there was a garden, with a mini fountain in the center. A few benches were available for guests to lounge in so Sunghoon made his way towards the farthest bench, near the back of the hotel, where two palm trees provided enough shade. He sat down. Just then out of the corner of his eye, he saw a familiar back sitting, facing two erected gravestones.
He didn’t know what to do. He did say he would thank him, but he didn’t know how to approach. So he hid himself near the shade, and watched him from where he was.
After a long while, he saw him get up and went inside the hotel, not noticing where he was.
Sunghoon sighed, he couldn’t keep on avoiding him no matter how he tried. He couldn’t stay angry at him after all. What Jiwon said last time, it kept on ringing in his ears. Sunghoon would only lie if he insisted he didn’t feel the same. He couldn’t forget how Jiwon looked at him that night, like he was lost. It took all of his willpower to keep walking away, even when he wanted to run back to him.
Sunghoon stayed where he was until the sun set. He couldn’t deny it anymore. It’s about time he read the letter.
Sitting on the bed, Sunghoon’s hand trembled while opening the letter. Looking at Jiwon’s handwriting, he felt a sudden rush of emotions making it hard for him to breathe. He took a deep breath to calm himself, then started reading.
Jiwon sat in his cabana, watching the waves touching the shore. It’s been three days since he gave Sunghoon the letter, but Sunghoon hasn’t reached out to him.
‘Should I give up?’ he asked himself.
Maybe he should have given up years ago. If he didn’t have lingering feelings for Sunghoon, even seeing him or having him this close wouldn’t hurt this much. But who was he kidding…
Bruno Mars’ song quietly filled the cabana with his heart-wrenching lyrics…
“Tell me why, why can’t we try and start again… This can’t be how our story ends.. You’re more than my girl, you’re my bestfriend.. Tell me you remember when I was your man and you were my girl, it was you and me against the world baby..”
‘How fitting.’ Jiwon thought. The lyrics describes just how he’s feeling.
Sunghoon was furious. He couldn’t believe how stupid he was. He should’ve known better, should’ve have known who to trust. There was no one to blame for his stupidity but himself. But the tears kept coming.
Dialing a number on his phone, he tried to keep his voice calm. And tried to hide the fact that he was crying.
“Oh Sunghoon-ah.. what is it?” his father answered after a few rings.
“Abeoji…” Sunghoon took a deep breath. “Is Mom home?”
“Anniyeo, she’s attending a class reunion today. She’ll be gone for the next two days but she’ll be here when you get home. Why?”
“Can I ask you something? And please be honest with me.”
“You’re using a scary tone son. What’s wrong?”
“I just need to confirm something Dad. Please tell me the truth.”His voice was shaking. From anger or depression he didn’t know.
He heard his father sigh.. “Arrasseo.. what is it?”
“Did Jiwon-hyung really beg Mom to let him see me? Did he really wait in the rain outside for 2 days? He said you were there, you told him to just forget about me and go home? Is it true Dad?”
Sunghoon’s voice had risen an octave. His father was quiet on the other side.
“You weren’t home. That was the time you preferred sleeping at the agency rather than go home. I didn’t tell him to forget about you. I just told him to forget insisting on seeing you, not when your Mom was there watching.”
“Why are you so scared of her?” Sunghoon asked, bitterness laced his every word.
“Have you forgotten who her father is? I’m sorry Sunghoon. My hands are tied. If I go against your mom, I lose everything I worked so hard for all these years…”
“I see. You value your career more than the happiness of your family. Wow.. This is the first time I’m saying this, but I’m really ashamed to call you my parents.”
Sunghoon hung up without saying goodbye, tears flowing freely. It was his mom all along. He wasted 10 years of his life hating someone who never gave up on him. Sunghoon read the letter again, the paper already getting wet from his tears and wished he could turn back time.
I don’t know if you’ll ever read this but still I’m writing a letter I know you’ll never read.
It’s amazing that even after all this years I still feel the same. Every time I saw you on television, my heart would skip a beat. And then I’d miss you. I’d miss how we once were. I didn’t know where everything went wrong. One moment we were together, and then the next day you were gone.
I don’t know where to start. I feel that even if I explain myself nothing would be the same. You must be dating someone by now. After all you’re a celebrity.
Remember the last time we saw each other? I was really worried when you didn’t call or text me after you said you were having a talk with your mom. Then your mom texted me saying I should stay away from you. Your mom must really hate our relationship. I really wanted to talk you that time. You might think I’m selfish, but I needed the comfort of your voice. I couldn’t. I didn’t have any way to contact you. I’m sorry but I was so miserable that time. I just learned that my mom was sick with cancer, and my father slipped into a coma. I was falling apart, that’s why I needed you. I’m sorry.
My dad died the next day. His only wish was that his ashes be brought to Hawaii and scattered on the beach near the pension house where we were supposed to live. I did not get the chance to tell you about it. Did you know my father built a pension house for us in Hawaii? It’s because I once mentioned our plans to them. Isn’t he amazing? I sometimes wish your Mom or your Dad was like that. We would have been blessed, don’t you think?
Mom said we should leave for Hawaii as soon as all of Dad’s affairs were in order, which included moving, for all of our assets were transferred there already. But I insisted that I had to see you. I, at least, had to say goodbye properly and that I’ll come back for you. But for the first time Mom was adamant. I couldn’t say no. So we had to leave.
Mianhe Sunghoon-ah. I often wondered what if we were able to talk before I left, would we be still okay? All I was able to do was leave a letter, telling you where to call or write or email even. I waited a month for your answer, but there was none. I got worried so I asked my Mom a favor. I asked her to just give me a week to go home. I needed to see you Sunghoon. I needed to confirm something. She did agree, even when she needed me too, but she understood.
The moment I landed, I went to your house only to find out you also moved away. Is that what your Mom meant in her text? It scared me not knowing where to find you. Seoul is not small. I didn’t know where to begin Hoonie-ah. I literally felt walls crashing down on me. I really felt like I was losing you.
(Jiwon’s writing became unsteady, like he was in a rush to write the words).
I spent 2 days asking around near your neighborhood, hoping somebody would have an idea where you are, but there was none. It’s like you just disappeared. I was losing hope, so I did the only thing I was sure of. I went to your dad’s office. For sure he still worked in the same company. I hid near the building and waited for him to go home. I followed him by taxi. Finally I knew where you live. But it was late. So I came back the next day.
I rang the bell, but your mom wouldn’t open the door as soon as she saw my face. I waited Sunghoon-ah. I waited for two days hoping you would at least talk to me. Your mom kept saying you weren’t there but I didn’t believe her. I waited even if it rained, even when the night grew cold. I only ate at the store but I didn’t go home.
Finally after 2 days your father went out to talk to me saying that you really weren’t there. Saying you barely go home anymore since you spend most days at the agency. I didn’t even know you went back to training already. Then your mom went out of the house and screamed at me to get lost or she’ll call the police to come get me. Your father told her to get inside. He said he’ll be the one to talk to me.
Do you know how hurt I was when he told me to stop wanting to see you? He said I should just forget you.. I really thought your father was different.
When I got to the hotel where I was staying I was seriously broken. I cried the whole night. That was the first time I really felt that I’ve lost you.
I guess you must have really hated me for leaving, for you didn’t even answer my letter. You must have thought I went back on my promise to never leave you. I didn’t Sunghoon. I went back and I waited…
I wanted to stay longer, knowing that you would eventually come home. Then maybe I could talk to you before you went inside your house. But I couldn’t leave my mother alone for too long, so even if I wanted to stay, I couldn’t. I had to take care of my mom, too. So even if it pained me, I had to leave again without proper goodbye.
I stayed in Hawaii with Mom, renovating the pension house into a hotel, but the stress of running it must have taken its toll on her. Her condition worsened, but she didn’t want to undergo any treatment. She said it was a waste of time. Eventually, she too, left me. 2 years after Dad died, she joined him and I scattered her ashes in the same beach where Dad’s ashes lay.
I learned about your debut through the internet. You must have been really happy you finally achieved your dream. I was proud of you too, even if i meant nothing.
Of course, years had passed. You continued being successful. I knew you already forgot about me but I didn’t. I never did. Maybe it’s because we never had proper closure. 7 long years passed after that and I still couldn’t get over you. I tried forgetting you but nothing worked. I dated and flirted with girls but not one of them made me feel different.
So can you imagine how surprised I was to see you here? At first I thought I was hallucinating. But you were really here. But you ignored me, totally, and treated me like a stranger. I don’t blame you, but still, it hurt.
So I did the only thing I could, to let you stay free.
I called your agency and informed them that we were refunding them what they paid for your accommodations. When they asked why, I just told them that I was Korean too, and that I’m a big fan of yours.
I told my staff not to tell you who owns the hotel, for I feared you would leave and transfer if you knew. It didn’t matter, though. You weren’t the least curious. You didn’t even ask about the breakfast I cook for you every day. But still, as long as you were satisfied with our services that was fine.
I’ve thought long and hard every day since you got here how I should ask for forgiveness from you, but since you avoid me I never could find the chance. So, even if I knew you wouldn’t read this, I wrote my apology in a letter.
I’m sorry Hoonie-ah. I broke my promise to you, but please know that was never my intention. I want you to know my feelings for you never changed, and I don’t think they ever will. I loved you then, and I love you still.
All I ask is for your forgiveness.
Sunghoon chastised himself for being such an idiot. He should be the one to apologize. He was the one who abandoned him, not the other way around. How Jiwon must have suffered by himself all these years. He remembered how Jiwon looked at him while he gave the letter, and his heart broke. All the pain he kept in his heart was nothing compared to what Jiwon went through.
Sunghoon couldn’t stop crying for a while…
After an hour he finally managed to calm himself. He had to set things right. He had to apologize. Jiwon shouldn’t ask for his forgiveness, he should be the one doing that.
He had to find him, though. So he called the reception, and asked if he could talk to the owner.
“I’m sorry, Sir. Business hours start at 9:00 in the morning until 6:00 in the evening. If you have concerns regarding hotel accommodations, I’d be pleased to assist you.”
“Please…” Sunghoon begged, trying to keep his voice steady. “This is Kang Sunghoon from Room 205. I need to speak to him immediately. It’s personal.”
“Aah.. Mr. Kang… just a minute Sir, I would have to ask for permission.”
“Just tell me where his office is, I’ll go there myself.”
Suddenly, a different voice can be heard on the line.
“Good evening Mr. Kang, this is Monica Webber, Mr. Eun’s secretary. He’s not at the office right now. Shall I take a message for you?”
“You don’t understand. I need to speak to him now it’s urgent and personal. Please just tell me where I can find him.”
Monica cleared her throat. “If it’s really that personal, Sir, then I shall help you. But please, don’t mention to him that I told you.”
“Don’t worry I won’t,” said Sunghoon his heart beating so fast he could barely breathe.
“Mr. Eun likes to spend most nights by the beach. You see the cabana there? He stays there for a long time. I saw him go that direction a while ago and I believe he’s still there.”
“Thank you! Thank you!”, and Sunghoon hung up the phone.
Grabbing his jacket, he hastened downstairs towards the beach, oblivious of his surroundings, the letter still in his hands. He only had Jiwon in his mind, so he set out towards the cabana, his steps growing lighter as he approached, his only purpose was to set things right.
Chapter 7: What Matters Most
Chapter 7 is up. Sorry guys it took me longer than I intended. I got quite busy with work for I had to meet deadlines. I hope this chapter was worth the wait. Thank you for reading and subscribing. Please don’t forget to vote!!! Enjoy!!! 😁😁
Jiwon thought he was dreaming. Standing in front of him was Sunghoon… He shook his head and closed his eyes, trying to clear his mind, and pinched himself to make sure he wasn’t.
He opened his eyes again and saw Sunghoon still standing there.
“H…hyung… I’m so sorry…”
Sunghoon’s eyes were brimming in tears. He flung himself at Jiwon, hugging him tightly. Broken sobs can be heard as his shoulders shook while he hugged Jiwon.
Jiwon was frozen for a minute but immediately collected himself and hugged Sunghoon back just as tightly. His heart swelled. He gently stroked Sunghoon’s back, shushing him quietly…
“Hoonie-ah… uljima jebal.. I hate it when you cry.. kumanhaeyo..”
Sunghoon couldn’t. He felt like all his resentment of Jiwon over the past years were the tears that flowed freely. He kept saying sorry over and over, his voice barely heard over the sobs rocking his body.
“Hoonie-ah.. please..” Jiwon tried to free himself from Sunghoon’s hug but he clung to him even tighter. He had no choice but to wait for him to calm down, so he just kept on stroking his back, much like how a father comforts a son. They stayed that way for a long time before Sunghoon finally stopped.
Sunghoon managed to calm himself down after a long while. They both sat down at the cabana, neither speaking a word until…
“I take it you already read everything.” said Jiwon, breaking the silence.
Sunghoon looked solemnly at Jiwon… “Hyung, I’m really…”
Jiwon held up a finger on Sunghoon’s lips, shushing him. The mere touching of Sunghoon’s lips to his skin sent tingles up Jiwon’s spine, one he hasn’t felt in a long time. He removed his finger, and held both of Sunghoon’s hands.
“Stop apologizing Hoonie… I never blamed you..”
“I feel like such an idiot… And I wasn’t there when you needed me most. I’m the one who broke my promise, not you. I was angry at you for nothing…”
“You have every right to be angry. After all I did leave you behind.”
“No hyung. I misunderstood. I was immature. I let my emotions run my thoughts. I’m so sorry for everything. I’ve put you through so much, you suffered so much..” Sunghoon’s voice broke and the tears started falling again.
Jiwon took Sunghoon’s face in his hands and wiped his tears away. “I hate it when you cry. Jjinja shiro”
Sunghoon looked at Jiwon intently, sniffing slightly, eyes still brimming with tears. He took a deep breath.
“Do you not hate me hyung.?”
“I never did.”
“Because I love you.” came the simple reply.
Sunghoon leaned and rested his head against Jiwon’s shoulder, his heart swelled upon hearing Jiwon’s confession. He no longer cared about what happened. What matters most is that they’re finally together. Jiwon then encircled one arm on Sunghoon’s shoulder and squeezed lightly.
“I never stopped loving you, hyung… That was why I avoided you as much as I can, I was scared. Scared that if I got too close, I would end up running back to you, and then I’d get hurt again. Thinking about it now, I was really stupid. I ended up wasting time when we could have been together sooner.” Sunghoon explained wistfully.
Jiwon grew quiet. Sunghoon looked up at Jiwon wondering why he was silent.
“Something wrong, hyung?”
Jiwon looked at Sunghoon intently then quietly asked, “Do you have to go back to Korea?”
The suggestion beneath the question didn’t go unnoticed by Sunghoon.
“You know you can stay in Hawaii for 90 days without a Visa.” Jiwon continued. “I would love for you to stay.”
“I would like that too, but…”
“I know, I know… you don’t have to say it…” Jiwon sighed deeply. He knew Sunghoon had matters to take care of. It pained him greatly that he won’t be able to spend as much time with him as he wanted. He, too, couldn’t leave Hawaii that easily. Thinking about them being separated again gave him a headache.
Sunghoon then kneeled in front of Jiwon, then reached out to cup his face in his hands.
“Hyung, I know what you’re thinking. It’s different this time. I’m going back because I need to, not because I want to, but I’ll come back here. Once I’ll settle everything there I’ll fulfill my promise to you.”
Jiwon sighed. “I know, that was too much for me to ask I’m sorry.”
“You have every right to ask that of me. I should be the one ashamed that I can’t grant it.”
Sunghoon then leaned in closer, his face just inches away from Jiwon’s. Jiwon’s eyes widened, clearly taken aback, but he didn’t move away.
“Hyung, can you wait for me just a bit more? I feel horrible asking this of you, but please , just a bit more.. then I’ll never leave you. I swear.”
For the first time in a long while, Jiwon smiled. Sunghoon thought he looked years younger with that smile. His heart swelled, and he smiled back at Jiwon.
“Of course, I’ll wait for you. I’ll always do.”
Then he leaned forward and captured Sunghoon’s lips in a soft kiss.
Sunghoon couldn’t remember the last time he felt like this with just a kiss. Every part of him felt alive, as if he just woke up from a deep slumber. He kissed him back just as fervently, their desire for each other imminent after years of being apart. Jiwon pulled him up from his kneeling position then laid his back on the cabana so that Sunghoon was on top of him. He didn’t stop kissing, his one hand on Sunghoon’s neck, his other hand on Sunghoon’s waist. He started slowly, nibbling slightly on Sunghoon’s lower lip, feeling its softness against his. Then he would slide his tongue over Sunghoon’s lip, teasing, tasting, slightly flicking his tongue over it, then capturing Sunghoon’s lips again in a kiss.
Sunghoon let out a moan. He missed this. He missed the softness of Jiwon’s lips, so this time he took control. As Jiwon slightly opened his mouth, Sunghoon slid his tongue inside, searching, probing, till he found Jiwon’s tongue and slowly circled his own over it. It was Jiwon’s turn to moan. Passionate desire erupted and filled Sunghoon’s veins like flowing lava, and he deepened the kiss, wanting more, drowning himself with Jiwon’s taste.
Jiwon broke off the kiss, catching his breath. Sunghoon laid his head on Jiwon’s chest, his breathing as ragged as Jiwon’s and felt the rapid beating of his heart.
“Hoonie-ah…” said Jiwon huskily.
“Let’s go back… It’s getting pretty cold out here.” In all honesty, Jiwon doesn’t feel the cold air at all. His body was burning with desire, but the cabana, though most of it hidden from view, was still situated in an open space. And Jiwon was worried someone might see them. He actually didn’t care if people saw them, he just didn’t want to be disturbed.
Sunghoon couldn’t hide his disappointment. They were just getting started. His lips formed into a pout, which didn’t go unnoticed by Jiwon. He chuckled, kissing Sunghoon lightly.
“Arasseo hyung,” said Sunghoon, so he slowly got up, Jiwon following suit.
Jiwon wrapped an arm across Sunghoon’s shoulder and guided him towards the hotel.
“Where are we going hyung?” asked Sunghoon as he walked with Jiwon, his arm around Jiwon’s waist.
“My room, where else… I plan on finishing what we started.” he replied nonchalantly.
Sunghoon’s every nerve tingled with excitement at those words.
Instead of going through the hotel, they took a different path Sunghoon wasn’t aware off. To the left of the hotel was a pathway leading to a modest house hidden by palm trees. It was a modernized bungalow-type cottage, bermuda grass decorating the yard. But as it was dark, Sunghoon couldn’t focus on the house since Jiwon’s arms tightened around him.
Jiwon opened the door and ushered Sunghoon inside. As soon as Jiwon closed the door, he turned Sunghoon around to face him, no longer bothering with the lights, and kissed Sunghoon fervently, his desire for him exploding. Sunghoon kissed him back.
Jiwon felt drunk. Sunghoon’s presence filled all of his senses. He tugged at Sunghoon’s clothes, wanting no barrier between them and felt Sunghoon doing the same. Jiwon broke the kiss to remove his shirt, gesturing for Sunghoon to do the same.
Sunghoon’s hands trembled as he took his jacket and shirt off.
Jiwon turned on the lights, surprising Sunghoon, their half naked bodies suddenly visible.
“Wae?” Sunghoon asked simply, stepping closer to Jiwon.
“I want to see you. I want you to look at me while I make love to you.” then grabbing Sunghoon’s waste, Jiwon angled his head and gently traced soft kisses on Sunghoon’s neck. “I don’t think we’ll make it to my room.” Jiwon whispered against his neck, all the while trailing kisses making Sunghoon grab his hair gently, a soft moan escaping his lips.
Jiwon gently slid his hand from Sunghoon’s chest towards his waist stopping at the waistband of his shorts, and tugged it downward. Sunghoon freed one hand hugging Jiwon and helped him remove the clothing, leaving Sunghoon clad in nothing but his underwear. Jiwon kissed Sunghoon deeply, pushing him harder against the door, his thumb making slow circles on Sunghoon’s navel, heightening the pleasure, till he slid his hand down and stroked Sunghoon through the thin piece of cloth that still protected him. Jiwon cupped Sunghoon in his hand and stroked gently, making Sunghoon moan against his mouth, the sound driving Jiwon’s desire on edge.
Sunghoon loved the feel Jiwon’s hand was making. He took off his briefs, tugging them down, and with Jiwon’s help, removed them completely. He was fully aroused, and Jiwon’s warm hand enveloped him and started stroking him up and down making him dizzy with desire, his knees going weak.
Just when Sunghoon thought he couldn’t take anymore, Jiwon’s lips left his and started travelling downward.
“Uhmmm… h..hyung.” Sunghoon mumbled breathlessly.
Jiwon stopped kissing Sunghoon for a while and guided him towards the couch. Once there, Sunghoon sat down with a grateful sigh, knowing his knees were about to give away from the sensual teasing Jiwon was doing. Jiwon chuckled softly knowing exactly what that sigh meant.
Positioning himself in front of Sunghoon, he resumed kissing him once more, hot sensual kisses trailing downward, his one hand leading, his lips following where his hand had been. He could hear Sunghoon’s breathing grow ragged, occassional moans escaping his lips while his hand grabbed his hair gently. Jiwon wanted to taste every inch of Sunghoon’s milky white skin, so he kissed and licked his way downward, until he reached…
Sunghoon took a sharp intake of breath when he felt Jiwon’s tongue slowly lick the tip of his cock, his penis pulsing at the sudden onslaught of Jiwon’s tongue. He groaned with pleasure, grabbing a fistful of Jiwon’s hair in his hand, loving the feel of Jiwon’s tongue on him.
Jiwon slowly circled his tongue on Sunghoon’s cock, loving the taste of it, licking him up, down, teasing gently, while Sunghoon moaned with pleasure. He continued teasing Sunghoon for a while until he finally took him into his mouth, and started sucking him up and down, his tongue and mouth working in unison to satisfy Sunghoon.
Sunghoon’s moans of pleasure could be heard against the quiet house. Jiwon’s mouth was sending him into waves of pleasure he never experienced before. They never got this far when they were in Jeju. This was a first for both of them, but Jiwon was neither hesitant nor grossed out by the thought of tasting him. His heart swelled, further fuelling his desire.
Jiwon knew Sunghoon was nearing his limit by the gentle tug on his hair. Sunghoon didn’t want to come into his mouth, but Jiwon didn’t mind. He wanted all of Sunghoon. But knowing Sunghoon, he’ll probably be embarassed about it so Jiwon removed his mouth from Sunghoon, giving the tip one last suck, then squeezed him gently with his hand. A moan escaped as Sunghoon shuddered his release.
He reached out for Jiwon, wanting to feel him close, and locked his arms around him. He was spent, his energy depleted, but apparently Jiwon wasn’t finished. Jiwon gently nibbled on his earlobe and softly whispered, “Spread your legs for me Hoonie-ah.”
Sunghoon thought he couldn’t take anymore but when Jiwon whispered in his ear, his senses perked up once more, desire burning hot inside him. He took Jiwon’s lips into his, their tongues meeting in fervent passion as Sunghoon did as he was asked, while Jiwon positioned himself on top of him. Jiwon broke off the kiss to take his shorts off and Sunghoon helped him get rid of his remaining clothing, their hands urgent. Jiwon’s cock sprang free and Sunghoon marveled at the sight of Jiwon’s naked body in front of him. He reached down to stroke him, and Jiwon closed his eyes, loving the warmth Sunghoon’s hand gave. Sunghoon pulled Jiwon down, kissing him hard, their passion unchecked. Jiwon kissed him back, and gently removing Sunghoon’s hand from his, he positioned his cock right into Sunghoon’s opening. Jiwon hesitated. They’ve never done this before. He didn’t want to hurt Sunghoon, even when his body and mind was screaming at him to do it. He broke off the kiss and looked at Sunghoon, the question lingering in his eyes.
Sunghoon smiled at Jiwon, fully knowing what he meant. He gently laid a hand on his face, and kissed him. “It’s all right, hyung..” he whispered against Jiwon’s lips. He would give anything Jiwon wanted. He owed him that much. He loved him that much.
Jiwon must have been reading his thoughts for he whispered, “I love you Hoonie-ah.”
And with that he plunged into Sunghoon hard, making him cry out, the pain bringing tears into his eyes. Jiwon stopped, but Sunghoon kissed him saying he was okay.
Sunghoon didn’t care about the pain. He wanted to satisfy Jiwon the way he did to him. He closed his eyes, and hugged Jiwon tightly, thrusting his hips towards Jiwon in a welcoming gesture.
It was Jiwon’s turn to moan. Sunghoon’s gesture of acceptance made him more aroused, and he started pumping into him, slowly, gently, till Sunghoon met him with every thrust, Sunghoon holding his cock in between them, fully aroused, as he slammed into him again and again, their bodies in perfect rhythm, the silence of the night broken only by their moans of pleasure, until they both reached their limit and Jiwon spilled himself inside of Sunghoon, filling him up, Sunghoon coming into Jiwon’s stomach.
Jiwon shuddered and hugged Sunghoon tightly, pinning his body down, his breathing uneven. Sunghoon held him tightly, reveling in the feel of Jiwon’s body this close to him. They stayed that way until Jiwon spoke softly.
“Let’s go to bed Hoonie-ah.”
Standing up, he slowly dislodged himself from Sunghoon, and held out his hand. Sunghoon took it and stood up, and together they made their way towards Jiwon’s bedroom, the clothes they were wearing lay abandoned on the floor.
They didn’t sleep though. They spent the entire night making love, only managing to rest in the early hours of dawn.
Sunghoon woke up to the rays of the sunshine streaming into the room, Jiwon’s hand gingerly placed on his waist, like it belonged there. Sunghoon smiled. He’d never woken up to this feeling in a long time, a feeling of content and peace. He was really happy. It was always like this when they were together. He realized just how much he missed Jiwon. He kissed him gently and whispered “I love you” softly into his ear before getting up and making his way into the bathroom.
Jiwon was still sleeping when Sunghoon finished. He smiled. He must have tired Jiwon out.
He went out of bedroom to find the kitchen. Jiwon had diligently prepared his breakfast all the time he was staying at the hotel. He wanted to return the favor, and vowed that when they are together, he’d prepare Jiwon’s breakfast for him everyday. The thought brought a smile to Sunghoon’s lips. He felt like a wife.
He only wished he had more time to spend with Jiwon but he had only one day left. Tomorrow he was going back, and he dreaded the thought of leaving Jiwon again. But he had to. He had lots of things to do. He knew his agency president would be furious, but his contract would be ending anyway, so there was no problem with that at least. But what bothers him was his parents. He had a score to settle with them, and Sunghoon didn’t know if he could keep calm when he talked to them.
But he brushed it aside. He’ll think about them when the time comes. For now, he would enjoy every damn minute he could and spend it with Jiwon. He wanted to make up for all the lost time they had, and he vowed to never leave Jiwon’s side again. So he set out to finishing his breakfast, then returned to the bedroom to wake Jiwon up, where he knew his heaven awaited.
Chapter 8: Love with no Bounds
Sunghoon sat beside Jiwon’s naked sleeping body on the bed, wondering whether to wake him up for breakfast. But noticing how peaceful Jiwon looked while sleeping, he decided against disturbing him. Instead he sat there, just looking at him, memorizing every contour of his face, drinking in the glorious sight. He slowly reached out to move tendrils of his hair away from his eyes, but the small gesture woke Jiwon.
Jiwon sleepily reached out a hand and groped beside him. Sensing that Sunghoon wasn’t there, he slowly opened his eyes, adjusting to the bright room, and saw Sunghoon sitting beside him by the bed. At first he thought he was seeing an angel, what with the sunlight streaming in, enveloping Sunghoon in white light, his blond hair reflecting most of it that Jiwon thought he had a halo.
Jiwon smiled up at Sunghoon, then reached out both hands and hugged him by the waist as he was still lying down.
“Good morning angel…”said Jiwon, his voice muffled as his face was buried in Sunghoon’s stomach.
Sunghoon smiled softly, suddenly feeling warm.
“Good morning honey. Time for breakfast.”
Jiwon snuggled up to Sunghoon, leveling himself and kissing him full on the lips.
“I was actually planning on spending all day with you in bed..” Jiwon whispered playfully.
Sunghoon laughed, masking the tingles that went up and down his spine as Jiwon said those words. “Hmmm… I’d like that. But can’t we eat first? I think we both need the energy…” Sunghoon whispered back.
Jiwon’s smile widened, his eyes twinkling. He sat up fully, faced Sunghoon and hugged him gently. Then he kissed him on the cheek saying, “I love you so much.”
Sunghoon hugged Jiwon back tightly, “I love you more,” he whispered, his throat tight with emotions. Then collecting himself, “Let’s eat hyung. The food’s getting cold.”
After breakfast and showering, Jiwon called up his secretary and told her that he’s taking the next 2 days off. He wanted to spend Sunghoon’s last 2 days of stay with him. He didn’t want to think negatively, after all they just got back together, but who knows when Sunghoon will be back. It might take months or years again and he knew the wait will kill him so he plans to spend as much time with him as he can.
After a few more reminders for his secretary, Jiwon finished the call and saw Sunghoon quietly reading on the bed. He was re-reading the letter again. Jiwon made his way towards the bed and lied down next to him.
“You should stop reading that, you know. It’s depressing.” he said, as he grabbed the letter gently away from Sunghoon and placed it on the bedside table. Sunghoon smiled at him. “I know. I love your handwriting, though.”
Jiwon chuckled, as he caressed Sunghoon’s cheek with his finger. “I’ll write you a happier one.”
Sunghoon smiled sweetly at him. And it was the smile that shattered Jiwon’s restraint. He swooped down to kiss Sunghoon hard, desire exploding in his veins. Somehow, he couldn’t get enough of him. Sunghoon, though must have been feeling the same, as he returned his kiss with equal passion, and before they knew it they were both naked already. Jiwon manouvered himself on the bed, so that Sunghoon had his back towards him. He hugged him from behind, his hands coming up to Sunghoon’s chest, gently caressing his nipples, then trailed kisses on his shoulders, making him rock hard. He kissed Sunghoon’s tattoo, and smiled.
“I honestly thought you had this removed.” Jiwon said huskily, his lips still trailing kisses, this time on Sunghoon’s neck. “I’m glad you didn’t.”
Sunghoon moaned in response, feeling Jiwon’s hardness pressing down on him, his lips tickling his neck in such delicious manner. Half-dazed with desire, he grabbed Jiwon’s one hand, and guided it towards his cock, already fully aroused by Jiwon’s foreplay.
“Hyung…. please…” Sunghoon pleaded inaudibly.
Jiwon barely heard him, but Sunghoon’s plea didn’t go unnoticed. Jiwon knew what Sunghoon wanted for he felt the same. Jiwon adjusted himself to the right position, and soon both of them went soaring on clouds of pleasure.
Jiwon came first, his body shuddering and growing limp against Sunghoon’s. His breathing was ragged, and he felt sated.
Sunghoon, though, felt deprived. Jiwon noticed it and smiled at him, then rolled onto his back, and motioned for Sunghoon to get on top of him.
Sunghoon looked at him, puzzled.
Jiwon smiled, guiding him gently on top of him, and kissing him languidly, slowly, until Sunghoon felt delirious. Jiwon spread his own legs for him, to give Sunghoon better access. Still kissing Sunghoon, he whispered against his lips…
Sunghoon didn’t hesitate.
It was starting to get dark. Sunghoon was still smiling to himself while he waited for Jiwon outside the house. He’s having a perfect day. After spending hours in bed, they decided to have dinner outside. They took a shower together, and Sunghoon couldn’t remember the last time he spent almost 2 hours just for a shower. Maybe because they’ve been apart too long, their desire for each other was clearly fuelled with longing.
Jiwon got out of the house, and took Sunghoon’s hand in his, guiding him to the car. Once seated, Jiwon set out for a restaurant he personally likes wanting Sunghoon to at least have a taste of Hawaii’s delicacy. They didn’t take long having dinner, though. Jiwon wanted to spend Sunghoon’s last night by the beach, enjoying the stars and probably watch the sunrise together. He had something to do, and the thought makes him nervous.
Jiwon grew quiet as they neared the beach. Sunghoon knew why. Tomorrow will be his flight back to Korea. Jiwon was probably thinking of being left alone again.
Sunghoon reached out to hold his hand, wanting to comfort him. Jiwon squeezed his hand and held it tightly until they reached the beach. As they alighted from the car, they walked hand in hand towards the cabana Jiwon owned.
Jiwon was practically nervous. He wanted to say things right, but his nervousness might ruin everything he planned. He just wished Sunghoon would be happy.
Sitting side by side in the cabana, they watched while the moon and stars kissed the sea and the sound of the waves crashing onto the shore was the only thing heard. Sunghoon liked the peace. He felt whole, like Jiwon’s presence in his life was the only factor missing. He held his hand, and laid his head on his shoulder like the way they used to back in Jeju.
“This reminds me of Jeju.” Jiwon said, breaking the silence. Sunghoon nodded, suddenly reminiscing the number of times they would simply sit by the beach.
“I kind of miss it, but you’re here now, that’s what matters.”
“Me too…” Jiwon answered back while planting a kiss on Sunghoon’s forehead.
They were quiet for a while, just watching the waves rush to shore.
“What time is your flight tomorrow?” Jiwon asked reluctantly after a bout of silence.
“I had it rescheduled to the last flight. It’s 3 in the afternoon.” Sunghoon answered not needing to say he wants more time with Jiwon as much as he can.
Sunghoon then sat up and turns to face Jiwon.
“Hyung… I know what you’re thinking…”
“No you don’t…”
“I do..” Then taking Jiwon’s face in his hands he said simply, “I’m not going to abandon you..” and kissed him lightly.
Jiwon smiled at him, gently tapping Sunghoon’s nose with a finger. “You really don’t know. That wasn’t what I was thinking about.”
Sunghoon looked at him confusedly. “Then why have you been so quiet on the drive back?”
Jiwon took Sunghoon’s hands in his and gave them a squeeze. Then he let go of it and rummaged in his pocket. He then took out a small blue box, and smiled at Sunghoon, his mouth slightly twitching. He was clearly nervous.
“I was actually thinking of how to give this to you. I guess I don’t need any fanfares.” Then he handed the box to Sunghoon.
This… I want you to wear it always. I want you to remember that I’ll be waiting for you.”
Sunghoon knew what was in the box, but his voice seemed to have left him.
“It’s a pair actually..”
Sunghoon slowly opened the box, his hand trembling. Seeing what was inside, he took a sharp breath.
A beautiful silver ornate ring glowed inside. It mesmerized Sunghoon. He likes silver a lot more than gold.
“You said it’s a pair?” Sunghoon managed to ask after a while.
Jiwon took out his necklace, the ring serving as a pendant. He then took out another box, this time revealing a necklace of the same chain he was wearing.
“There’s something inscribed on the inside, take a look.” Jiwon urged Sunghoon.
Sunghoon took out his phone to serve as light and read the inscription.
‘My heart’s forever yours‘
Sunghoon felt choked up with emotion, his heart filling up with happiness. He felt like he just got proposed to. Jiwon’s simple gesture of love spoke a thousand words for them.
Jiwon then gently took the ring from him, slid it neatly into the chain and fastened it around Sunghoon’s neck.
“I’ll wait for you.” he said to Sunghoon, his eyes looking intently at him.
Sunghoon hugged him tightly, his eyes shining. “I love you…” he whispered to Jiwon.
Jiwon hugged him back just as tightly.
“I love you more.” was Jiwon’s reply.
Sunghoon broke off from the embrace and smiled sheepishly at Jiwon.
“I really thought you were gonna propose when I saw the ring.”
Jiwon chuckled heartily. He caressed Sunghoon’s face with his finger. “You can think of it as an indirect proposal. ”
Sunghoon smiled brightly at Jiwon and that was all the answer Jiwon needed.
They stayed there the whole night and come morning, they watched the beautiful sunrise together.
Jiwon drove Sunghoon to the airport the next day, his heart heavy. He held Sunghoon’s hand tightly, even while he was driving.
Even when they got to the airport, Jiwon never let go of Sunghoon’s hand. Sunghoon didn’t mind. He didn’t want to let go of him.
Time seemed to go by so fast for Jiwon.
The airport intercom blared out the call for passengers bound for Incheon to proceed to the gates for departure.
Jiwon faced Sunghoon and kissed him on the lips. Then they hugged each other.
“I’ll come back, hyung. I promise.”
“I know you will.” Jiwon answered him. “I’ll be waiting for you.” Jiwon assured him.
And even though they both didn’t want to be apart, their hearts and minds are lighter than before.
Jiwon sent off Sunghoon with a kiss goodbye knowing for sure that Sunghoon will come back to him, the ring in his chest a symbol of love and hope.
He will wait…
Sunghoon knew that his heart will be left here. He knew he had to come back to retrieve it. He would not allow them to be apart for the second time. So with that in mind, he boarded the plane bound for Korea, but not before planting a kiss on Jiwon’s lips (which he will surely miss), resolved to fix everything that stands in the way of their happiness.
Chapter 9: Tying Loose Ends
Sunghoon arrived at the airport at around 8 in the evening. Making his way out of the arrival area, he was caught off guard by the sudden flashes of cameras as soon as he stepped out the door. For a minute he forgot he was already in Korea, until his manager came towards him and whisked him away to safety. Sunghoon politely refused questions directed at him when they passed by the reporters. His heart, mind and body is still in Hawaii, so he refused to say anything incriminating.
They managed to manouver themselves out of the endless cameras and microphones shoved into their faces and safely made it to their van. Sunghoon sighed heavily, leaning against the chair.
“You seem tired..” his manager noted.
“Just from the flight, hyung. It was long. I couldn’t sleep that well.”
Actually Sunghoon couldn’t sleep thinking about the pending confrontation with his mom.
‘I’ll take you home then so you could rest.”
“Anieyo, take me to my parents’ house hyung. It’s nearer. Leave my bags in the van though, I don’t plan to stay there long.”
Puzzled, Jin Hyuk looked at Sunghoon. He hasn’t gone to see his parents ever since his debut so he wondered why Sunghoon would want to go there now, but he kept mum and drove towards Sunghoon’s old house, needing the help of the GPS to guide him.
Sunghoon, on the other hand, looked out the window at the night sky, thinking hard. It must still 1am in Hawaii right now. He missed Jiwon already. And he gets stressed knowing he’ll have to settle the past with his mom. He hated how narrow-minded she is, especially about Jiwon but he knew he couldn’t give up now, especially after learning the truth. He owed it to his honey. Tentatively, he touched the ring hanging from the necklace upon his chest, immediately feeling calm. He made a promise, and this time he’s keeping it.
Sunghoon stood by the front door, taking deep breaths. He hasn’t been home in 7 years, ever since debut, only talking to his mom over the phone, and visiting his dad at the office. But after their last conversation, even his dad’s presence might irritate him. Still, he needed to talk to them, or at least his mom. It felt like he wanted justice.
Entering the house, it was relatively quiet, the lights off. His mom might be out, having gone to the mart or meet with friends. His dad said his mom goes out often after his debut, hating staying alone in the house.
Sunghoon made his way inside, towards his bedroom, where he noted nothing has changed at all. It seemed his mom kept it clean all these years. He plopped down on his bed, and took out his phone to call Jiwon.
Sunghoon instantly brightened up upon seeing Jiwon on screen, his handsome face beaming.
“Hi honey..” Sunghoon greeted with a smile.
All the stress he felt coming home flew out the window as soon as Jiwon smiled back at him.
“Hi there babe. Did you just arrive? Eodisseo?”
“Yap… I’m at my parents’ house..”
“Huh you did tell me you were going but I expected you’ll be there tomorrow… and what did they say when you arrived?”
“No one’s home yet.”
“I guess they didn’t change the passcode if you got in so easily.. Have you eaten?”
“I’m not really hungry.”
Jiwon smiled sheepishly. “Well I am. And… you look extra delicious right now.” he teased.
Instantly, Sunghoon felt warm. “Aigoo… what I’d give just to be with you right now.” he sighed heavily. “I miss you already…”
“Me too…” Jiwon sighed, reaching out to touch the screen, as if he could touch Sunghoon, making Sunghoon smile. “You should have dinner, Hoonie-ah.”
“Don’t stress about it too much..”
Sunghoon knew Jiwon meant the pending conversation with his mom. He must have seen it on his face. He knew him too well.
“I can’t help it. Now that I’m here, I can’t help getting angry.”
“Ya… You know it doesn’t matter to me right? Just as long as I have you…”
“I know, hyung. But still, I need to get this out..”
“Eat first then take a rest. You can talk to her tomorrow when your mind’s at ease.”
“Arasseo, but honestly hyung, I never felt comfortable in this house.”
“You know, you should really stop calling me hyung..” Jiwon changed the subject, trying to lighten up the mood.
“Then what? I like it though, I’m used to it. Should I call you Oppa? Would you like that?”
Jiwon laughed. Sunghoon calling him oppa seemed preposterous that even Sunghoon chuckled.
“I like honey better.” Jiwon smirked.
It was Sunghoon’s turn to laugh. “Honey? I didn’t know you had such romantic side to you..” he teased.
“Ya! I’ve always been romantic..” Jiwon protested.
Sunghoon simply nodded, but his smile was definitely brighter than before. “Ara, ara..”
Just then, Sunghoon heard the front door open.
He stiffened, “Ahhh… I think Mom’s home..”
“Cham… I’ll call you later then. Eat then rest okay? I love you.”
“I love you more..” Sunghoon answered back, blowing Jiwon a kiss. Jiwon caught it and brought it to his heart then did the same for him. Sunghoon smiled once more.
He reluctantly ended the call, feeling suddenly empty. Jiwon seemed to be the only bright aspect in his life right now. He breathed deeply and waited a few more minutes before going out to meet his mom. He felt awkward. It’s been so long since he came face to face with his mom.
Sunghoon carefully made his way out into the living room, feeling like he was trespassing. His mom sat on the couch, resting. Sunghoom spoke quietly, but loud enough to be heard.
His mom quickly turned her head towards him in surprise, not expecting him to be there.
“Omo na, Sunghoon-ah!!!” she stood up abruptly, taking a step towards where he was, but stopped suddenly. “Did you just arrive? When did you get here? Have you eaten?” she asked in a rush. Clearly she wanted to hug Sunghoon, but was wary about getting close.
Sunghoon bowed low, the only formal greeting he could offer his mom.
“I just arrived Mom so I haven’t eaten yet.”
“I wasn’t expecting you to come home…”
“I wasn’t really planning to, but I was tired from the flight and this house was nearer so…” Sunghoon said calmly. His words implying that this isn’t his home.
His mom was clearly flustered. “Aigoo, aigoo.. come have dinner. I’ll make something quick.”
“Let’s just order something. It’s faster.”
“Okay, son.. Anything you want to eat?”
“Anything will do, Mom.” Sunghoon made his way to the couch after saying that, finding it hard to talk to his Mom longer. He wondered how he’d fare tomorrow.
His mom ordered his favorite dumplings, and some jajjangmyeon. Both of them ate in silence, the awkwardness between them imminent. Sunghoon finished first, and stood up to deposit the dirty dishes on the sink.
“How long are you going to stay here Hoon-ah?” his mother asked.
“I’m not going to stay long Mom. I have to go to the agency tomorrow afternoon for a meeting.”
“You do know you can always come back here…” his mom said quietly, the sadness in her voice hard to deny.
Sunghoon looked at his mom, who had her back against him. Somehow his heart softened, hearing his mom’s voice. She must be lonely these days.
“I know. But you also do know I’m no longer a child.”
She then turned to look at him, her eyes downcast. “I know, I know…” she sighed heavily. “Go get some rest. I’ll take care of things here.”
Sunghoon didn’t answer. Instead he went to his room quietly, thinking hard. But then his fatigue set in, so he sent a text to Jiwon wishing him goodnight and that he’ll call him tomorrow then went to sleep.
Sunghoon woke up the next day, feeling refreshed. He looked at the time. 7am. That means it’s 2am in Hawaii. Knowing Jiwon would still be asleep, he decided to message him instead of calling.
“Good morning honey… I miss you. Call me when you wake up okay? Saranghae.”
He wasn’t expecting any reply, but to his surprise Jiwon called back immediately.
“Ya! Why are you already up? It’s still so early..” Sunghoon scolded upon picking up, but his gladness was undeniable.
“I actually went to sleep early.”
“And?” Sunghoon asked, not getting what he meant. He wondered if Jiwon was still dreaming.
“I woke up early too…” Jiwon answered chuckling. “Which means I could call you by the time you wake up knowing you’re such an early bird no matter what time you sleep.” Sunghoon smiled to himself. Jiwon knew exactly the right words to say sometimes.
“So you were actually just waiting for my text?”
“Yyap.. my day’s complete now, you know. I miss you babe.”
“Aww, aren’t you the sweetest…” Sunghoon cooed, knowing Jiwon hated getting compliments.
Sunghoon laughed, “I miss you more..”
He could literally see Jiwon’s smile by the tone of his voice, which turned husky with the next question.
“Are you still in bed?”
“Uh-huh…. You wanna see?” he teased.
A request for a video call suddenly popped up on Sunghoon’s phone. That was quick.
“Hi honey…” said Sunghoon, waving his hand at Jiwon upon accepting.
“Hello babe….” then looking at him intently, “Well… I like you better without clothes..” Jiwon teased him.
Sunghoon smiled seductively in retort, not wanting Jiwon to gain the upper hand in this conversation, especially since Jiwon was topless. “I don’t wear anything only when I’m with you..” he teased back.
“Then… do you mind pretending that you’re right next to me? I wanna see you naked.” The fire in Jiwon’s eyes was scorching.
“Uhm… are we having phone sex now?” Sunghoon’s voice dropped low, not wanting to be overheard.
Jiwon knew what it meant as soon as Sunghoon lowered his voice. Sunghoon’s still wary of his mom overhearing their conversation.
“No, not yet… But we could start if you want..” Jiwon teased, enjoying the sight of Sunghoon blushing. He wanted to crush those lips badly, missing his angel a lot.
Jiwon suddenly turned serious. “I can’t do this Hoonie-ah…”
Sunghoon got concerned as soon as he heard Jiwon’s serious tone.
“Can’t do what? Is something wrong?” Sunghoon asked worriedly, searching for indications in Jiwon’s face about any problem.
“I can’t be apart from you like this, I’m going crazy jinjja..”
Sunghoon nearly shouted at Jiwon.”Ya!!! Don’t scare me like that! I thought something bad happened..”
Jiwon’s face didn’t change though.. “I’m serious. I miss you like crazy.”
Sunghoon’s face softened at those words..
“I miss you more honey. We’ll be together soon, I promise.”
“Arasseo… come back to me quickly..”
“I will hon, I will..”
Sunghoon and Jiwon’s conversation carried on and ended only until Jiwon felt sleepy, and Sunghoon, knowing Jiwon needed his rest, bid him goodbye reluctantly.
Little did Sunghoon know that his mom heard every single word of their conversation.
Sunghoon went out of his room after taking a shower. He saw his mom in the kitchen preparing breakfast. He wondered if it was okay to talk to his mom so early in the morning, but he couldn’t avoid the inevitable. After his conversation with Jiwon, he wanted to get this over it.
“Oh, Sunghoon-ah.. Anja and eat.”
“Let’s eat together Mom.” Sunghoon invited.
His mom looked at him intently, then sat down opposite him.
Sunghoon ate in silence, needing the time to prepare himself. But his mom, as impatient as she is, asked first.
“Is there something you want to talk to me about Sunghoon?”
Fortunately Sunghoon had finished eating. Otherwise, his mom’s question would have made him lose his appetite.
“Isseoyo.” Sunghoon said tentatively.
His mom heaved a deep sigh, but not out of anger, Sunghoon noticed. More like out of defeat…
“Out with it then.”
Sunghoon said in a flat voice, trying to sound calm but failing. Now that they started, his voice shook with pent-up frustration.
“I honestly don’t know how to start Mom. I get angry when I think about what happened.”
“This is about Jiwon then.”
“Just how much truth did you hide from me?” Sunghoon couldn’t stop his voice from shaking.
His mom stayed silent for a while, watching her only son with sad eyes.
“Before you vent your anger at me, I want you to know that what I did back then was because I wanted to protect you.”
“Protect me from what? Scratch that. From who? Jiwon-hyung?” Sunghoon asked incredulously.
His mom nodded once. “I honestly thought he was just a bad influence. Since he was older, I thought he was influencing you the wrong way. I hated it when you left Seoul to live in Jeju, not because your grandfather left you the house, but because you were living with him. I thought he wasn’t the best company for you being alone there. And when I heard about the rumors, it felt like I was living a nightmare. You can say I reacted just the way any mom would react.”
“I think you overreacted Mom! I see nothing wrong with our relationship at all. It’s not like we went out in public being all lovey-dovey and everything.”
Sunghoon honestly thought they were discreet, but people’s eyes were just too sharp.
“Put yourself in my shoes. All I know is from what I heard. You were far from home, it’s normal for me to worry.”
“And you know son, every mother out there wants the best for their children. I guess I wanted what normal mothers wanted. I wanted you to find a good, respectable girl to spend time with so you can understand my frustration when I learned about you and Jiwon.” His mom continued, her voice not in the usual angry tone Sunghoon was used to. It confused him, but still…
“Jiwon-hyung understands me better than anyone else, even better than you ever did.” Sunghoon said bitterly.
“I can see that now.”
“So is this why you had to break us apart? You didn’t want me, your only son, falling in love with a guy you hated? Or with any guy period? If it’s a girl, that was okay is that it? Did you even consider my feelings Mom? Did you honestly think that because we spent a lot of time together, Jiwon-hyung and I mistook our feelings for each other? Is that what you think?”
“Yes I did. You were still young back then, it was so easy to fall in and out of love. For me, you mistook your affections for each other as a sign of love.”
“Well, it wasn’t a mistake for me. If anything, it was the best thing that happened to me.” Sunghoon could only clench his fists in anger. “And you took it away Mom. You destroyed my happiness. Do you know how much damage you’ve cost? I wasted 10 years of my life hating the one person who never gave up on me. 10 long years! I was miserable for all the wrong reasons!”
“I know.” his mom said sadly. “I’ve regretted it since you left this house, Sunghoon.”
“Eh?” Sunghoon thought he misheard his mom.
“I saw the change that took over you once you started training. You barely smiled anymore. You wouldn’t talk to us, you wouldn’t even come home. It felt like you had a total makeover. It was then that I started questioning if I did the right thing. Especially when Jiwon came here looking for you..”
“Why did you lie to him then?” tears now starting to form in Sunghoon’s eyes. He suddenly remembered Jiwon’s letter, knowing the hardship he went through just to talk to him. “Did you know the pain he was going through? You could have at least talked to him decently…”
His mom cut him off. “I was scared..”
“Of what Mom?!”
“Scared that if I tell him where you were, or what agency you went to, you’ll leave everything behind and go with him! I couldn’t lose you son. Even if you didn’t come home, it was enough for me that I knew where you were. I was selfish I know.”
Sunghoon was speechless. Somehow he understood his mom but what he can’t understand is that it seemed his mother didn’t want him to be happy at all.
“I thought mothers only want their kids to be happy.” Sunghoon said sarcastically, bitterness lacing his every word.
“I know. I had a different idea of what would make you happy. I was wrong son, I’m sorry.”
His mom apologizing to him stunned Sunghoon.
“You’re what?” was all he could say. This was the first time his mom ever said sorry for anything.
“I realized now just how much you and Jiwon meant to each other. I heard your conversation a while ago.”
Sunghoon’s eyes widened in alarm. His mom waved her hand, as if to say there’s nothing to worry about.
“I haven’t heard that happiness from you in a long time Sunghoon-ah.” His mom’s voice started to break this time. “It was evident by the sound of your voice while talking to him. Not even when you finally debuted, or even got first place did I hear that happy tone of yours. You were smiling yes, but to people who knew you, they would see that those smiles never reached your eyes. And then you left home to live on your own, we never saw each other after that. I felt miserable. I could only talk to you on the phone, but even then, you would finish our conversations quickly. I was angry that you only went to see your father but not me. But your father knew you a lot better I guess. He said to just let you live your life the way you want, because if I interfered again, I would definitely lose you.” She stopped to take a deep breath. “He told me about your call a few days ago. And that’s when I knew that you’ve met him. I knew it the moment you said you were going to Hawaii, there was a chance you’ll meet Jiwon there. I was right..”
“Wait… You knew all along that Jiwon-hyung was in Hawaii?” Sunghoon asked, cutting her off. How did his mom know where Jiwon was all this time, when he only learned the truth just days ago.
“He left you a letter…”
“And you didn’t think to give it to me?!”
“I told you that I was scared that time.” His mom said tiredly. “I realize just how much I must have suffocated you all these years when you left home and refused to meet with me. Then it dawned on me what your father said when Jiwon came here ten years ago, that if I wanted you truly happy I should just let you be. I guess it took me all these years to finally accept that. Mianhe Sunghoon-ah.”
Sunghoon couldn’t believe his ears. Does this mean he’s finally receiving his mom’s blessing?
“I should apologize to Jiwon too. I didn’t know at that time just how truly special your feelings for each other are. But I hope you understand Sunghoon that all I wanted was the best for you. I may have acted rashly but it was because I love you. I’m so sorry for everything …”
His mom was crying now. This was the first time Sunghoon saw his mom cry and strangely, it tore at him. She was still his mother after all. She was blood. His mom must have suffered from loneliness too, just like him, just like Jiwon.
Tentatively, he went to her side, and for the first time, in a long while, hugged his mother. It made her cry even harder.
“I’m sorry too Mom…” was all he could say. He too didn’t realize just how hurt his mom must have been, refusing to be met by his only son. His apology spoke of all the things he’s sorry for, and his mom knew what it meant. She hugged him tighter.
They stayed that way for a while, crying in each other’s shoulders.
It was minutes before they broke apart. Sunghoon took his mom’s hands into his.
“Mom, I know I never say this to you, but I’m grateful to you and Dad for your support and for giving me everything. I just want your trust on this one.”
“Are you truly happy, son? Does he really make you happy?”
Apparently, his happiness was his mom’s only concern. Tears threatened to fall again, but Sunghoon brushed it aside. “He completes me.” he said simply.
And maybe that one line explained everything, for his mom nodded, hugged him tightly and said, “Then just be happy, both of you.”
Sunghoon’s smiled at his mother for the first time in years. A genuine, happy smile.
“When the time is right, I need to talk to Jiwon too.”
“Later Mom. We’ll both talk to him later.”
His mom’s smile was all Sunghoon needed to finally feel relief. It felt like an early Christmas gift to Sunghoon, his mother’s acceptance. He didn’t realize just how much it meant to him. Jiwon would probably be happy too. His heart felt lighter now, definitely lighter.
Now, only the agency remains. Hopefully, everything goes in his favor. Then Jiwon and him, they can finally be together.
Just one more chapter to go guys. Thank you for supporting!!! EunKang fans are the greatest.”””
Chapter 10 Part 1: Back
Hi guys… I know I did say that it’s the last chapter but I didn’t say how many parts it will be.! The comments were heartwarming seriously. I figured it would be too tiring for me to type the whole chapter since it’s toooo long and it’ll take quite some time to finish. I didn’t want you though to wait long so I decided on the parts instead. The 1st part’s already up, the 2nd part would be about Sunghoon’s decision and the third part, well, we’ll see.” And don’t worry, there’s an epilogue..## Hope you continue supporting me. !!! Enjoy!!
Later that afternoon, Sunghoon’s manager picked him up from their house for the meeting with their CEO. Sunghoon felt lighter than he had in years, finally reconciling with his mother. For some reason, everything seemed to fall into place. There was just the agency remaining and Sunghoon, for once, didn’t know if he was doing the right thing or not. A small part of him wanted to continue his career, but staying in Korea meant living far from Jiwon again. He couldn’t fathom the idea.
Sunghoon looked at his manager. Jinhyuk had been with him from the start of his career. If ever he gave it all up, he wondered what he would do…
His manager looked at him through the rearview mirror.
“Manyagae…” Sunghoon was hesitant to ask making his manager confused.
“What if what?”
Jinhyuk had noticed the change in Sunghoon’s demeanor as soon as he arrived from Hawaii. He seemed brighter, even now, he looked happier than he’d seen him for the past years. He thought the trip did him good. He’s been working really hard without taking a break and he deserved the vacation. But now, he could see the conflict in his eyes, like he was unsure of something, and he felt nervous somehow.
“What if I retired from all this, what would happen to you?” Sunghoon asked tentatively.
Jinhyuk didn’t like the question. He could see that he was seriously contemplating the idea.
“I don’t know. Maybe they’d assign me to other artists. Why would you ask that?”
“Hmmm…?” Sunghoon answered distractedly.
“Tell me honestly, do you want to?”
“I’m not sure…”
“Then don’t… you can rest or take some time off but don’t.”
“Hyung, it’s complicated..”
Sunghoon’s phone vibrated just then. Judging from how his face brightened up, it must be someone special.
“Hey.” Sunghoon answered quietly, not wanting his manager to overhear.
“Hi… Bad time?” Jiwon asked, noticing Sunghoon’s hushed voice.
“No, not really.”
“Ahhh.. Arasseo.. I’ll call you later then.” Jiwon knew Sunghoon wasn’t free to talk, but he couldn’t help feeling disappointed. He just got off from a hectic day at the hotel so he wanted to hear Sunghoon’s voice to soothe himself but he forgot that he would be busy now.
Sunghoon noticed, and he didn’t like how disappointed Jiwon sounded.
“No! it’s okay, we can talk.” Sunghoon said hurriedly, not wanting to hurt Jiwon’s feelings.
“Later babe. I know you’re busy. Call me when you’re free okay?” and Jiwon hung up before Sunghoon could say another word.
Sunghoon sighed. This was exactly what he feared and it’s already starting. He didn’t want another misunderstanding between them especially now that they’re far from each other. Sunghoon decided to call Jiwon back, after all his manager knows better than to get involved in his personal affairs.
Jiwon answered on the second ring.
“Ya… Why’d you hang up? We were still talking.”
“Hon, please.. let’s not fight..” Sunghoon saw his manager’s eyes widen upon hearing the endearment. He honestly didn’t care anymore, as long as Jiwon and him were okay.
“We’re not fighting.” Jiwon said stubbornly.
“No, we’re not, but you’re whining…”
He could hear Jiwon’s sigh on the other line.
“I just miss you. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. I just had a tiring day.”
Sunghoon wanted so much to see him he decided to risk it. Plugging in his headphones, he requested for a video call, but Jiwon cancelled it.
Sunghoon though wouldn’t take no for an answer. He tried again, and this time Jiwon did accept, but he wouldn’t show his face. He kept his head down and Sunghoon could only hear his voice as he refused to look up.
“Ya… is it okay?” Jiwon knew the risk Sunghoon was taking. He wouldn’t allow him, though. What if someone sees them?
“It’s okay, I’m still traveling.”
“Your manager’s with you..”
“Hon, I’m using headphones. Can you please look at me?”
Jiwon looked up, checking to see if Sunghoon was alone. He breathed out a sigh of relief. Seeing no one behind or beside Sunghoon, he finally relaxed, and his face split into a bright smile.
Sunghoon loved that smile. God, he missed him. And he couldn’t stop the words from tumbling out.
“I miss you..” Sunghoon said softly.
His manager finally caught on, turning on the van’s radio to muffle out Sunghoon’s voice.
“And I miss you more. I’m sorry about hanging up…”
“It’s okay I understand. Have you eaten?”
“Maybe later. I take it you’re on your way to the agency?”
“Yes. I have a meeting with the CEO.”
Jiwon saw Sunghoon’s face change as soon as he said that. They’ve already talked about this before Sunghoon came back to Korea. That time Sunghoon didn’t hesitate to say he’ll give it up. His contract was ending anyway but now he could see it in his eyes and knew Sunghoon couldn’t give it all up that easily. Jiwon sighed, knowing he had two choices. Either he’ll be happy or he’ll have to wait again. If he was honest with himself, waiting would be agonizing, but he loved Sunghoon. So he decided to put on a brave smile, even when his heart felt heavy.
“Call me later after your meeting then okay? I’ll have dinner now.”
Sunghoon could see the smile was fake. It didn’t reach Jiwon’s eyes.
“Hoonie-ah..” Jiwon cut him off.
“You know that I’ll support whatever decision you make right?”
Sunghoon knew Jiwon just reassures himself by that statement. But he also knew that Jiwon might not like it if he decides to stay as a singer.
“Don’t push yourself. Just follow what your heart really wants.”
“I promised…” was all Sunghoon could say.
Jiwon knew it then, and that he couldn’t do anything about it. Feeling suddenly tired, he wanted the conversation to stop.
“Promises are made to be broken all the time…” he said, the sadness in his voice was undeniable. “Just call me after your meeting okay. I love you.”
Sunghoon wanted to cry at that moment. He was hurting him again. He was about to say he loves him too but Jiwon already ended the call. Sunghoon slumped in his seat, his heart heavy. He wanted to chastise himself. Jiwon didn’t deserve this.
With a sigh he began typing a message to Jiwon. He shouldn’t do this to him.
Sunghoon finished typing and hit send, wondering if what he said would be enough for comfort.
Honey I love you so much. Geogjeongma. I’ll definitely fulfill my promise to you.
I miss you… Nal gidalyeo. We’ll be together yaksokae.
Jiwon went to the kitchen and opened the fridge, taking out his favorite wine.
After the conversation with Sunghoon, he felt he needed a drink. He was being greedy, or rather he was being selfish. Even with Sunghoon’s text, his heart wasn’t at peace. If he was being honest, he was scared. Scared that Sunghoon might choose his career rather than be with him. He knew music made Sunghoon happy, and he too, loves to watch Sunghoon perform on stage. They just got back together, but no matter how strong their love for each other may be, they spent more time apart than together. Distance was an issue.
Jiwon sighed deeply as he pocketed his phone. Now he knew why so many long distance relationships don’t work. The feelings may be strong, but the physical existence mattered.
He took a sip of wine straight from the bottle, took another bottle of wine, and went out of the house. The cabana beckoned for him, and he made his way there, a bottle in each of his hand. He needed the courage a drink usually gives.
He sat down carefully, setting the bottles beside him and taking out his phone. He looked at the time. It was half past 7. The meeting would have started by now. He touched the ring he kept around his neck, trying to relax.
Sunghoon’s decision would make or break him he knew. The wait was killing him. He realized just then that that has been the story of his life. Waiting and waiting.
He took a swig off the bottle, wanting to ease the tension he’s been feeling.
He watched the waves crashing towards the shore, and was reminded of Jeju. He and Sunghoon would sometimes spend all night by the beach, watching the stars and talking about their dreams.
He definitely missed his angel a lot. It was totally different with Sunghoon around. He took his phone, typing a message, not caring if Sunghoon’s able to read it or not. He wanted him to know. He spent all his life doing it, he might as well continue doing it.
I love you too babe. And I’ll wait for you. I’ll always wait for you.
Chapter 10 Part 2: Decisions and Promises
Sunghoon sat opposite his agency’s CEO, still on the phone talking to someone. They were at his office, with Sunghoon requesting that the meeting be only among the two of them first. He wanted to lay out his plans with him before anyone else. After all, CEO Lee has always been so supportive of him.
“Sunghoon-ah, you look radiant. I guess Hawaii did you good.” said CEO Lee as he finished the call.
“Yes, it was the best actually.” which was the truth anyway.
“Well, how are you then? You think we can continue where we left off?”
Sunghoon took it to mean his pending album. Only one song had been finished recording, and they did decide for a full-length one, so he needed at least 7 more.
“Before that, I need to ask something.”
“Teppeunim, my contract’s ending in July right?”
‘That’s only 2 months away’ thought Sunghoon.
“If we were to continue working on the album, 2 months is not enough to finish it at all. That means I’d have to re-sign with the agency then in order to finish it.”
CEO Lee looked at him in confusion.
“I thought that was already a given. The contract’s the same with the existing one. Why? Do you not want to continue with us?”
“No it’s not that…”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“I need to shorten the term.”
“Just three more years please Teppeunim.”
Sunghoon knows that his agency usually renews artists’ contract for another 5 years. He couldn’t wait that long. In 3 years time he would be 30. He thought it would be fitting for his 10th year to be his last year as a singer. That doesn’t mean he’ll stop singing or that he’ll stop making music. He will continue, but he wanted to be with Jiwon because for him, Jiwon is the music of his life. He hasn’t told Jiwon yet of his decision, but he knew in his heart that Jiwon would understand.
“Sunghoon-ah, wae? I need you to think about it carefully.”
“Teppeunim, all these years I’ve never asked anything from you. Not once. I was perfectly fine with everything. But this time, it’s different. Just this once please. I was actually going to ask for just a year but that would be unfair on your part.”
“Tell me why first. I need to understand.” CEO Lee said firmly. He may be kind, but when it comes to agency matters, he’s probably the strictest.
Sunghoon hesitated. He couldn’t possibly tell him about Jiwon. “The thing is… I have a promise to keep. It’s really personal, but it matters a lot to me.”
Sunghoon waited with bated breath as CEO Lee carefully looked at him with thoughtful eyes, contemplating hard..
After a while, CEO Lee stood up, Sunghoon automatically following in his suit.
“Sunghoon-ah, I can’t make a decision right now. This is all so sudden. I need time to think this through especially if we have to revise everything in the contract. I take it aside from the term, there are other things you want as well?”
“There are just a few…”
“See? As you know, you’re one of our top artists. I’ll be blunt, you bring in a lot of money to the company so you can understand my hesitation about this matter.”
“Let’s meet again within this week. Maybe three days from now. We’re still working on the new group so my schedule’s pretty filled up. I’ll consider your request though, seeing as this may be important to you. Is that okay?”
“Yes, thank you Teppeunim…”
“Well, I have to go to another meeting in a few minutes. Anything else?”
“No, nothing else. We can discuss further after you’ve decided..”
“I’ll call you then..”
Sunghoon took it as his cue to leave. Bowing low, he went out of the office and went in search for his manager. He found him in the lounge talking with the other managers. Sunghoon smiled at all of them as they greeted him politely.
“Jinhyuk hyung.. Let’s go home..”
His manager bade goodbye to his co-workers, and the two of them made their way towards the parking lot.
“Meeting done?” Jinhyuk asked.
“Not really. We didn’t come to an agreement yet so there’ll be another meeting.”
He had nothing else scheduled today so he decided he needed to get home to his apartment. He needed to talk to Jiwon. Hopefully, Jiwon can understand his situation.
“Sunghoon-ah, are you really thinking of retiring?” Jinhyuk quietly asked when they were finally inside the van.
Sunghoon contemplated his answer before speaking.. He knew his manager was worried.
“As a singer, maybe. But not retire. No. I’m thinking of going into producing and composing.. but it won’t happen yet so there’s no need to worry.”
“Well… as long as you’re happy…”
Sunghoon smiled at him.
“Honestly hyung, when I was in Hawaii, I felt liberated. No one knew me there, so I was free to roam anywhere without worrying about anything. I honestly felt strange when I came back, there were camera flashes everywhere I look. And besides…”
“There’s someone you left there right?” Jinhyuk finished for him. Sunghoon’s phone conversation earlier didn’t go unnoticed by him.
“Yeah, well.. I got lucky…” Sunghoon simply stated. ‘It took 10 years though.’ he thought inwardly as his thoughts drifted to Jiwon. He looked at the time. 5 in the afternoon. It would be 10 in the evening there. He didn’t know if Jiwon would still be awake. He decided to send him a text.
Hey… Done with the meeting. I’m on my way home. Will call you when I get there. I love you.
He waited whether Jiwon would reply or not.
Within seconds his phone chimed.
That was quicker than I thought. Stay safe okay? Call me as soon as you arrive. Love you more.
“Hyung, can you drive faster?” Sunghoon said to his manager. He couldn’t wait to talk to Jiwon.
Jiwon kept looking at his phone, waiting for Sunghoon’s call. He was still tense, even after consuming a bottle full of wine. He didn’t feel drunk, instead he felt wide awake. Waiting always made him antsy. He honestly contemplated about what he would do if Sunghoon decided to stay in Korea. Either he would follow there and leave Hawaii for a while, or stay here and wait for him again. Jiwon knew that waiting would tire him out. He’d already spent 1/3 of his life waiting and pining he didn’t think he could stand another bout of it. But going back to Korea would be too risky on Sunghoon’s part. He wasn’t just any celebrity. He was one of the top. Homosexuality, though accepted, is still largely frowned upon in Korea. If they were together there, people will put two and two together. It would be Jeju all over again.
Jiwon massaged his temple, his head aching from all the thoughts rambling inside. Just then, his phone lit up, signalling a request for a video call. Jiwon tried not to show his tension knowing Sunghoon would notice and carefully accepted the call.
“Hey…” greeted Jiwon, his voice somewhat hoarse.
Sunghoon looked at him worriedly, noticing the lackluster in his eyes. He looked lost, like he had been drinking.
“Hi.. Eodiga? You look sick..”
“At the cabana, it’s probably just the weather. I’m fine.”
Sunghoon knew he wasn’t fine. Him being by the beach meant he was stressed and yes, he was drunk. Jiwon would always say he’s fine when he’s tipsy. The thought made Sunghoon feel guilty.
“Get inside the house hon. It gets cold out there at night, and you’re just wearing a shirt.” he said, the worry in his voice obvious.
“I said I’m fine.” Jiwon said curtly, the wine finally taking effect.
Sunghoon pouted. Jiwon’s stubborness can be a pain. But then, he couldn’t blame him. This was his fault after all. He sighed.
“I’ll feel better if you were safe inside the house hon.. You’re already shivering in case you didn’t notice…”
Jiwon looked at Sunghoon intently. God, he misses him. His heart ached with longing. He didn’t realize how empty it feels without Sunghoon around. The feeling only intensified by the wine and the call, knowing he couldn’t hold him close.
“Please.. ” Sunghoon begged. What he wouldn’t give to be with him right now. He hated seeing him lost like this. It didn’t help that he was drunk, it made him look more vulnerable. Sunghoon wanted so much to hug him. He knew how much a hug comforts Jiwon.
“I miss you..” he said, his voice cracking. “I really miss you Hoonie-ah..”
Before he knew it, a tear fell from Sunghoon’s eye. He couldn’t help it. Seeing Jiwon like this broke his heart…
“I miss you more, you just don’t know how much I do…” Sunghoon tried to stifle a sob, but failed.
The small sound somehow broke the spell Jiwon was in, for he looked at Sunghoon worriedly. He hated seeing Sunghoon cry, more so when it was because of him. He inwardly cursed himself for being an idiot. Of course, he’s not the only one suffering. Sunghoon was actually suffering more.
“Babe, don’t cry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you worry..”
Sunghoon wiped at his tears, knowing how Jiwon hated it. But his silence was still a cause of concern for Jiwon. “Shit..” he heard him say.
“It’s not your fault hon.. It just hit me suddenly I couldn’t help it..” he said. Sunghoon took a deep breath to calm himself. They have a lot to talk about.
Sunghoon knew that they would never finish if they kept apologizing to each other. “If you’re sorry, then please get inside the house, you’re making me more worried.”
He succeeded in making Jiwon smile, and that put him at ease.
“Okay.. I’m going, I’m going…”
Once inside the house, Jiwon flopped down on the sofa, grateful for the warmth the room brought. He didn’t know how cold he was until he got home, when he saw his hand trembling slightly. No wonder Sunghoon got concerned. He has the worst immune system when it comes to the flu, and staying outside that long might really make him sick.
Jiwon propped his phone on the phone stand to better talk to Sunghoon, or at least, he could rest his hand.
“Feeling better?” Sunghoon asked.
“Lots..” he looked at Sunghoon thoroughly, gauging his mindset. “Well?”
The simple question was easy to understand. Sunghoon let out a breath, before starting.
“Nothing’s been decided yet though..” he finished, after relaying what he and his CEO talked about.
“I see. So you still don’t know if they’ll allow your request.” Jiwon said thoughtfully.
“What if they decide not to honor it? What’s your back-up plan?”
Sunghoon smiled at Jiwon. He felt relieved that Jiwon didn’t contradict his decision. His support means a lot to him, and although he doesn’t say it, he knows that Jiwon has his back.
“It’s actually a win-win situation for me hon. If they agree, I get to sing for three more years till my 10th anniversary. If not, I’ll join you there, that one’s a no-brainer.”
“Can you really give up your career?”
Jiwon had to ask. He knew how much Sunghoon loved to sing. He trained so hard for it. He wondered what made him decide like that.
Sunghoon looked at Jiwon, his voice taking on a serious note. “I’ve never told this to anyone, not even my manager. But the past 7 years had been such a blur for me. It’s a tiring life hon. The endless schedules, the numerous travels, lack of sleep, paparazzis following everywhere, the pressure of maintaining your image, I was honestly not happy. The fans were the only bright spot left. It felt like work for me, and lately I wasn’t enjoying at all. I honestly don’t mind the peace and quiet of a normal life.”
“Oh…” then Jiwon smiled for the first time that day. “I guess fame isn’t everything.”
Sunghoon smiled back at him. “No it’s not. Besides, it’s not just singing that matters to me. My life doesn’t have to revolve on music alone.”
“Well, as long as you’re happy, that’s what matters to me.” said Jiwon truthfully.
“Honey, you make me happy, haven’t I told you that?” Sunghoon said seriously.
Jiwon smirked at him though, “Clearly, you’re still cheesy…” and when Sunghoon pouted at him, “but I like it.” he added as an after-thought, his eyes dancing with laughter.
It amused Sunghoon how Jiwon could always turn a serious conversation into a happy one. It made him feel lighter. “Well, you’d have to suffer my cheesiness forever. It’s something inborn.” he teased.
“I wouldn’t mind that at all. I think forever’s gonna hate me though. I just took you away from him.”
Sunghoon’s laugh was like music to Jiwon’s ears.”Oh wow! Look who’s cheesy now!”
He had to laugh with him.
They talked well into the night (well, in Jiwon’s case that is) before ending their conversation. Sunghoon promised to update Jiwon after his next meeting with the CEO. Jiwon, in turn, promised to support Sunghoon in every decision he makes. They each said their goodbyes and usual I love you’s, finishing the conversation on a happy note.
Jiwon lay in bed that night thinking deeply. He also had a decision to make in three days…
3 days later 10am
Sunghoon couldn’t hide his nervousness. It was like D-Day for him. His manager sat with him outside the CEO’s office waiting. After a while, his secretary told him they could enter.
CEO Lee stood up when they went inside, motioning for them to take their seats. He then seated himself, and started the meeting.
The meeting took well over an hour and half to finish. They managed to come into an agreement, shook hands and Sunghoon and his manager went out of the office towards the studio.
“Are you sure about this Sunghoon?” his manager asked.
Sunghoon smiled at him. “I’ve never been more sure than this hyung. It worked out perfectly don’t you think?”
“Well for me it did. But you, is three years enough?”
“It’s more than enough. Besides, I still get to make music.” he said happily.
“Judging from your aura, I guess you really are satisfied..” Jinhyuk had to smile back at Sunghoon. His happiness was always infectious, especially when he smiled you couldn’t help not to smile back.
“Oh I’m more than satisfied..” he said, as they went inside the studio to work on his album.
Jiwon’s phone chimed with a message from Sunghoon.
Hey honey, meeting’s done. He agreed for three more years. I’ll tell you about it later. I’m at the studio right now recording, I think I’ll finish around three. Will call you as soon as I get home. I love you.
Jiwon smiled. It’s about time then. He typed in his reply.
Ok babe. I’ll wait for your call. Don’t push yourself too much. Love you more.
He buzzed in his secretary, asking her to come into the office.
“Yes sir?” Monica asked as soon as she entered.
“Sit down Monica.”
Once she was seated, Jiwon too sat in his chair and faced her.
“How long have you been working here?”
“Since the beginning sir. I started out as a service crew though..”
“And you made you way up slowly, I remember.”
“Yes sir, I did.”
Monica surely did. She worked really hard to pay for her college tuition, and after graduating, she didn’t want to work anywhere else. The hotel felt like her 2nd home, and Mr. Eun was the kindest person to work for. She might be biased, since she hasn’t worked at other hotels but she heard the other employees compare Mr. Eun to their previous bosses. It somehow made her proud. Mr. Eun was really young too, he’s only 29, and honestly handsome. Because he’s an orphan, he treats everyone in the hotel like his family.
Jiwon looked at Monica thoroughly.
“You did finish Hotel Room and Management right? You even took Master’s Degree in Business Administration, am I correct?”
“Yes sir, I did.” Monica now started to wonder what this is about.
Jiwon smiled at her. “How do you feel about handling the hotel for a while?”
Monica thought she misheard. “What was that Sir?”
Jiwon repeated the question.
“Mr. Eun, I don’t think I’m capable of doing that.”
“Stop calling me Mr. Eun, it’s Matthew. I told you there’s no formalities here. We’re not that huge of a hotel. We’re just one big family.”
In fact, they were the smallest hotel with only 5 floors, approximately 10 rooms per floor except for the 5th which was their office. But they were the one tourists prefer more than the luxurious ones. Maybe because they have the ambience of home.
“On the contrary though, I think you’re more than capable. Everybody here acknowledges your authority. They always come to you before they come to me, so you know firsthand all that happens here. Besides, it’ll be good training for you. Decision-making is key to running a good business.”
“For how long do I have to do that though?”
“For the next three years.”
“Three years! Sir, I mean Matthew,” she corrected when Jiwon raised his eyebrows at her, “I don’t think I can last that long. I just might ruin everything you worked hard for.”
Jiwon laughed. “It’s not like I’m leaving you to decide everything by yourself. I’d still be in contact with you. I’ll just be really far from here so I need someone I trust to handle this establishment. Besides, I’d have to train you personally first before I leave. Otherwise, yes, I’d definitely see the hotel in ruins when I get back.” he winked at Monica, joking.
“Where would you go Matt? If it was just some business trip, you wouldn’t take three years.”
“It’s a personal one. I think it’s about time too. I’m going home for a while. I’m going back to Korea.”
Chapter’s up!! As promised. Now the last part and the epilogue is gonna take me some time for I’ll be quite busy preparing for my daughter’s birthday. I’ll try finishing it by next week though. Thank you for your patience.😀😀😀😀
Chapter 10 Part 3: Ever After
The last part of Chapter 10 is up. Epilogue will be up by Sunday…!!! Thanks for waiting patiently. Gosh, I can’t believe this fanfic is ending even when I’m the one writing it. My acknowledgements will be posted after the Epilogue.”””
Sunghoon sat in his living room and waited while the call connected. He just got back from recording which took longer than he expected so it was already 4:30 pm when he arrived at his apartment. He felt apologetic calling Jiwon at this hour, hoping that his boyfriend wouldn’t be too tired from work.
‘He should be sleeping and resting by now, instead of waiting up for me to call’ he thought glumly.
Jiwon accepted the call smiling, and Sunghoon’s relief was evident as he smiled back at him. Jiwon chuckled at his expression.
“What’s with the face babe. Did you think I wouldn’t answer?” he teased.
“I knew you would. I just don’t like disturbing you so late already..” explained
Sunghoon. The time difference can be a pain sometimes.
“It’s not really late, it’s only quarter to 10.” Jiwon said as he lay comfortably in his bed. The truth was that he was tired. He started training Monica a while ago and his head felt drained from all the explaining. But he didn’t want to show it, not in front of Sunghoon. Well, on screen that is.
“Still… Have you eaten?”
“I ate with the staff a while ago.. We had an important meeting..” he held a meeting with the department heads too.
He had to have a supportive staff if Monica was in-charge. He didn’t want any jealousy arising from anyone with regards to position. He made it clear that they’re not a corporation, therefore there’s no hierarchy. His absence, after all, would only be temporary and he will be checking them from time to time. Jiwon also made necessary precautions regarding funding. No one else had access to the hotel’s bank account, only he did, so any misappropriation would not be missed by him. All withdrawals would have to be approved by him. He trusts his staff though.
Like Monica, they’ve been with him and his mother from the start. He thought they would leave when his mother died, but they stuck with him and treated him like family. Still, in this day and age, you can never afford to be too trusting.
Money, after all, is the root of all evil. He did allow them though the freedom of decision. They wouldn’t have to get approval from him with regards to running the hotel, unless it was really important. He made it clear during the meeting and everyone was in accord.
“So… three years huh?” he asked, wanting to know Sunghoon’s reason.
“Yes.. Is it okay?” Sunghoon asked timidly, knowing he decided before asking Jiwon’s opinion. He silently chastised himself. “I should’ve asked you, I’m sorry…”
Jiwon tsked him.. “You didn’t have to babe. It’s not for me to decide. Besides, I know how important this is to you.” he smiled up at him, “It’s not that long.
Before you know it three years would have passed by.”
“Yes, well… it’s still a lot of time to be away from you. What if you decide not to wait for me? What if you met someone else?”
Sunghoon didn’t want to voice out his fears, but he couldn’t help it. Jiwon was in a place where all the beautiful people come and go.
“I should be the one saying that, you know..” Jiwon retorted, enjoying Sunghoon’s jealousy immensely. He never once showed it to him, so this was a first, and he liked it.
Sunghoon pouted, finding the idea preposterous. “If you must know, I’m not the one with a lot of free time..”
The truth is he was scared. Jiwon had waited for him long enough, he wondered just how much longer he could hold on. Of course, they love each other, they’ve already proven that many times but relationships last with proper communication and proven that many times but relationships last with proper communication and physical presence. Communication was not a problem, yet. The physicality is already a concern, but once he finished the album, and started promotions, he’d be so busy he probably wouldn’t even have time to pick up his phone.
“Trust me babe, I don’t have eyes for anyone else except you..” Jiwon assured him.
“You don’t have to worry about us, we’ll be fine.” ‘You’ll be surprised how fine we will be’ he thought to himself. “What else did you talk about?”
“Oh, nothing much. Just that the contract’s for another three years, and that I get to compose the rest of the songs for the album.” The last album would be his gift to everyone. His fans, himself, his family and of course, Jiwon.
“Oohh, you’re a composer now huh..”
“Ya, I always compose my songs. My debut song was for you remember?”
Jiwon smirked. “Yeah, thanks. It made me cry a lot..”
Sunghoon laughed. “That was the past.. I promise no more crying for both of us.”
“Unless it’s happy tears.” said Jiwon.
Sunghoon nodded. “Yes, happy tears. You can cry buckets of it..”
“I don’t drink water that much, I doubt I’ll fill up a bucket. Unless it’s bloody tears already, that would be scary..” joked Jiwon.
His joking did the trick, it made Sunghoon’s mind at ease. He smiled at him.
“What’s with you today? You seem to be in a good mood..”
“Something good happened actually.. Good news…” he said mysteriously..
“Care to elaborate..?” Sunghoon pushed. But knowing Jiwon, he wouldn’t spill anything unless he’s drunk.
“You’ll find out soon.. Maybe 2-3 days from now..”
Though curious, Sunghoon knew better than to push Jiwon to talk. He then decided to change the subject.
“Hon, you’ll wait for me right?” Concern etched in every word.
Jiwon read it clearly, knowing Sunghoon was worried he’ll lose interest or even fall out of love. ‘Like that’s gonna happen’ he thought ruefully.
“There’s no need to worry babe. I’ll be waiting for you no matter how long it takes. You know, you really should trust me more. It’s not like I have a face like yours. No one would take interest in me you know..”
“That’s where you’re wrong. Even back here in Korea girls would just stop by our house to ogle at you. Gosh, I wanted to pull out their hairs..” Sunghoon made a face as he reminisced their youth. Jiwon had such strong charisma he pulled girls towards him like a magnet. Not to mention he was handsome too, especially when he smiled.
“You sound like a girl getting jealous over nothing.”
“I actually feel like a girl when I’m with you, it’s crazy.”
“Well don’t get your panties in a bunch, I’m not interested in anyone else. Although, I like seeing you jealous, it makes me proud and confident..” he chuckled as Sunghoon stuck his tongue out at him.
“I don’t wear panties hon..”
“It’s an expression babe..”
Their loving banter continued well until Jiwon could no longer fight off his sleep. He said good night to Sunghoon, blowing him a kiss before ending the call.
He gently closed his eyes, a ghost of a smile remaining on his lips while he slept as he thought about the fact that he’ll be able to kiss him for real in a few days..
4 days later
Sunghoon finished writing the song meant for Jiwon. The only problem was how to sing it without being too obvious.. Oh well, he’ll find a way. He’d already finished recording three songs and that’s quite fast. Just editing and mixing were left for those three. But now, he’s a bit stuck with the other songs, mainly the melodies, as he didn’t want all of them to be pure ballads. He massaged his head and looked at the clock.
“Oh shit!” he exclaimed. It was already 7pm.
“Dammit!” he cursed again. It would already be midnight in Hawaii, he doubted
Jiwon would still be awake. Not to mention it was his birthday today and their anniversary too. He stayed later than he intended, not noticing the time. He promised Jiwon he would call him at 4 in the afternoon. He looked at his phone.
20 missed calls
# $ Hon$
Gathering his belongings he went out of the recording studio in haste, silently cursing the lack of privacy at work. If he could he wouldn’t have to go home just to call him, but since he was still at the agency, he couldn’t risk being heard and seen by anyone. He made it to the van in record time, much to his manager’s surprise, and quickly told him to go home.
“What’s the rush?” asked his manager as he started the van.
“I just have to do something important.” answered Sunghoon distractedly, as he furiously typed a message to Jiwon apologizing.
Hey hon, are you still awake? I’m soo sorry I didn’t notice the time. I’m just on my way home.
He didn’t know what more to say though. After a while, Jiwon didn’t reply.
Sunghoon of course expected it. He must have already fallen asleep. They made it to his apartment 30 minutes later, Sunghoon obviously irate with himself.
“Uhm, Sunghoon-ah, what time do I pick you up tomorrow?”
“Oh not tomorrow hyung. I’ll have to finish writing most of the songs, at least three too, so I need an entire day to myself. You know how I compose right? Pick me up the next day around 10 in the morning. I’d be setting up meeting schedules with producers by then.”
“Okay… don’t push yourself too much. There’s no need to rush this album you know.”
“I know, but the more songs I write, the more options I have. I’ll see you Tuesday morning okay?”
“Okay..” and his manager sped off off the parking lot as Sunghoon entered the elevator and pushed the button to his apartment.
He looked at his phone again and sighed. This was his problem when he tended to concentrate, he’d get oblivious to all of his surroundings. He’ll just have to wake extra early tomorrow just so he could call Jiwon firsthand. As he stepped out of the elevator, he suddenly felt tired. It didn’t feel complete, not being able to talk to him. He punched in his password, and stopped dead in his tracks as soon as he opened the door.
White rose petals littered the entrance, making a pathway towards his dining area.
His lights were all off, as his favorite lavender scented candles provided ample illumination to his house. He followed the trail of roses, somehow knowing who was behind it.
He stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw Jiwon in the dining area. He felt like he was dreaming, until Jiwon spoke.
Jiwon sat on top of the dining table, his arms crossed across his chest, smiling widely at Sunghoon, noting the suprised look on his face.
“Took you long enough.. the candles are nearly melted you know..”
Sunghoon was still unable speak, too surprised to see Jiwon.
Jiwon sighed, uncrossing his arms and standing fully “You know, I could use a hug, or a kiss, or maybe you could tell me what’s going through that mind of yours. A mere hi would suffice too..”
Sunghoon took a step closer, then another step until he was just a step apart from Jiwon. Jiwon noticed the stack Sunghoon carried in his hands and slowly relieved them from him and put it on a chair.
“Your hands are free, can I get my hug now?”
Sunghoon didn’t just hug him, he captured Jiwon’s lips in a searing kiss. Jiwon answered just as passionately, loving the softness of Sunghoon’s lips against his, sliding his tongue across Sunghoon’s lower lip, slightly teasing him. Sunghoon wouldn’t back down though as he slid his tongue inside Jiwon’s in one swift motion earning him a soft moan of pleasure. They kissed like there’s no tomorrow, the past weeks of being apart evidently making them vulnerable to each other’s presence.
They broke apart after a while, catching their breaths. Jiwon held Sunghoon’s face in his hands gently, caressing his cheek. “I’ve missed you babe.” he said huskily.
Sunghoon hugged him tight, whispering into his ear.. “I’ve missed you too hon. God I’ve missed you.”
“Come here and eat. I know you’re hungry..”
Sunghoon sat down, looking at the table in awe. His favorite dish, Samgyetang, lie in the center of the table, well-cooked non-marinated pork belly and kimchi on each side adorning it.
“Did you cook?” he asked Jiwon, for the food was obviously home-made, as Jiwon made his way to blowing the candles and switching on the lights.
“Well, I tried. I’m confident with the meat, though I think I murdered the chicken.” he said chuckling. “It’s been a while since I cooked a Korean dish but it tastes alright.”
“It’s delicious..” said Sunghoon, already gulping some of the soup. “Whaa..”
Jiwon smiled at his partner. He carefully sat opposite him and proudly watched as he devoured the food.
“You look like you haven’t eaten in ages.”
“I haven’t eaten since lunchtime so, yeah, I’m hungry. Here..” he said as he handed him a bowl of samgyetang.
They were carelessly lounging in Sunghoon’s bedroom after consuming the sumptuous meal, Sunghoon lying on Jiwon’s lap as Jiwon massaged his head gently.
“When did you get here hon?”
Sunghoon’s sharp intake of breath made him smile.
“You mean when I called yesterday you were already here?”
“Uh-huh… That’s why I held the phone level to my body so you wouldn’t see my surroundings.” he smirked as Sunghoon glared at him.
“What? You don’t like it?” he teased.
“You should have told me! I could have picked you up at the airport…”
“And cause a scene?” said Jiwon, cutting him off. “If you picked me up at the airport, I might have kissed you and we would be headlines by now.”
“And how did you get in anyway? I don’t remember telling you my passcode..”
“It was easy enough to find out. I just had to switch our birthdays. I figured since you like the number 8 so much there’ll be 8 numbers too on your passcode.”
“Ugh, you’re annoying when you’re right..”
Jiwon chuckled as he reached out to pinch Sunghoon’s cheeks playfully. “Aigoo, my baby. Don’t worry, it was meant to be a surprise after all. Happy anniversary babe.”
Sunghoon’s face softened and he beamed at Jiwon. “Happy birthday and happy anniversary hon.”
He sat up to give Jiwon a hug, but Jiwon captured his lips instead in a passionate kiss. Sunghoon answered back with much gusto.
“You know..” Jiwon said breathlessly when they broke apart. “I doubt I’d ever get tired of this.. of us..”
“You really shouldn’t.. I’d kick your ass if you did. But wait hon, how long are you staying?”
Jiwon smiled.. “For as long as you want.”
“Yah, seriously, though..”
“I’m serious.. I’ll be staying until you’re ready to come back with me to Hawaii.”
“You mean you’re staying?” Sunghoon’s eyes widened as Jiwon nodded. What about the hotel?”
“I left it in able hands. Besides, it’s not like I’m just gonna leave it alone.
I’d have to go back and forth every month just to check on things, and to make sure they haven’t ruined everything my parents built.”
Sunghoon was speechless. Jiwon clearly was doing it for him. He hugged him tightly, thoroughly grateful and happy.
Jiwon chuckled at his reaction. “What, you think I’d allow us to be apart again? Not a chance.” He kissed Sunghoon’s forehead, “besides I don’t think I could take being far from you.” he then kissed Sunghoon’s nose, “oh, and by the way, I should introduce myself properly.” Jiwon then smiled mischievously. “Annyeong, my name’s Eun Jiwon. I’m your new next door neighbor.”
Sunghoon’s smile could have lit up the whole room as his face brightened at what Jiwon said. He took Jiwon’s face in his hands and kissed him passionately, breaking away enough just to whisper, “I love you so much hon. Thank you.” Before capturing his lips again.
Jiwon kissed him back, abandoning all pretense. His hands gently made their way towards Sunghoon’s chest and downward, as he grabbed the hem of Sunghoon’s shirt and took it off in one swift motion. His lips left Sunghoon’s and followed the path his hands had taken, trailing kisses from Sunghoon’s neck to his shoulders to his chest, and gently took a nipple into his mouth.
Sunghoon gripped Jiwon’s head tightly as he moaned with pleasure. Jiwon continued sucking, one nipple to another. A while later, his lips travelled downward, his hands removing all layer of clothing blocking his way.
“Hon…” Sunghoon was breathless from desire.
“Yes?” said Jiwon, his voice muffled.
They made love slowly and gently, each savoring the warmth their bodies offered each other, as the reached new heights in perfect sync.
Sunghoon was humming while making breakfast when Jiwon found him, the delicious smell waking him up. He smiled automatically, as he sidled towards Sunghoon and hugged him from behind.
“Good morning babe.. You’re lively..” he noted as he kissed him on the cheek.
Sunghoon smiled at him. “Good morning. I feel good actually.. gibuni jjoa..” and he turned around to hug Jiwon tightly and kiss him..
Jiwon raised his eyebrows at him mockingly. “I thought you were cooking.”
“I’m finished.” said Sunghoon as he kissed Jiwon again. “But it’s strange. I’m more hungry for you than food.” he teased.
Jiwon smirked at him. “Careful babe.. this might really turn into a dirty kitchen.”
Sunghoon laughed at the pun. “Arasseo. Let’s go eat.”
Sunghoon sat cross-legged on the floor, his ears covered by the headphones and his laptop on the table in his living room, while he worked on his title song. He worked quietly, the clicking of the mouse can be the only sound heard.
“Hon?” Sunghoon called as he took off his headphones and looked up from his laptop.
“Yeah?” Jiwon answered from the couch, busy watching television.
“Can I get some feedback here?”
Jiwon looked at Sunghoon. “What, are you finished already?”
“Roughly…”Sunghoon said nervously. He wondered if Jiwon wound realize who the song is for.
“Let’s hear it…”
Sunghoon’s melodious voice filled the living room in a sweet, medium tempo song.
Sunghoon couldn’t hide his nervousness as Jiwon listened intently. He tried to portray his love for him through the song, so he wondered how he would react.
Love has opened her doors to me
As I watch you sleep by my side
I remember how you touch me tenderly
All these feelings I cannot hide.
Will you stay with me
Coz with you I’m complete
Let’s keep the promise we made together
All my love, to you, I’ll surrender.
Do you know how much I love you
Do you realize this love is true
Forever starts from now
Forever is our vow
With you I’m in heaven
No words need be spoken
What we have’s not wrong
I sing all this to you in a love song.
How can I ever thank you
For everything you do
You make me smile when I’m lonely
You fill my soul when it’s empty.
Do you know how much I love you
Do you realize this love is true
Forever starts from now
Forever is our vow
With you I’m in heaven
No words need be spoken
What we have’s not wrong
I sing all this to you in a love song.
You mean the world to me
And forever faithful I will be
We’ll swim against the tide together
As long as you’re by my side forever.
Honey, I love you
The last words were actually spoken. Jiwon looked at Sunghoon with eyes full of love. Sunghoon then let out a sigh of relief. He didn’t even realize that he was holding his breath.
“From how you look at me, I’m guessing you like it?”
“What’s the title?” asked Jiwon, his voice suddenly cracking.
Jiwon suddenly hugged him tight. He didn’t know what to say but the words he uttered was more than enough for Sunghoon.
“Babe… You know I love you.. Thank you..” he said softly in Sunghoon’s ear.
“It’s my birthday present hon. I should be the one thanking you. I love you so..”
Sunghoon whispered back to him.
“This one, is it your title song?”
“If it gets approved, yeah, it will be.”
“Oh, they’ll approve it. They’d be crazy not to. It’ll be a hit. But…”
Sunghoon broke off from Jiwon’s embrace and looked at him curiously. “But what?”
“You’ll probably get a lot of questions about this song. After all, you wrote it so it’ll seem personal.”
Sunghoon smiled at him. “Don’t worry about it. I can always think of an answer.”
“Of course you will.”
“Aah hon, I nearly forgot.. Mom wants to talk to you.. I called her a while ago to tell her you’re here so she might swing by later.”
Jiwon’s hand stopped caressing Sunghoon’s shoulder, suddenly tense. He never had a good encounter with Sunghoon’s mom.
“It’s okay hon.. She’s finally come to her senses about us.” comforted Sunghoon as he gently rubbed Jiwon’s shoulder. “Besides, she wants to apologize for how she treated you before..”
Jiwon cleared his throat before speaking.. “Uhm, I’m not comfortable with this meeting.”
“I won’t leave you two alone, relax..”
Jiwon took a deep breath to calm his nerves..
“Okay, okay..But know that I’m only doing this for you.”
Sunghoon smiled at him sweetly, relieved that Jiwon agreed. “I know, which is why I love you.” He kissed him gently then, savoring the softness of Jiwon’s lips in his. He had to cut it short though, knowing he had tons of work to do.
“If I didn’t need to finish an album, I swear we’d be in bed all day…”
Jiwon laughed at him. “I didn’t know you wanted me that bad..” he snickered. “If you want I can help you with that album.”
Sunghoon nodded excitedly. “That’s a grest idea hon! You can help me with the beat and melody. Remember we used to do it all the time in Jeju.”
And so, that was how they started to work on Sunghoon’s album together. They worked in perfect harmony, knowing that after this they’ll finally be free.
The meeting with Sunghoon’s mom went exceptionally well, much to Jiwon’s amazement. They talked for more than an hour, each of them apologizing for the pain they both went through. Jiwon’s heart felt lighter after all these years. He didn’t realize how badly he wanted Sunghoon’s mom to accept him until she told him…
“From now on, consider yourself as my son. You can even call me Mom. Just promise me you’ll take good care of my Sunghoon.”
Jiwon’s tears fell at those words. Sunghoon couldn’t stop his tears as well. In the past, it felt surreal to have this talk..
“Sunghoon-ah, can I talk to Jiwon privately?” Sunghoon’s mom asked gently when the emotions have died down.
“It’s okay babe.” Jiwon assured him.
“Okay… I’ll be in my room then..” Sunghoon squeezed Jiwon’s shoulder gently before he left them alone, Jiwon flashing him a grateful smile.
“Jiwon-ah, I just wanna know what your plans are.. Sunghoon says he will retire from the music scene and live in Hawaii with you. I hope you know why I’m concerned. I know I don’t have to worry about you both financially but Sunghoon might get bored doijg nothing there.”
“I’ve already thought about it. He wouldn’t be jobless, don’t worry. We’re actually planning on building our own production company. We decided to pool in a portion of our income for the start-up capital. It’ll take time but I’m confident.
He’ll have plenty to do there. Besides, everyone in the music industry knows the quality a Kang Sunghoon produced song brings. People will be requesting for him especially since he’ll no longer be tied to any agency.”
Sunghoon’s mom looked at Jiwon in awe. “I see you’ve both thought about this a lot.”
Jiwon smiled at her. “We did.. He’s happy when he’s doing music so I didn’t want that taken away from him.”
She smiled knowingly. “Yes he is, but honestly he’s more happy whenever he’s with you..”
“Mom, you’re making me blush..” Jiwon joked while Sunghoon’s mom laughed.
“I do have a request though..” Jiwon said in a more serious tone.
“Anything as long as I can give it to you.”
Jiwon took a deep breath, gathering enough courage to ask.
“I’d like your permission to marry Sunghoon.”
“Omo-na…” was all Sunghoon’s mom could say.
“I know it’s a bit of a stretch, but I want us to be legal. Once we’re settled in Hawaii, I plan to marry him. Hawaii allows same sex marriage so it wouldn’t be a problem. And I promise I won’t let that tarnish Sunghoon’s reputation. We’ll keep it quiet.” Jiwon said in a rush, knowing Sunghoon’s mom would need the assurance that Sunghoon won’t be in a scandal. “People here won’t have to know about us.”
“Well…. I knew this will come sooner or later anyway, so.. arasseo. You have my blessing.”
Jiwon’s smile could have brightened up the whole room. He stood up and gave Sunghoon’s mom a bear hug, mumbling his thanks over and over again.
Sunghoon couldn’t keep still in his room so he finally went out only to find Jiwon hugging his mom fiercely, his face alight with happiness that Sunghoon couldn’t help but smile.
“This is a nice view I’m seeing..” he said as he stepped into the living room watching them.
Jiwon let go of Sunghoon’s mom who turned around to face Sunghoon.
“Your mom just gave me the best belated birthday gift.” said Jiwon, his smile still radiant.
Sunghoon raised his eyebrows. “Mom, it must have been a really good gift.”
Sunghoon said, fascinated by the gleam in Jiwon’s eyes. “Care to tell me what it is?”
His mom just smiled mysteriously and gently nudged Jiwon with her elbow. “You’ll know when the time comes.”
Seeing as both of them didn’t want to tell him, Sunghoon didn’t push. But he was glad that they seem closer than before, his wishes finally coming true.
They spent the remainder of the day talking and laughing, and when Sunghoon’s mom finally went home, Jiwon and Sunghoon made love to each other until the wee hours of the morning.
WIND (Sunghoon’s debut song) Tears hide in my heart Memories are getting erased Our unfinished fate Is stopped here Even if we live in longing tears It’s like the scattering wind So I try to find it But it’s like an undiscoverable path I can’t hold on To the distancing fate So my heart is letting you go When the sun sets You will disappear So I’m going to place you in my eyes When darkness comes I have to forget you I need you let you go like this It’s like the scattering wind So I try to find it But it’s like an undiscoverable path I can’t hold on To the distancing fate So my heart is letting you go With your footsteps that leave me The tears that I held in, spill out It’s like the falling flower petals I mourn for you Because we need to end it like this When we meet again some day Let’s never say goodbye My love
Epilogue: A New Beginning
It took a year and a half before Sunghoon’s album was finally finished. There were 8 songs, and the album title was EIGHT. When asked why, Sunghoon said since it has been eight years after his debut he thought it would be fitting. Besides when the number eight is written sideways, it means infinity. Not to mention also that it was his favorite number. The title song, LOVE SONG, was a big hit, breaking into number one on, ironically, 8 music charts, achieving an all-kill. His song also managed to win triple crowns in all music broadcast shows making him a record holder.
8 months after release of his album promotions are still going well, with Sunghoon guesting in radio shows, variety, music broadcast and talk shows, music festivals and even cameos in dramas. Despite his busy schedule, he made it a point to spend at least an hour with Jiwon everyday even if it’s just to have coffee or to eat, but Jiwon had to go back to Hawaii and stay there for quite some time due to the hotel’s expansion. They both promised to call each other daily, since they will be apart for a while.
Meanwhile, back in Hawaii, Jiwon was busy working on Sunghoon’s legal papers regarding his residency. He was also busy on hotel expansion. After his last visit, his staff noted that they could no longer accommodate the bulk of tourists during peak season, noting that more preferred their hotel because it was cheaper and more comfortable. So Jiwon gave them the go signal for expansion. He acquired the adjacent 300 sq.m. to put up additional rooms and amenities to keep up with the competition. Because of these, he had to stay in Hawaii for a bit longer than he expected which actually stretched out for 5 months. When Sunghoon asked why he had to be there in person, he jokingly replied that this was for their future.
5 months later the expansion was almost done, with only the finishing touches to be done. Jiwon assigned his long-time friend and head of his engineering department to take charge and oversee the remainder of the construction. With his mind at ease, he went back to Korea to prepare for the most important day in his life. One that will either break him or make him whole.
Before he realized it, he only had 5 months until his contract expired. Despite the constant pushing of CEO Lee, Sunghoon wouldn’t budge. He had already made up his mind years ago and nothing was going to change that. He wanted to live a life free of worries, and he wanted to spend it with the person to whom his heart and soul belongs to. Sunghoon has no regrets, knowing that he’d already achieved far more than any other singer did, and he knew that leaving the industry while at his peak is the best way to end his career. He did tell his CEO that he’ll compose and produce their artists’ songs if he wanted to.
Sunghoon and his agency did agree to hold a press conference regarding Sunghoon’s decision. It would allow him to properly explain and say goodbye to his fans. They set the date at 2 months before his contract expiry to give ample time for everyone to accept his decision before he leaves for Hawaii.
During the press conference, Sunghoon couldn’t help but shed tears as he saw most of his fans behind the media crying and waving banners telling him not to leave and to keep on singing. He asked for their forgiveness and understanding and assured them that he’ll continue doing music, only behind the scenes this time.
Despite the initial shock of his announcement, people eventually accepted his decision, and then the issue died down and got replaced with more juicy news.
Sunghoon felt relieved and free. He no longer felt tied down and pressured. And with Jiwon by his side, he was perhaps the happiest person in the world.
It’s been 2 months since Sunghoon’s press conference. Jiwon and Sunghoon had already accomplished most of the paper work needed for Sunghoon’s residence in Hawaii. Now the only thing remaining was Jiwon’s proposal.
Jiwon enlisted the help of Sunghoon’s parents as they were the sole people who know about know about their relationship. His proposal should be perfect. This was a life changing event for all of them and everything depends on Sunghoon’s answer. He just hopes he says yes.
They decided to do it at Sunghoon’s parents’ house since it had a backyard garden mostly hidden from view. They told Sunghoon that they should have dinner altogether before the two of them left. Sunghoon agreed, but since he had to go to the agency first to say farewell to everyone, he’d be joining them later than expected. Jiwon thought it was perfect for they’ll be able to prepare freely.
Jiwon was pacing back and forth on the garden, unable to hide his nervousness.
“Jiwon-ah, sit down. You’re making me dizzy.” Sunghoon’s mom berated.
“Let him be, it’s natural for him to be nervous.” Sunghoon’s dad defended.
Jiwon sat down and wiped his sweaty hands on his pants. “I’m sorry, I can’t help it. I’m an emotional roller coaster right now, so..” Jiwon stopped in mid-sentence as his phone rang. It was Sunghoon calling.
Clearing his throat, Jiwon answered. “Hey babe..”
“Hey hon I’m on my way home. Be there in 10 minutes.”
“Hmmm…. Ppali-wa. I’m really hungry.” he joked as he signaled Sunghoon’s parents to be ready in 10 minutes.
Sunghoon laughed on the other end. “Arasseo, arasseo. I’ll be there before you know it. Save some for me!”
They ended the call with Jiwon more nervous than ever, his hands visibly shaking.
Sunghoon’s dad went up to him to pat him on the back.
“Relax Jiwon-ah.. And thank you in advance. This will really make Sunghoon happy you’ll see.” h comforted as Sunghoon’s mom nodded in agreement.
“Better take a deep breath son. We’ll get inside now and wait for Sunghoon okay?”
Jiwon did what Sunghoon’s mom said to relax himself, breathing deeply to calm himself down. “Okay, I’ll be fine now. Thank you…”
As Sunghoon’s parents made their way inside, Jiwon was a total nervous wreck. He tried not to let it show, as he stood in the shadows, hidden from view, while the garden looked exceptionally beautiful tonight.
Jiwon had placed a table in the center, and all around it was a heart shaped line of candles littered with white rose petals. On the table was a simple handwritten note that read…
“Will you be mine forever?”
Also on the table were signs written, on 2 arrows facing left and right, with the words Yes and No respectively. The Yes arrow pointing towards where Jiwon was hiding, the No arrow pointing towards the house door. Sunghoon was to pick one and follow where the arrow leads. Jiwon prayed that he’ll choose Yes for everything he worked hard for came down to this.
Sunghoon arrived at their house in high spirits. Upon entering the house he saw his dad on the couch watching tv while his Mom was busy in the kitchen.
“Hi Dad. Hi mom!” Sunghoon greeted. “Where’s ho- I mean Jiwon-hyung?”
His dad smiled. “He’s in the backyard setting things up. Since you’re here you should go help him.”
“Okay.” he cheerfully replied as he trudged up to the kitchen. “Mom, anything I can help with?”
“Go help Jiwon outside. I think he’s already gotten everything out there.”
Sunghoon trudged towards the backyard, missing the meaningful look his parents exchanged behind his back.
As Sunghoon stepped out into the garden, he stopped. He didn’t see Jiwon. Instead, he looked at what he prepared in front of him in awe.
His steps were tentative as he walked up towards the table. Suddenly, before he fully reached the table, a big white sheet of cloth unrolled from above behind it (c/o his dad), the projector’s light turned on (c/o his mom), and a slideshow began.
It was pictures and pictures of them both. From when they were kids to their teens all taken in Jeju. Then it progressed to when they were in Hawaii and when they were here in Seoul. It took only 5 minutes for the slideshow to end with a question.
What will be your answer?
The arrow clearly pointing down at the table. Tears were already forming in Sunghoon’s eyes as he walked up to the table slowly, his legs shaking.
His parents were behind him watching quietly, his mom already crying while his dad had his arm around her shoulders comforting her.
Sunghoon reached the table and read the note, his tears now falling. He didn’t even have to think about his answer as he turned to his left looking for his forever.
Jiwon stepped out from where he was hiding, and took a few steps nearer, smiling brightly as soon as Sunghoon turned towards him. He could see him crying as Sunghoon made his way slowly towards where he was standing.
He met him in between, then reached out to wipe his tears. “Don’t cry babe..”
“Hon…” Sunghoon said quietly as his lips trembled.
Jiwon smiled at him. “Let me make this formal.”
And he got down on one knee, as he held up a ring towards Sunghoon.
Sunghoon couldn’t hold back as his tears fell harder. He wasn’t expecting a proposal at all. All he knew was that they’d live together in Hawaii. For Jiwon to take the extra mile made everything more romantic, and it touched Sunghoon’s heart tremendously. He thought he couldn’t love Jiwon any deeper than how he already did, but this… it made Sunghoon love him even more.
“Will you marry me babe?”
There was no hesitation on Sunghoon’s part at all.
“Of course I’ll marry you honey. God, I love you so much…”
Jiwon got up smiling wider, and as he gently placed the ring on Sunghoon’s finger, he saw his parents watching them happily, Sunghoon’s mom crying incessantly. He wiped away Sunghoon’s tears and brought his lips to him in a quick kiss then hugging him tightly. Sunghoon cried silently on his shoulder, the proposal still fresh as his emotions ran unchecked. He managed to calm down after a while, as Jiwon gently rubbed his back.
Jiwon noticed that Sunghoon finally calmed down and whispered to him “I love you babe. I love you so much. Thank you.”
“I should thank you. You don’t know how happy I am right now. I love you now more than ever honey.” Sunghoon whispered back to him.
And as the night went on, they enjoyed a simple dinner before Jiwon and Sunghoon embarked on their new journey.
6 years later
Mari and Jisung raced across the sandy beach as Jiwon and Sunghoon watched them happily. Twins in a sense. They were both born on the same day to surrogate mothers as Jiwon and Sunghoon chose to produce through the help of in-vitro. Mari had Sunghoon’s features, in a more gentle aspect while Jisung looked so much like Jiwon.
Jiwon and Sunghoon got married a month after they arrived in Hawaii. There was no fanfare. Only Sunghoon’s parents and Jiwon’s assistant, Monica, was there. They didn’t have a fancy restaurant dinner too, instead they chose to cook for themselves at Jiwon’s home and enjoy the privacy..
Their relationship was made public after 4 years, during the time when South Korea has been more open to the LGBT community. News of their marriage got highlighted since they were the first same sex marriage in Korea’s history even if it wasn’t held in the country. Not to mention that they were famous. Kang Sunghoon being the most sought after producer and Eun Jiwon was popular among the business side, being the youngest millionaire, his hotel listed as one of the top accommodations in the world. Their marriage was widely accepted, albeit with a few denials and protests, since Kang Sunghoon was still a household name and Eun Jiwon was a chaebol daughter’s dream catch.
Sunghoon honestly no longer cared. He was as happy as can be, as he had everything he wished for and more. Jiwon, on the other hand, found it funny. Daughters of chaebols still try to seduce him, even going up to Hawaii to get close. They go home disheartened, as Jiwon already had two heirs to his name, and Jiwon wouldn’t even spare them a glance.
As they sat in the cabana, Jiwon often wondered how boring his life would be without Sunghoon and the kids. He’d probably never make it this far. He hugged Sunghoon from behind, his hands encircling his waist familiarly, and kissed him on the cheek.
“I love you babe.”
Sunghoon turned his head towards him with a smile. “I love you more hon.” and he kissed him gently, savoring the taste he knew and loved so well. It amazed Sunghoon that their love for each other didn’t fade, instead it only grew deeper and deeper as time passed. They kissed passionately until Jiwon couldn’t take it anymore.
“I want you..” he whispered hoarsely, the desire in his voice evident.
“Hon, the kids..”
Jiwon sighed. “Okay.” He held Sunghoon to him tighter. “I’ll make love to you later then.” he whispered.
They stayed there for a while before they decided to call it a day and go home.
Hand in hand, with the kids in between them, they trudged happily towards their house, a picture of a perfect family.
*Kang Sunghoon’s debut song is actually a song titled Wind sung by Jung Seung Hwan as an OST of Moon Lovers Scarlet Heart Ryeo
*The LOVE SONG song was actually a poem written by me since I couldn’t find any song having the same sentiments that Sunghoon had for Jiwon
*Mari and Jisung’s names are taken from the first syllables of Sunghoon and Jiwon’s English and Korean names. Mari from Matthew and Ricky while Jisung from Jiwon and Sunghoon. Mari is a girl while Jisung is a boy
*To everyone who enjoyed this fanfic, thank you for your warm words and support. I honestly didn’t know how the story would progress when I first started. I wasn’t even expecting any subscriber and for me to even reach a 100 was a dream. Thank you to everyone who laughed, cried and cursed with me throughout Kang Sunghoon and
Eun Jiwon’s story. Please do support my upcoming fanfic anytime soon. Thank you again and keep supporting our Oppa-deul. Sechskies jjang!!! Yellowkies jjang!!! “