The Beginning by: Jekki Girl

the beginning.png

  • a EunKang fanfic
  • completed

WARNING: contains mature content

Ch. 1

Her hand had now made it’s way to his thigh, ever so slowly inching up. He stared straight ahead, not even blinking, just concentrating on the movie. He ignored her small subtle movements as she shifted her body to lean against his shoulder. He could smell her faint perfume, trying to tempt him, trying to lure him to her….. He sighed inwardly, almost out of boredom. She was too easy, too eager.

No challenge whatsoever.

Her fingers moved in slow circles, snaking her way up even further. She was starting to irriate him now. He then placed his hand over hers, stopping her movements. He turned to face her.

She smiled sexily to him, her face inches away. Jiwon studied her for a second. Her straight jet black hair framed her slim face, contrasting with her pale yet flawless complexion. Her long eyelashes fluttered slightly, hiding her perfectly almond-shaped eyes as she prepared herself to kiss him, her pink lips beginning to pucker.

She was one of the most eligible girls at his school and Jiwon already knew he had her.

He looked at her now with slight disdain, but decided to lean over.

As she waited expectantly for their lips to meet, he whispered softly in her ear, “I need to pee,”

She opened her eyes immediately in surprise, but recovered quickly, flashing him a dazzling smile and nodded.

Jiwon got up and walked out the theater. As soon as he was out, he rolled his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. He wanted this date to hurry and be done with — he was bored out of his mind. He contemplated whether he should make up an excuse saying there was a family emergencey and that they had to leave right now or……

Or he could just leave.

He liked the latter idea.

~10 minutes later~

Jiwon revved up his BMW, loving the purring sound his engine made… He began to smile to himself as he slipped on his sunglasses, turned up the radio, allowing the bass to overwhelm his body, and shifted his gear to drive.

Suddenly, his cell phone rang. He answered it immediately.

“Whachoo want?” he answered, turning down the volume.

“Hyung – it’s Jiyong. Where you at?” Jiyong asked.

“Juss driving around…Why, wassup?” Jiwon replied curiously.

“Meet us at the club ~ lots of girls tonight,” Jiyong said, grinning.

Jiwon sighed for the second time that night. He began nearing an intersection.

“What’s wrong?” Jiyong demanded.

“I’m so bored….I can’t find any girl worth my effort these days,” he complained.

“I’m sure you’ll find one tonight — Just hurry up and come!” Jiyong said. While Jiyong was talking, Jiwon saw the traffic light turn yellow. He accelerated, wanting to get through the intersection. It then turned red, but Jiwon was going too fast to brake in time, so he had to go through it.

“Ok ok,” Jiwon said, giving in, not concentrating too much on his driving. He had nothing better to do. “I’ll meet you –”

Suddenly, a car appeared in front of Jiwon. He dropped his phone and slammed on his

brakes as hard as he could, his hands gripping the steering wheel fiercely…his tires screeched trying to stop, and all he could smell was rubber burning as he skidded……

And Jiwon knew he couldn’t – wouldn’t be able to stop in time. He braced himself, tensing his whole body for the crash and looked up for a split second before shutting his eyes tightly — the look of absolute terror on the stranger’s face forever imprinted in his mind…..


Jiwon moaned, his head throbbing. He slowly opened his eyes, his vision blurry…..his mind unfocused…. All he knew was that his head hurt like hell. He blinked a couple of times, his vision now beginning to clear up. He looked up at the flourescent lights that shone above him. Then he realized he was in the hospital. He turned his head slowly to the side and saw his mother sleeping uncomfortably next to his bedside. He moved his arm, wincing at the soreness of his muscles and shook his mother’s hand gently.

She woke up immediately from his touch, looking up with an expression of distress as if expecting bad news. Her look then changed to an expression of pure relief.

She clasped his hand tightly, closing her eyes, tears of joy streaming down her cheeks -saying a silent prayer of thanks.

Jiwon smiled weakly, but it hurt his face to even smile. He tried to speak instead.

“Unnngg…” he croaked.

“Sh…sh…Jiwon-ah, you’re going to be ok…. The doctor said you were very lucky…” his mother said softly, touching his cheek comfortingly.

“Wha….What about….the other….per…person…” Jiwon managed to say.

Jiwon’s mother looked away, blinking back some tears. He held his mother’s hand tensely.

She finally spoke, her voice on the verge of breaking.

“The…..the person you hit…..they’re paralyzed Jiwon…..”


Jiwon walked slowly to the door. He had already spent a couple of days in the hospital recooperating, suffering by a miracle from minor cuts and bruises, and was able to leave the hospital that day….but before he left, he needed to see…..

He looked through the small window and saw a girl lying there…..her eyes closed peacefully…. He decided to go in, entering the room as quietly as possible, not wanting to disturb the sleeping girl. He crept soflty towards the bed….every step squeezing his heart painfully. He couldn’t believe that her life was changed completely now because of him….

Jiwon looked at the her more closely, a bandage covered her head wound, she had a purple bruise on her right cheek and her upper lip held a couple of stitches.

Amazingly, her eyes were the only part of her that remained untouched. Her long black eyelashes remained closed. She was so beautiful though…..his heart began to beat faster……

She suddenly moved, moaning in pain. Jiwon felt a lump in his throat, and then suddenly overwhelmed with feelings of guilt, turned away with a choked cry. He began to walk away from the bed.

“Who are you?” a low husky voice called out.

Jiwon froze and slowly turned around to face her.

“I…..I…” Jiwon stuttered.

She looked at him with her enormous brown eyes. Jiwon was completely mesmorized by them. They stared at one another.

“You did this to me….” she said finally, in a hoarse voice.

Jiwon shamefully nodded his head, looking down, now unable to face her.

“How old are you?” she suddenly asked softly.

The question surprised Jiwon. “I’m 23,” Jiwon said quietly.

The big eyes remained on him, continuing to stare. “I don’t have any family,” she whispered, tears beginning to fill her eyes.

Jiwon stepped forward closer to the bed.

“I don’t have anybody,” she whispered sadly. Jiwon understood.

“I’ll take care of you,” Jiwon said softly.

Her big brown eyes looked up at him, brightening a little.

“Rest for now, I’ll come back later,” Jiwon commanded gently. Then he turned to leave.

“Ok, Hyung,”

Jiwon froze again for a second time. He whirled around to face HER.

The girl smiled at him shyly. Jiwon felt his eyes grow wide, but he forced himself to nod and then finally walked out.

As he closed the door, he leaned against the wall, not believing he mistakened the guy for a girl. He then saw the chart outside the room, hanging in the dispenser.

He quickly grabbed the chart and scanned over the page and found what he was looking for.

Kang Sung Hoon


Jiwon lay in his bed at home, his arms crossed over his chest thinking…

He was thinking about those enormous beautiful eyes… they seemed so fragile, in need…like they needed him…

Kang Sunghoon….Sunghoon…….


Jiwon walked quietly down the corrider of the hospital. It was three in the morning and he just couldn’t sleep so he decided to see Sunghoon.

He opened the door and to his surprise, Sunghoon sat there upright in his bed, looking at him expectantly, as if knowing that he would come.

“Hyung…you came!” Sunghoon said happily, smiling.

Jiwon couldn’t help but smile back.


Sunghoon explained that he was paralyzed from the waist down, but the doctor said that with a lot of patience and therapy, there could be a chance for him to walk again.

“You’ll help me right Hyung?” Sunghoon asked, his brown eyes once again staring at


Jiwon looked down at Sunghoon’s bed, his bedsheets covering his legs. “Of course…”

Jiwon mumbled. An awkward silence passed between them.

“Can you feel anything at all?” Jiwon asked finally.

Sunghoon shook his head sadly. “No….nothing..” he whispered.

“Concentrate, look at your feet, try to move them,” Jiwon said, kneeling down by his bedside.

Sunghoon stared hard at his feet, willing them to move. He gripped the bed, his knuckles turning white, his face scrunching up, trying his hardest to move them. They remained still.

Jiwon watched him painfully….trying so hard…. Sunghoon’s eyes filled with tears, as he finally gave up. He wiped his tears with his fists, starting to cry.

Jiwon didn’t know what came over him, but he suddenly took Sunghoon’s hand into his, holding it. He was shocked at the warmness of Sunghoon’s hand.

Sunghoon’s lower lip trembled, as he looked down at his lap.

“I’m…I’m sorry…I can’t do it…” Sunghoon said weakly. A tear fell onto his bedsheet.

Jiwon reached over and wiped his tears away with his fingers. An overwhelming feeling of wanting to take care of him…to comfort him, fell on Jiwon…. He touched Sunghoon’s cheek lightly…it was so so soft……….

Sunghoon closed his eyes as their skin touched, but then reopened them, as if feeling a little better.

“You’re going to do it — We’re going to do it,” Jiwon said determinedly.


For the past several weeks, everyday after school, Jiwon went straight to the hospital to help Sunghoon with his therapy. On one particular day, Jiwon was walking out the school to his car, when Jiyong called out to him.

“Jiwon – where you going? Let’s go watch a movie,” Jiyong said, in a cheerful mood.

“Sorry Jiyong, next time. I have to go to the hospital,” Jiwon replied.

“Again?? To help that guy? Doesn’t he have anybody else to take care of him?” Jiyong asked, a little annoyed. Jiwon had been spending all his free time at the hospital these days, never hanging out with him and the other guys.

“I mean, how can he have NO ONE to take care of him? There’s something wrong with him if he has no one…” Jiyong continued.

Jiwon started to get angry. “What do you mean there’s something wrong with him?” he demanded, his eyes narrowing.

“I’m juss sayin –” Jiyong started, but Jiwon suddenly shoved him.

Jiyong eyes widened in surprise as Jiwon’s sudden outburst of anger.

“What the hell is your problem?” Jiyong snapped, starting to get angry also.

“Just keep your mouth shut, you talk too much,” Jiwon ordered and got into his car.

Jiyong gave him a look of disgust as he drove away.


Jiwon sped away, fuming. He was breathing hard. Why had he lashed out at Jiyong like that? He didn’t understand why he had acted so harshly….. but then again, he didn’t like what Jiyong had been saying….it had triggered something in him…

Jiwon rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on. He got onto the highway, heading towards the hospital. A couple minutes passed, when he started to notice the car behind tail-gating him.

“What the fock is their problem…” he muttered. He moved into the right lane. The car followed him, almost kissing his bumper.

Jiwon changed back into the left lane. The car again followed him.

He looked into his rear-view mirror, but couldn’t make out the face of the driver, due to the sun’s reflection off the car’s window.

His jaw tightened as he accelerated and began weaving through the lanes ignoring the honks from other cars, trying to lose the tail-gating bastard. But the car nevertheless, managed to stick to him.

Finally, the hospital exit came up and to his dismay, the car followed him off the ramp.

He pulled up into the hospital lot, parked quickly and got out, furious, as the car pulled in next to him.

She stepped out of the car swiftly… was the beautiful girl that he had taken to the movies the other day.

Damn, what was her name….Jiwon thought, his mind racing.

She walked up to him, her black sunglasses shielding her eyes.

“Why were you following me?” Jiwon demanded angrily.

“Because I had to tell you something….” she said calmly, taking off her glasses, looking at him pleasantly.

“Which is…” Jiwon prompted, raising an eyebrow.

She slapped him.

He felt the sharp stinging on his cheek. His face burned.

“That’s all I needed to tell you..” the girl said smiling now, putting her sunglasses back on and walked back into her car, and drove off.

Jiwon closed his eyes sighing.


“What happened?” Sunghoon asked, as Jiwon walked in. Jiwon’s face was pink.

“Nothing,” Jiwon said shortly, putting his keys down on a nearby table.

Sunghoon held a look of hurt on his face. Jiwon ignored it and walked over to the bed.

“You ready?” Jiwon ordered, more than asked.

“Yes,” Sunghoon said in a small voice.

He yanked off his bedsheets, noticing Sunghoon’s Mickey Mouse boxers and pale white legs. Sunghoon jumped from his abruptness.

“Lay down,” Jiwon said gruffly.

Sunghoon obediently began to lie down, but he struggled some…

Jiwon impatiently took Sunghoon’s legs and pulled his body down, now allowing

Sunghoon to lie flat on his back.

“Thank you,” Sunghoon said softly. Jiwon grunted in return, beginning the therapy.

He lifted Sunghoon’s left leg, he held it gingerly – it was so limp…. He pushed it towards Sunghoon’s chest slowly.

push forward – pull out

push forward – pull out

In order to keep from Sunghoon’s leg muscles from deteriorating, this pushing and pulling had to be done repeatedly daily. Usually the two talked during this time, but

Jiwon wasn’t in the mood today…

He switched to the right leg, mechanically moving his legs.

“Are you acting like this because of a girl?” Sunghoon asked, looking up at the ceiling.

Jiwon didn’t reply.

“I can tell…it’s because of a girl. Your face is pink,” Sunghoon commented.

“My face isn’t pink,” Jiwon interjected.

“Yes it is!” Sunghoon insisted.

“Shut up,” Jiwon said irritated, “Why do you care anyways?” he muttered under his breath. He pushed Sunghoon’s leg forward a little roughly. Like it matters…he still can’t feel anything… Jiwon thought to himself.

“I care……about you…..” he said quietly, reaching over and placing his hand on Jiwon’s wrist.

Jiwon glanced over at the pale boy lying in front of him, helpless….

He immediately felt guilty for being rough with him….he placed Sunghoon’s leg down, and strangely, just from Sunghoon’s simple touch, his pulse began to quicken…..

Sunghoon gently squeezed his wrist and then released him, closing his eyes.

Eventually, he fell asleep, breathing in and out deeply. Jiwon stood there silently watching him….

Then slowly, without his realizing what he was doing…. his heart pounding….Jiwon placed his hands on Sunghoon’s leg again, touching his smooth and soft calf. He slowly began to massage the calf, in small circles, his fingers moving in almost an erotic motion….Sunghoon’s lips parted, he was breathing deeply now, but his eyes remained closed, still asleep.

Jiwon concentrated hard, just wanting to feel him…..He knew Sunghoon couldn’t feel what he was doing….so he continued…..he could feel the blood pumping in his ears…His fingers now moved tenderly to his thigh, he started from the top, making his way around the thigh, one hand alone dared to squeeze Sunghoon’s inner thigh…..

“Ahem!” a deep voice coughed from behind.

Jiwon’s hands pulled back from Sunghoon, as if he had been touching fire…..

“Hello boys!” the doctor greeted them amicably. Jiwon’s face was now REALLY pink.

“Hey doc…” Sunghoon said, waking up. He rubbed his eyes and started to sit up. Jiwon tried to nod to the doctor nonchalantly.

“How’s he doing today?” the doctor inquired.

“Um….good, I guess……” Jiwon said dumbly, still trying to recover.

“Well, Sunghoon, have you told Jiwon the good news?” the doctor asked, with a twinkle in his eye.

Sunghoon laughed and shook his head.

“What? What good news?” Jiwon demanded.

“Our Sunghoon here….” the doctor paused dramatcially, “He can FEEL his legs now!” the doctor announced, grinning.

Jiwon’s eyes widended. The realization struck him….Sunghoon had felt everything he had done….. He suddenly felt like he couldn’t breathe….

The doctor gave more instructions to the two about changing the therapy exercises, but Jiwon was hardly listening. All that was going through his mind was that Sunghoon knew what Jiwon had been doing to him….

Soon the doctor left and the two of them were alone.

Jiwon’s whole body tensed as Sunghoon watched him. Jiwon stared at the floor, not blinking, breathing hard.

“Why didn’t you tell me…..” Sunghoon gazed at him, smiling faintly.


“Why….didn’t you tell me you could feel your legs?” Jiwon repeated, his voice rough.

Sunghoon looked directly into his eyes.

“Why did you touch me like that?” he asked softly.

Jiwon reddened.

“I…….uh……I was just……massaging your legs…..” he said weakly.

Sunghoon nodded slowly and smiled a knowing smile.

“And I just wanted to surprise you….” he replied back simply.

They stood there in silence and then Jiwon decided he couldn’t stand it anymore. He spun on his heels, needing to get out…..

He could still feel Sunghoon’s eyes watching him as he left the room….


Jiwon paced the hallway, walking back and forth, back and forth. What was wrong with him? Why HAD he touched Sunghoon like that? It was as if some magnetic force had overtaken him, drawn him towards Sunghoon and made him have to touch him….. He had to satisfy his urge……

Jiwon closed his eyes, his heart beating rapidly….he usually didn’t feel this way unless….unless he liked — it was almost as if….as if he was attracted to Sunghoon….

He shook his head, “No….no….that’s not it,” he said to himself. But the images, his enormous eyes, his mesmerizing stare, his soft silky skin….he couldn’t get it out of his mind….

“NO!!!” Jiwon almost shouted. Nurses and nearby patients, stopped what they were doing and turned to stare at him. He looked away, flustered.

Why was he thinking about him like this? He slumped against the wall, confused….

“I was just trying to help him, that’s all….” Jiwon said softly, trying to reassure himself.

He stood there quietly, calming himself down, but a small tiny seed of doubt was growing in him already…..

“No….no…’s not like that….I’m NOT like that….” he whispered.


As Jiwon entered Sunghoon’s room again, he saw that Sunghoon had laid back down, his back turned away from the door.

Jiwon cleared his throat so that Sunghoon knew he was in the room. Sunghoon remained still.

Jiwon, not knowing what to really say or do, just walked over to his bed.

“Sunghoon? Are you sleeping?” he asked quietly.

No response.

Not wanting to disturb him, Jiwon decided to get his things and leave. He picked up his keys and was about to head home, when he heard Sunghoon’s soft sigh.

He glanced back at Sunghoon and noticed his shoulders shaking slightly……as if he was crying…..

Jiwon slowly walked back over to the bed, where Sunghoon was facing, and found him wiping away his tears.

“What’s wrong?? Why are you crying?” Jiwon asked a bit alarmingly.

“H-h-hyung, what am I going to do? I….I don’t have anywhere to stay….” he responded forlornly.

“What are you talking about? You’re going to stay in the hospital!” Jiwon said, his brow furrowing.

“No hyung, didn’t you listen to the doctor a minute ago? He said I could go home to recuperate…..but I don’t HAVE a home to go to….” Sunghoon whimpered.

Jiwon frowned, but then remembered that because he was so shocked by the doctor’s news about Sunghoon, he hadn’t paid attention to what the doctor had said after that.

And now… Sunghoon needed help…. His heart ached to see him cry…. Without really thinking, he placed his hand on Sunghoon’s shoulder.

“Do…do you want to….stay with me?” Jiwon asked softly.

Sunghoon’s tears stopped. He turned to look up at Jiwon, his eyes glistening.

“You would let me stay with you?” Sunghoon asked, almost in a whisper.

Jiwon shifted uncomfortably with his feet.

“Well…I mean, I want to …..well…I….after all, I-I said I would….” Jiwon mumbled, scratching the back of his head, not looking at him.

“You said you would what?” Sunghoon asked questioningly. Jiwon coughed. “Um….I said I would take care of you….” he finished, embarrassed. He kept his eyes glued to the floor.

Sunghoon began to smile.


“Morning,” Jiwon greeted gruffly, letting himself into Sunghoon’s room. He was holding a tray of fluffy scrambled eggs, sizzling bacon, golden brown toast, fresh bowl of fruit, and a tall glass of orange juice.

Sunghoon rubbed his eyes lazily, slowly propping himself up, blinking.

“What’s this hyung?” he asked, giving a small yawn.

“I made breakfast for you — before I go to school,” Jiwon said proudly.

To Jiwon’s dismay, Sunghoon, too tired, yawned again and pulled the covers back over his head.

“Hyung, I’ll eat it later….I want to sleep some more,” he mumbled sleepily.

Jiwon felt himself grow irritated. He brought the tray down roughly on the bed, right next to Sunghoon.

“Eat NOW!” he barked.

Sunghoon jumped from his loud voice. He quickly sat up and grabbed a piece of toast and bit off a corner, chewing rapidly.

Jiwon smiled broadly now, watching Sunghoon scarf down his food. Within ten minutes, Sunghoon had finished everything.

Satisfied, Jiwon bent down to pick up the dishes and tray.


Sunghoon looked at Jiwon questioningly while gulping down his orange juice.

“Huh…That’s strange, who could that be?” Jiwon muttered. “I’ll be right back,” he said to Sunghoon, closed his door and walked over to the front door.

He opened the door and to his surprise, he faced a smiling Jiyong.

“Hey~” Jiyong greeted cheerfully.

“What are you doing here?” Jiwon asked surprised.

“Jahshik…I came here to take you to school,” Jiyong replied.

“Oh…oh, ok. Gimme a second then. Come on in,” Jiwon said, knowing this was Jiyong’s way of apologizing for his previous behavior.

“Thanks! By the way, what happened to that kid from the hospital?” Jiyong asked, his eyes full of curiosity.

“Oh…uh, he’s in the guest room…He’s staying with me for a little bit….” Jiwon said, trying to act nonchalantly, like it was a totally normal thing to have a strange guy stay at your house.

Jiyong stared at Jiwon in disbelief, but quickly recovered.

“Oh….cool. Can I see him?” he asked.

“Uh…Sure,” Jiwon said shrugging his shoulders. “He’s in that room…Go see him while I go get my stuff for school,” he said, pointing to the room.

Jiyong nodded and Jiwon turned to get his stuff.

Jiyong slowly walked over to the door and knocked gingerly on it.

“Come in,” a soft voice replied.

Jiyong entered and found himself staring at a young looking boy. He closed the door behind him.

They looked at one another when Jiyong finally cleared his throat to speak.

“Um….My name is….” he began.

“Jiyong. I know,” Sunghoon finished for him matter-of-factly with a smile. Jiwon had told him about his friends.

Jiyong stared at him, his mouth hanging open. He realized this and quickly closed it.

“And you are…..” he trailed off.

“Sunghoon. Kang Sunghoon,” Sunghoon replied easily.

“Kang Sunghoon….I see….” Jiyong said, repeating his name. His lips then turned upwards into a perfect smile.

“You know……You can’t take him away from me,” Jiyong said, who continued to smile but stared hard at him.

Sunghoon returned his stare, not even flinching.

“You’re right….” Sunghoon replied finally.

Jiyong relaxed, his smile getting bigger.

But to his surprise, Sunghoon continued.

“He’s ALREADY mine………”


“I don’t like to share what’s mine….” Sunghoon said quietly.

Jiyong began to laugh. The corners of Sunghoon’s lips pulled down to a slight frown.

“What’s so funny?” asked a curious Jiwon, standing in the doorway.

Jiyong quickly cleared his throat.

“Oh, nothing…. He’s a cute kid Jiwon,” Jiyong remarked, grinning over at Jiwon.

Sunghoon looked down at his hands, hearing the haughtiness in his tone.

Jiwon reddened slightly. “Uh…. yeah….We better get going Jiyong……” he said, quickly changing the subject. Jiwon motioned for him to leave and left the room.

Jiyong slowly turned to Sunghoon.

“Nice meeting you Sunghoon,” he said with a touch of sarcasm, offering his hand.

Sunghoon glanced at him, and slowly raised his hand to Jiyong’s, shaking it robotically.

Jiyong’s grip immediately tightened over Sunghoon’s, almost crushing his fingers… if……… a warning……

Sunghoon winced in pain, biting his lip to keep himself from crying out. But before he could say anything, Jiyong then released his grip and walked off, smirking.

Sunghoon watched him leave out of the corner of his eyes……

Suddenly, Jiwon returned to the room.

“Um, if you need anything, just tell the ah-joh-mah….. She’ll help you….ok?” he said gently.

Sunghoon stared directly into Jiwon’s eyes.

“When are you coming home?” he asked softly.

“Uh….. right after school gets out…. We’ll work on your therapy then, ok?” Jiwon promised.

“Right after school?” Sunghoon asked.

“Right after school,” Jiwon said firmly.

Sunghoon treated him to one of his charming smiles.

“Ok!” he said happily.

Jiwon smiled too.


In Jiyong’s car….

They rode in silence. Jiwon drank his coke silently while Jiyong tapped his steering wheel methodically…. thinking…..

He had known Jiwon for a long time now…. over ten years, actually. The two had been good friends ever since elementary school… Jiyong remembered when they first met.


He was new to the elementary school and he didn’t have any friends. During recess everyday, he was constantly bullied and teased by the other kids. But one day, it all changed…..

“Haha…Look at that bean pole! He’s a freak….so tall and his neck is so long, he’s like a giraffe!” yelled the school bully. “Giraffe! Giraffe!” the bully chanted. Other kids soon joined in, pointing and laughing at him.

Jiyong stood there humiliated. He knew he was tall for his age and thus, always stood out from the other kids. And he hated it. He hated being tall. Why couldn’t he just be short like all the other Korean kids? He lowered his head in shame, trying to hold his tears back.

“Giraffe! You FREEEE —–” the bully was suddenly cut off. The kids gasped in shock.

Jiyong looked up to see why he had stopped his shouting.

There stood Jiwon, breathing hard, his hands clenched. The bully was on the ground, his nose bleeding profusely from Jiwon’s punch.

“What did he ever do to you!!!!” Jiwon yelled at him. The bully glared at Jiwon angrily, wiping his blood from his nose with the back of his hand.

“What makes you so great to call him that?” Jiwon sneered at him. The bully tried to get up, but Jiwon kicked in the stomach. He groaned painfully.

“ANSWER ME……” Jiwon shouted. All the kids watched in awe.

The bully moaned in return.

“Apologize to him right now, and don’t ever let me catch you even LOOKING in his direction…” Jiwon ordered threateningly.

“I’m…..s-s-soh….reee….” the bully whispered weakly.

“I CAN’T HEAR YOU…..” Jiwon barked.

“I’m sorry…..I’m sorry Jiyong,” the bully managed to say more loudly.

Satisfied, Jiwon turned around and walked away. The kids now began laughing at the humilated bully.

But Jiyong wasn’t watching the bully. His eyes followed Jiwon…..

It was as if Jiwon knew Jiyong was watching him….He turned around and his eyes locked with Jiyong’s. Jiwon nodded towards the new boy, and Jiyong then walked over to him and from that point on, they were inseparable.

And Jiyong knew then, that he wanted Jiwon to be his……


“Ahem….Uh…….Did you finish all your homework?” Jiyong said, trying to start a conversation.



Jiyong decided to take another approach.

“You know what? I think that kid, Sunghoon…… he has a crush on you or something…..”

Jiyong commented innocently, as Jiwon was in the midst of drinking.

As soon as he heard that, Jiwon began coughing uncontrollably, from swallowing the wrong way. “What?! What are you talking about?!!” he sputtered, wiping his mouth. His eyes were wide open.

“I think…no, I KNOW he likes you,” Jiyong replied simply, noting his reaction.

“Hahaha…FUNNY, Jiyong,” he retorted, but looked out the window, trying to hide his true reaction. Jiwon felt his pulse quicken…… from being pleased with Jiyong’s comment…… He remembered Sunghoon smiling him before he left for school…..and he again, smiled.

And although Jiyong was looking at the back of Jiwon’s head, his eyes shifted and he saw from the passenger window reflection…….Jiwon’s small smile…….


After school….

Jiwon looked at his watch impatiently. He specifically told Jiyong to meet him in the parking lot right after school….but ten mintues had already passed since school let out for the day.

“This is the last time I get a ride from him….” he muttered to himself. He sighed…..

Sunghoon was waiting for him….

Finally, Jiwon spotted his tall friend, walking casually towards him.

“Hurry up Jiyong!” Jiwon called out, irritated. Jiyong picked up his pace a little.

“Hey Jiwon… Let’s go get something to eat. I’m starving!” Jiyong suggested cheerfully.

“Sorry — I need to get home,” Jiwon retorted shortly as the two got into the car.

“Why? Because of Sunghoon? He can wait a little bit…..” Jiyong said, beginning to feel himself grow jealous.

“I need to get home,” Jiwon repeated stubbornly.

Jiyong sighed and started the engine.

On the way to Jiwon’s house, Jiyong suddenly pulled over, parking the car.

“What the…… What are you doing?” Jiwon asked, his brow raised as Jiyong got out of the car.

“Hold on for one second, I need to pick up something real quick….” Jiyong said and quickly ran into the store.

A minute later, Jiyong came out wearing a triumphant grin. Jiwon watched him curiously, carrying a cd.

He got back into the car and gently threw the cd onto Jiwon’s lap.

“What’s this…….” Jiwon asked. And then his eyes widened.

He was looking at the newly-released FINAL FANTASY IX…..

Jiwon’s hands trembled as he picked up the cd, he felt himself growing excited.

“Well, off to your house right?” Jiyong said pleasantly, starting the engine.

Jiwon swallowed hard. His hands were just itching to play the new game….. but his mother had banned video games from his house for some time, and Jiyong’s house was the only other place to play it……..

“Uh…ah…..hey, well, since you just got this game….let’s just check it out…..” Jiwon suggested feebly.

“You have time to? I thought you had to see Sunghoon…..” Jiyong said innocently.

“He…..he can wait….. Let’s just play for a little bit…..ok?” Jiwon said.

Jiyong grinned as they made their way over to his house.


4 hours later….

“DIE DIE!!” Jiwon yelled at the television screen.


“Man…. Final Fantasy IX is awesome!!” Jiwon exclaimed. He had lost 10 times in a row.

It was much more challenging and that’s why he liked it so much…

Jiyong laughed. “You’re addicted to video games Jiwon, you know that?” he said.

“I’m not addicted….. Besides, I think I’m getting better at this…. With a little more practice, I’ll be able to get through the first stage….” Jiwon said cockily, cracking his knuckles.

Jiyong laughed some more. Jiwon stretched out his arms, yawning.

“What time is it anyways?” he muttered. He looked at his watch. 9:13 PM.

“Damn!!! I’ve been here that long???” he nearly shouted. He quickly got up, grabbing his backpack. Where had the time gone…….

Jiyong got up. “Do you need a ride?” he offered.

“No,no…don’t worry, I’ll take a taxi home…. Dammit….” Jiwon cursed, angry at himself for not keeping track of the time. Sunghoon was waiting……

“I’ll see you tomorrow Jiyong!” Jiwon called out and ran out the door.

Jiyong closed the door, and went to his room, whistling happily.


Jiwon paused, taking a deep breath before knocking on Sunghoon’s door.

tap, tap

No answer.

He decided to let himself in quietly. Sunghoon was already sleeping.

Jiwon sighed guiltily, watching Sunghoon resting.

“I’m sorry Sunghoon…..” he whispered.

“It’s okay Jiwon hyung,” Sunghoon whispered back.

Jiwon’s mouth dropped open from surprise. Sunghoon’s eyes slowly opened.

“Where did you go?” he asked.

“I…..” Jiwon couldn’t bring himself to tell him he had spent the last four hours playing a video game.

“It’s okay…. You don’t have to tell me……” Sunghoon said softly and closed his eyes again.

“Sunghoon…..” Jiwon began, and touched his shoulder.

“Don’t touch me…..” he said. Jiwon pulled his hand away, feeling terrible.

“Stand at the foot of the bed,” Sunghoon ordered quietly.

Jiwon, with some uncertainty, did as he was told.

Then to his amazement, Sunghoon slowly got out of bed….. and with small baby like steps, began to walk towards Jiwon…….

He eventually made it to where Jiwon was standing…..smiling proudly….

“This is what I was doing while you were gone….” Sunghoon said happily.

Jiwon’s face broke into a grin.

“This is awesome! You can start walking now!” he exclaimed, thrilled with the good news.

“Yeah…..but it’s really tiring to even just walk that much….” Sunghoon explained wearily, holding onto the edge of the bed now.

“Yeah, I bet…..You should take it easy…..” Jiwon said nodding, “But this is great news!” he exclaimed.

Sunghoon laughed, his eyes sparkling, as he sat on the bed to rest.

Jiwon sat next to him, patting his shoulder in congratulations.

“Wow….I’m so happy for you……” Jiwon said, chuckling. “I’m so happy, I could just kiss you!” he added, laughing.

Sunghoon gazed over at Jiwon, his expression serious now, and spoke sofly.

“Why don’t you……….”


They stared at one another.

Jiwon was speechless. Did he just say to……..

Sunghoon continued to stare into his eyes. And then he ever so slowly began leaning forward towards Jiwon…..

Jiwon froze, holding his breath. His heart hammering wildly in his chest…… Sunghoon leaned in even closer….

His face was now inches away from Jiwon’s…. His breath lightly tickling Jiwon’s cheek, creating an arousing effect on Jiwon…..

Jiwon shut his eyes tightly…….preparing himself….

And then….. then……. nothing happened.

Jiwon slowly opened his eyes warily….. And saw that Sunghoonhad backed away and was smiling at him.

“Hyung? You okay?” Sunghoon asked, a twinkle in his eye.

Jiwon felt his face on fire.

“Uh…Yeah, I’m okay,” he mumbled in return, abruptly getting up from the bed.

“You better get some sleep,” Sunghoon said while crawling back into his bed, “You look kind of tired,” he added, still smiling at him.

All Jiwon could do was nod.


He lay in bed, tossing and turning. Just unable to sleep or even come close to yawning.

It was crazy. The way Sunghoon was making him feel….

Jiwon slapped his face, trying to knock some sense into himself……

“Stop thinking about him Jiwon,” he said, “You don’t like boys. You like GIRLS,” he muttered.

But……..Sunghoon was different……

Jiwon groaned. It was going to be along night.


Jiwon left the house early in the morning for school, avoiding Sunghoon. He was confused, very unsure of his feelings….. All these thoughts distracted him as he entered the school. And he just could not get his mind off of Sunghoon……


He ran smack into a girl, knocking her to the ground.

Jiwon quickly bent down to help her, to see if she was alright. And then he realized it was the same girl from the movies…..

“I’m so sorry…. I wasn’t watching where I was going…uh….” Jiwon apologized. Her name……Jiwon thought…Damn, he still couldn’t remember.

“It’s Jiyun, remember?” she snapped. Jiwon embarassed, offered his hand to her.

Jiyun roughly grabbed his hand to help herself up, but she was obviously still mad.

“Nice running into you,” she said sarcastically, and walked the other way, brushing the dirt off her clothes.

Then Jiwon suddenly had an idea.

“Jiyun! Wait up!!” he called out.


Jiwon raced home. He didn’t have much time. He threw his backpack, on the floor of his room and began rummaging through his closet to find something clean to wear.

He finally decided on a black v-neck sweater and jeans and went to the bathroom to gel his hair and spritz some cologne on.

Jiwon studied his reflection carefully. As usual, he looked good. He smiled at the mirror.

Now he was ready for his date.


He picked her up twenty minutes later and they were off to the movie theater for the premiere of Mission Impossible 2. Jiyun looked beautiful as usual, but she still remained distant from Jiwon. It had taken all of his persuasive skills to convince her to give him another chance and evenutally, she gave in.

Jiwon casually slipped his arm around her waist, she didn’t resist. He led her into the theater and chose to sit in the very last row, the very back.

“Do you want something to eat? Popcorn or anything?” he asked. She shook her head no. They settled into their seats as the movie began.

Within the first 20 minutes, Jiwon had already moved his arm around her shoulder. But to Jiwon’s surprise, she remained stiff and upright in her seat.

Instead of watching the movie, Jiwon focused on her…. Jiyun stared straight ahead at the movie.

He leaned towards her, smelling her hair. It smelled like roses. He hated roses. He stopped breathing in and then moved closer to her, nuzzling her neck. He then raised his head and brushed his lips against her soft cheek. He heard her breathe in sharply…

And then he knew she was getting turned on.

Jiwon brought his hand to her face, turning her head towards him and he met her lips sofly. Carefully and gently prying her mouth open with his expert kisses. She opened her mouth and their tongues touched, each exploring the taste of the other. Jiwon’s hands held her face as they continued to kiss, but now Jiyun wanted more….

She leaned closer towards him, her breathing uneven, touching his firm chest, then to his stomach, and finally even lower…..

Jiwon abruptly stopped kissing her and pushed her away.

His heart was pounding. He didn’t want her touch him like that. Jiwon wiped his lips, trying to get rid of the taste of her lipstick.

“Fuck you Jiwon,” Jiyun hissed, got up and stormed out of the theater, ignoring the dirty looks people gave her as she exited.

A handful of people were staring at him, some curious, some laughing. Full of embarassment, Jiwon too, left the theater.


She was nowhere in sight. Jiwon sighed as he searched the parking lot for one last time. He gave up and walked to his car.

“Dammit,” he cursed and kicked his tire. What was wrong with him? Why did he react towards her touch like that? He couldn’t help it…… It just didn’t feel right….

Jiwon gritted his teeth as he got into his car and sped home.


He slammed the door shut and entered the living room. Sunghoon was sitting on the couch, eating popcorn and watching TV.

Sunghoon glanced at Jiwon curiously. “What’s wrong hyung?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Jiwon mumbled and plopped on the opposite end of the couch.

“You can tell me…… I won’t tell anyone,” Sunghoon said.

Jiwon sighed, temporarily forgetting the awkwardness between them the night before.

“I had a bad date,” he said simply.

Sunghoon nodded sympathetically. “I see……. Too bad you didn’t tell me you were going to go out on a date, otherwise I could’ve given you some advice,” he said, popping a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

Jiwon looked at Sunghoon strangely. “YOU give ME advice?” he said and began to laugh.

“Don’t laugh…. I’m an expert with girls, you just don’t know…” Sunghoon said in a slightly annoyed tone.

Jiwon laughed even more. Sunghoon pouted and threw some popcorn at him.

“I’m telling you now though. Most likely, the reason why you had a bad date is because of YOU,” Sunghoon declared in a haughtly tone.

Jiwon stopped laughing. “You think it’s MY fault?” he asked, slightly irritated, even though Sunghoon was right.

“Yup!” Sunghoon said smirking.

“You don’t even know what happened tonight or even what kind of girl my date is,”

Jiwon said, raising his eyebrow.

“Ok, then why don’t you tell me what happened? Or better yet……. let’s re-enact it!”

Sunghoon suddenly said mischieviously.

“Ha! Ok, Mr. I’m-the-expert-on-women,” Jiwon agreed.

They sat on the couch, pretending to be in Jiwon’s car.

“Hey Jiyun,” Jiwon greeted.

“Hi Jiwon oppa~ My, you look so handsome tonight,” Sunghoon said, making his voice squeaky and high-pitched.

“She doesn’t say gay things like that,” Jiwon said. “She was very quiet in the car and at the movie theater,” he explained.

“Oh, okay.” Sunghoon said, he then flipped his hair, in a girly fashion. And Jiwon had to smile from seeing this. Sunghoon sure knew how to play his role well.

“Ok, now we’re at the thea…ter… So get up,” Jiwon ordered.

Sunghoon got up with Jiwon’s help and they began to slowly walk around the living room. Jiwon slipped his arm around Sunghoon’s waist.

“Oh~yah! Oppa~~ not here!” Sunghoon squealed, pushing Jiwon away.

Jiwon rolled his eyes. “She doesn’t act like that!” he said exasperated. “She liked it when I did that,” Jiwon said.

“Ok, ok.. Sorr-reee…..” Sunghoon muttered. Jiwon again, put his arm around his waist and they headed back towards the couch.

“Ok, then I said to her, “You want some popcorn or something to eat?” ” Jiwon said.

“I want popcorn Jiwon oppa! I’m so hungry,” Sunghoon said sweetly.

“HA. Sorry Sunghoon. She didn’t want anything to eat,” Jiwon replied and sat down on the couch.

“What kind of girl is she? Not wanting anything to eat,” Sunghoon grumbled and sat down next to him.

“Ok, let’s be serious,” he ordered. “Now, we’re watching the movie,” Jiwon explained.

Sunghoon nodded and stared intently at the TV screen.

“Then I put my arm around her and smelled her hair……..” Jiwon continued gently.

Jiwon slowly brought his arm around Sunghoon’s shoulder, drawing him closer to him.

And even without Jiwon’s saying so, Sunghoon remained stiff. Jiwon then leaned towards Sunghoon, smelling his hair. It smelled of Jiwon’s favorite shampoo. Very fresh and inviting…….

And just like his date, Jiwon then nuzzled Sunghoon’s neck, inhaling his boyish scent…..

He suddenly felt very dizzy……

“And then what happened……” Sunghoon asked softly.

“Then……..then I kissed her…….” Jiwon whispered. He couldn’t believe what he was

doing….. He brought his hand to Sunghoon’s face and slowly turned it towards him, their lips now inches apart.

Sunghoon closed the small space in between them and his soft lips were pressing against Jiwon’s……

Ch. 6

Jiwon, at first tried to back away, as much as he had the urge to kiss Sunghoon, he also didn’t want to….. But Sunghoon pushed Jiwon back, forcing him to lay on the couch now… still kissing him.

Sunghoon’s soft lips gently caressed Jiwon’s… making Jiwon relax some and eventually… he gave in… he allowed his mouth to open a bit…and Sunghoon took the opportunity to trace Jiwon’s lips with his tongue. Jiwon’s heart was racing…. his head feeling dizzy, his mind turning to mush…. Feeling Sunghoon’s entire body flat against his, brought him an unexplainable pleasure…. he felt himself growing harder by the second.

Sunghoon deepened their kiss, finally being able to taste him…. Jiwon felt himself responding to Sunghoon’s demanding kisses. A tiny moan of pleasure escaped from his throat…..

Jiwon tentatively raised his hands around Sunghoon, slightly hugging him, a bit unsure what to do….. Sunghoon broke off the kiss, out of breath, his face flushed with excitement. He closed his eyes and slowly moved his body against Jiwon’s, their organs brushing against one another through their clothes….

Jiwon gasped from the touch, which had aroused him even more…. Sunghoon continued to repeat this, each time pressing a little harder against him…. and a little faster……

Jiwon watched Sunghoon hovering above him, his eyes closed, his lips parted….and he could feel his warm breath on his cheek….

It was all so much for Jiwon to handle…. to control himself…. and then he couldn’t take it anymore… he exploded right there — letting himself go….

Sunghoon stopped moving and slowly opened his eyes, staring into Jiwon’s face.

Jiwon, embarassed, turned his head, looking away…….but Sunghoon moved his hand to Jiwon’s handsome face, forcing him to look at him.

Without saying a word, Sunghoon bent down and kissed his lips, very softly…. and this comforted Jiwon…….

“If your date was like *this*, how could it be bad?” Sunghoon murmered.

It didn’t turn out *this* way……” Jiwon whispered softly.

“Why not?” Sunghoon asked quietly.

“I……..I….” Jiwon couldn’t find the words.

“Didn’t like her…….” Sunghoon finished for him.

Jiwon slowly nodded as the two untangled themselves from each other, and sat upright on the couch.

“If you didn’t like her, then why’d you go out with her?” Sunghoon inquired.

“Because…….of you…” Jiwon blurted out. His face reddened from his outburst. He spoke without thinking. He had asked Jiyun on a date because he wanted to get

Sunghoon out of his mind…. he wished he had enough courage to tell Sunghoon this, but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything more.

Sunghoon studied Jiwon carefully. Even without saying anything else, he understood how Jiwon felt. He then slowly reached over, touching Jiwon’s hand.

His hands were so warm….so soft…., Jiwon thought.

The two watched the TV screen in front of them, in silence…. in thought….

Neither of their minds concentrating at the flickering monitor.



Jiwon groaned, if there was one thing he hated, it was the phone waking him up in the morning. He reached over and picked up the receiver.

“H’lo?” he said in an irritable voice.

“Jiwonah~ Wake up already! It’s 12:30,” replied cheerful Jiyong.

“Man Jiyong… I don’t care what freaking time it is — I need my sleep!” Jiwon said annoyed.

“Alright alright… Let me just ask you something real quick. What are your plans for tonight?” he asked pleasantly.

“I don’t know! It’s 12:30! I just got up….” Jiwon grumbled, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Well, then let’s go clubbing tonight! Drinks on me, k?” Jiyong said.

Jiwon’s ears perked up. Free drinks??

“Free drinks all night?” Jiwon asked.

“Sure, why not?” Jiyong said.

“Sunghoon’s coming too?,” Jiwon said abruptly, more than asking.

Jiyong paused, but only for a second.

“Sure, if he wants to,” he replied lightly. “So we are on for tonight then?”

“Definitely!” Jiwon declared, grinning.


Later in the evening….

“What do you mean you don’t want to go?” Jiwon demanded, his hands on his hips.

“I don’t feel like going,” Sunghoon replied, shrugging his shoulders.

Jiwon watched Sunghoon sitting prettily on his bed, reading a magazine.

“Did you hear what I said before? Jiyong’s buying tonight. The WHOLE NIGHT…” Jiwon said stressing the words ‘whole night’.

Sunghoon didn’t look up from his magazine.

“I don’t care,” he said in an uninterested tone.

Jiwon decided to take another approach. He knealt beside the bed so he could be at eye level with Sunghoon.

“C’mon Sunghoon, please? I’ll be fun… please??” Jiwon pleaded. “Pretty please??”

Sunghoon looked at him, a smile forming on his face. He liked to see Jiwon beg.

“Hmm…….” Sunghoon murmurmed, pretending to think about it.

“No,” he said smiling.

Jiwon narrowed his eyes.

“FINE,” he said shortly.

He walked over to the phone next to the bed and angrily punched in the numbers.

“Hello? Yeah…. I can’t go….. Why? Because Sunghoon doesn’t want to go…… I don’t know! Of course I did…… yeah, no, I can’t….. yeah, ok……. bye,” Jiwon said and hung up. He started to walk out of the room when Sunghoon got up from the bed and stopped him at the door.

Sunghoon slipped his arms around Jiwon from behind, hugging him.

“I won…..I won……” he sang softly. “You’re not mad at me, right?” Sunghoon asked.



Jiwon sighed and turned around to face Sunghoon.

“No, I’m not mad,” he said in a defeated tone.

“I know….” Sunghoon said, snuggling clsoer to him.

“What should we do instead?” Jiwon asked.

“What do you want to do?” Sunghoon shot back.

“I know……..” Jiwon said grinning mischieviously.

“What?” Sunghoon asked, looking at him curiously.

Jiwon then suddenly picked up Sunghoon and with all his strength, and threw him on the bed.


“You Jabroni!!!” Sunghoon shouted and they began a round of WWF.

Jiwon jumped on the bed and immediately caught Sunghoon in a headlock and began messing up his hair.

“Jiwon! Don’t touch my hair!!” yelled Sunghoon. He hated it when Jiwon did that.

Jiwon laughed and did it more. Sunghoon squirmed out of his grip, mad and then suddenly lunged forward, head-butting Jiwon in the stomach.

“Ung~~” Jiwon groaned in pain, clutching his stomach.

“Hah! That’s what you Jabronies get!” Sunghoon panted, out of breath. Jiwon didn’t respond, not moving.

“Jiwon? Are you……” Sunghoon peered down at h im, a look of concern growing on his face. He shook Jiwon gently. Still no movement.

“Jiwon!” Sunghoon cried, more urgently. He bent down near Jiwon’s face to check and see if he was breathing. Sunghoon stuck two fingers up Jiwon’s nose.

Jiwon snorted in response. “What the……!!!” Sunghoon laughed, clapping his hands.

“I knew it!! You were just faking being hurt! You ALWAYS do that….” Sunghoon exclaimed.

Jiwon wiped his nose. “Dang….. I thought you’d fall for it again like you always do,” he replied.

“I don’t ALWAYS fall for your tricks,” Sunghoon said huffily.

“Yeah you do,” Jiwon said.

“No I don’t!” Sunghoon nearly shouted and whacked Jiwon in the head with a nearby pillow.

“Oh…NOW you’re going to die!” Jiwon declared as they started to wrestle again.

Somehow Jiwon managed to pin Sunghoon down on the bed and Jiwon sat on Sunghoon’s stomach,while also holding Sunghoon’s arms down.

“Get off me!! You’re so heavy, I can’t breathe!” gasped Sunghoon.

“Good,” Jiwon said grinning.

Sunghoon wiggled and tried to be released from his grip, but it was useless. Jiwon overpowered him.

“Jiwon….if you let me go, I’ll give you something….” begged a purple Sunghoon.

“Something? What?” Jiwon asked, curious.

“Get off me, and I’ll give it to you,” Sunghoon pleaded, “I promise, it’s nothing bad….”

“Hm……okay….” Jiwon said, his curiousity getting the best of him. He swung his leg over and sat on the bed next to Sunghoon.

Sunghoon breathed in deeply, catching his breath.

“What is it? What are you going to give me??” Jiwon asked impatiently.

Sunghoon then leaned over and pecked him on the cheek.

Jiwon froze, caught off guard. Sunghoon then moved to his mouth, kissing him softly.

Jiwon closed his eyes, the familar feeling of the previous night when they first kissed resurfaced. Sunghoon laid down on the bed, pulling Jiwon’s shirt to pull Jiwon towards him. Their breaths had become ragged and Jiwon felt the urgency to be with



The shrill sound of the telephone shocked Jiwon. He tensed immediately, pulling away from Sunghoon, but Sunghoon held the back of Jiwon’s head with one hand, and with the other, he reached over and pushed the telephone, knocking it to the floor.

“Sunghoon……I should answer it…..” Jiwon said, out of breath from their kissing.

“No…..not now……” Sunghoon murmured, and then proceeded to leave light kisses on his neck, tasting his skin…..tasting him…..

Jiwon gave a small moan………


Jiyong gripped the phone tightly…..

His teeth were clenched, as he heard the two through his receiver……

He was breathing hard.

He couldn’t believe what was happening……

And right then, he decided Sunghoon was going to pay…….


Jiwon stared at his paper. The red ‘F’ at the top of the paper was what he was actually staring at. The other students chatted happily, comparing grades. Overall the entire class had gotten A’s and B’s because it had been an easy test. He was one of the only person that had failed. Jiwon hated his english class.

“Jiwon! How’d you do?” Jiyong called out, walking over to his desk.

Jiwon crumpled up his paper in response.

“That bad, huh?” Jiyong said sympathetically. Jiyong stuffed his paper in his pocket. He had gotten a perfect score on the test.

“I hate this class,” Jiwon muttered.

“It’s a pain,” agreed Jiyong, “Hey —” he started, but was cut off.

“Eun Jiwon!” the professor called out. “See me after class.”

Jiwon closed his eyes, sighing.

** after class **

“Your grades have been dropping steadily Jiwon. Why is that?” the professor asked sternly.

“I’m sorry professor. I should have studied more,” Jiwon said quietly. His head hung in shame.

The professor sighed. “Look, you’re a bright student — maybe just a little lazy at times….

So I’ll tell you what. How about I give you a chance to bring your grade up?” he offered.

Jiwon raised his head up, with a hopeful expression.

“You write a five page paper over what the test covered and turn it in tomorrow first thing in the morning and we’ll see how you do from there,” the professor said.

Jiwon smiled gratefully. “Thank you professor. You have NO idea how much I appreciate this,” he babbled.

The professor held his hand up. “Just do your best on this paper,” he said.


Soon as Jiwon got home, he carried the books he had checked out at the library and set them next to his computer. He immediately sat down, leafing through the pages, pulling out paper and jotting notes.

There was a soft tap at the door. Jiwon didn’t even hear it, he was too engrossed in his work.

Sunghoon quietly entered the room carrying a glass of juice.

“Jiwon hyung………” he greeted happily.

“Mmm?” Jiwon replied, not even looking up.

“I brought some juice for you!” Sunghoon announced, giving it to him.

“Oh, thanks.” Jiwon said, writing more things down. “Put it on the table over there,” he ordered.

“Are you going to even LOOK at me?” Sunghoon said pouting.

Jiwon finally looked up at him.

“That’s better,” Sunghoon said grinning.

“Look Sunghoon, I have to get this paper done by tomorrow, and I need to concentrate on this right now. So can you leave me alone?” he asked abruptly. He didn’t mean to sound so rude, but it just came out that way.

Sunghoon stood there for a minute, then spun around and stalked out of the room.

“Sunghoon –, ” Jiwon started, but the door slammed shut.

Jiwon sighed. He felt bad, but he needed to do this paper. He picked up his book and started to read again.

~~ Four hours later…… ~~

He yawned and stretched his arms. Jiwon was almost finished typing his paper. He just had one more paragraph to go. He felt really good that he worked so hard on it and when he re-read it, even he had to admit it was pretty good. He smiled cockily.

“I’m such a good writer,” he said to himself, admiring his work.

Suddenly he heard a rumbling sound coming from outside. Jiwon looked out the window. It had gotten dark quickly, and he realized it was going to rain soon. Paranoid,

Jiwon quickly saved his file into his computer.

He then heard another rumbling sound. This time coming from his stomach. Jiwon got up to go get something to eat from the kitchen.

“Mmmmm…Ramyun sounds good right now…” he said to himself. As he walked out, his eyes caught on the glass of juice, sitting on the table, untouched. A small wave of guilt washed over him. Sunghoon was probably still mad at him for being rude before. He decided to go make ammends.

Jiwon walked into Sunghoon’s room. Sunghoon was watching TV, while sprawled out on the bed.

“Hey,” Jiwon said, standing at the doorway.

Sunghoon stared at the TV.

“Sunghoon…. I’m sorry about before…”

No response.

“I’ll make it up to you~ I’ll make you some ramyun, how’s that?” Jiwon offered.

Sunghoon couldn’t hide his smile. “Okay! And make it really spicy,” he said.

Jiwon grinned back with relief. “You got it,” he said, and went to the kitchen to start making it.

– 15 minutes later –

Jiwon walked to Sunghoon’s room in an apron.

“Sunghoon, it’s all ready, let’s eat!” he said cheerfully.

But no one was in the room.

That’s strange, thought Jiwon. He checked the bathroom, the living room, the kitchen, but he wasn’t anywhere to be found.

Finally Jiwon went to his own room, and sure enough Sunghoon was in his room… the computer.

“Hey! Let’s eat, Hoonie,” Jiwon announced.

Sunghoon slowly turned around, his face pale.

And then Jiwon noticed something odd. The computer’s monitor was turned off.

“Why’d you turn off the computer?” Jiwon asked, slightly annoyed that he was messing with his stuff.

“Um….. Hyung……” Sunghoon said weakly.

“What? What’s wrong?” Jiwon asked sharply now. He felt himself growing worried.

“I….. I was on the internet….” Sunghoon began.

“And?” Jiwon asked, his jaw tightening.

“And…. I saw that you had mail… One of the emails said “I Love You,” on it and I opened it…..” he said in an inaudible voice.

Jiwon’s mind was racing. The realization then hit him. Sunghoon had downloaded the ‘I LOVE YOU’ virus….and now, his hard drive was erased, and his computer had shut down. His hands suddenly began to shake uncontrollably.

“Fuck Sunghoon! How could you be so stupid?! Now my fucking computer is jacked up~ and my paper…. Dammit!!!” Jiwon cursed angrily.

Sunghoon bit his lip, his chin quivering.

“Get the hell out of my room!” Jiwon yelled, furious.

Sunghoon slowly got up, a sorrowful look on his face.

“I’m s-s-sorry…..” he whispered, a single tear falling from his eyes.

“Yeah, you ARE sorry,” Jiwon snapped back. He walked over to the computer trying to reboot it. There was no response from it.

“Hyung….” Sunghoon said softly, and touched his shoulder.

Jiwon whirled around and suddenly shoved Sunghoon, knocking him to the floor.

Sunghoon, shocked, looked up at Jiwon. His sad expression then turned to anger… to almost a look of hate……

Immediately, Jiwon knew he had gotten out of control.

“Sunghoon…. I’m sorry,” Jiwon said, but Sunghoon quickly got up, and ran out of the room.

Jiwon ran after him, but Sunghoon somehow had gotten his shoes on quickly and he was out the door. Jiwon kept up with him, barefoot, almost reaching him. They were outside now, tiny raindrops starting to fall. Right when Jiwon was about to grab Sunghoon’s arm, he suddenly lost his balance and tripped over a crack in the ground.

He landed on the damp concrete with a dull thud. His face hit the ground and he could feel the sharp sting of the scratch across his cheek.

But as he watched Sunghoon’s figure disappear, it felt like nothing compared to the pain he was feeling in his heart……

Ch. 8

Jiwon slumped in his chair.

“Ah-joh-mah! Bring me one more bottle of soju,” he called out, slurring his words. It was raining steadily now, the evening turning colder, but Jiwon was warm and drunk in a nearby poh jang mah cha. The ah joh mah brought another bottle to him, adding to the other two empty ones already on the table. She was about to say something, but decided not to. After all, business was business.

Jiwon immediately grabbed the new bottle and began pouring the clear liquid into his shot glass. His hand was unsteady, and he couldn’t quite think straight…. He slowly picked up the glass and downed it in one shot, feeling the slight burn on his throat.

His mind was fuzzy. He stared dumbly at his hands. And suddenly it was like his hand was the most intriguing spectacle he had ever seen. He looked at it in amazement, moving his fingers.

“Whoa….” he mumbled to himself.

Suddenly, there was a brillant flash of lightening which was then followed by a loud clap of thunder.


“Scuse me…” Jiwon mumbled. The thunder had surprised him.

Suddenly two shrieking girls made their way into the tent, scared silly from the thunder.

They laughed hysterically as they put their soaked umbrellas on the floor and grabbed a table.

“Ah-joh-mah~~ Can we get some duk-bok-kee?” One girl asked loudly. The other girl then added, “Yeah, and some soju too….”

Jiwon’s ears perked up. That voice sounded familar. Jiwon tore his eyes away from his hand and saw himself ten feet away from…. Jiyun…

“Hey Jiyun!” Jiwon called out, waving his hand wildly.

Jiyun slowly turned and looked over in his direction in surprise.

“How YOU doin’?” Jiwon slurred, grinning.

Her look of surprise turned into a look of disgust. Her friend rolled her eyes as Jiyun turned away, ignoring him.

“What? Did I do something? Why the cold shoulder?” Jiwon asked, scratching his head in confusion.

“Shut the hell up Jiwon!” snapped Jiyun’s friend. Jiyun shook her head, signaling to her to just ignore him, but her friend refused.

“You have alot of nerve!” her friend continued, her eyes flashing angrily.

Jiwon rubbed his eyes, thinking. And then it hit him. He remembered why Jiyun hated him.

“Oops…” he said in an inaudiable voice.

Silence passed between them. Finally Jiwon spoke up.

“If it means anything now, I’m sorry Jiyun…..” he said softly, looking down at the floor. “I can explain……Do you think we can….. can talk?” he asked quietly.

Jiyun’s friend snorted rudely. “Look, I think it’s kind of late for apologies and your lame excuses, don’t you?” she shot back. “Let’s go Jiyun — he’s annoying the hell out of me,” she said as she got up and gathered her things.

But Jiyun remained sitting.

“Jiyun! Let’s go~ We’ll find someplace else to eat,” her friend urged her.

Then to Jiwon’s surprise, Jiyun shook her head.

“You go ahead, I’ll see you tomorrow….” she said softly.

Her friend stood there staring at her for a minute in disbelief. Finally she sighed heavily and left.

Now the two of them were alone.

Jiyun went over and sat next to Jiwon. They sat in an awkward silence.

“Um…I’m just waiting for you to start…” she finally said.

“Oh. Oh, right,” Jiwon replied back, a little flustered.

“The reason why…. Uh…” he started.

Jiyun nodded, encouraging him to go on.

“You see…. I ….” he stammered.

“Spit it out Jiwon,” she said.

He took a deep breath.

“I was in love with someone else,” he blurted out. “Uh…I guess I still am…”

“The second time when we went out… I just used…you….and I’m sorry…. I wanted to get him off my mind and so I asked you out that day. I know I’m a jerk, but I’m really sorry….” Jiwon babbled.

Jiyun just stared at him.

“Him?” she asked.

Jiwon froze. He hadn’t meant to tell her he was in love with another guy. He silently cursed himself. He wanted to deny it, say something to cover it up, but nothing came out of his mouth.

“I don’t believe this….” she muttered. One of the most eligible guys at her school was in love with a guy?

Jiwon picked up his bottle of soju and began chugging it down. She watched him in shock as he downed the whole bottle.

“What’s wrong with me J’yun….” he asked in an unsteady voice.

After some time, Jiyun finally responded.

“It….It’s okay Jiwon….Nothing’s wrong with you…. You just found someone to love, that’s all..” she said softly. As hard as it was to believe what Jiwon had just said, she actually felt better. He wasn’t such an asshole after all…..

“Why don’t you go home Jiwon…. ” she suggested. “I think you’ve had enough to drink,”

Jiwon nodded.

“Thanks for understanding,” he said quietly.

Jiyun smiled at him.


Sunghoon trudged along the street, he was drenched from the pouring rain. He shivered slightly and wrapped his arms tightly around his body, trying to keep himself warm.

He still couldn’t believe that Jiwon could hurt him like that. He never thought Jiwon would ever hurt him…. but he did today…. Sunghoon sighed. As upset as he was that

Jiwon had hurt him, it was so cold outside in the rain! Sunghoon decided that he would make Jiwon grovel and beg for forgiveness and then, and AFTER he had suffered enough, he would forgive him and things could go back to normal. He turned around and started to head back home.


Jiwon entered the room. He still felt kind of woozy after all that soju, but he wanted to see Sunghoon before he went to bed. The room was pitch black. He flicked on the light switch, but there was still no light. He then realized the electricity was totally out due to the thunderstorm…. Jiwon could only hear Sunghoon’s steady breathing. He was already asleep…..

Jiwon approached the bed carefully…. He felt like he was blind because he couldn’t see a thing, but he somehow made his way over and kneeled down next to the bed. His hand slowly searched for Sunghoon’s hand and he found it. It was warm and soft….

He raised Sunghoon’s hand to his cheek, loving the way it felt against his skin.

“I’m sorry Sunghoon……” he whispered and then he kissed Sunghoon’s palm tenderly.

Then Sunghoon’s fingers tightened around Jiwon’s hand and began to pull him forward….

Jiwon slowly got on the bed on his hands and knees, making his way closer to Sunghoon’s body.

Sunghoon’s arms wrapped around Jiwon’s neck, hugging him, very tightly… still not saying a word. But Jiwon knew that everything would be alright….

Sunghoon’s breathing was already uneven as Jiwon kissed his cheek gently. Their lips finally met, a feeling of warmth spreading all over Jiwon’s body. Their kisses deepened and Jiwon could sense a type of urgency within Sunghoon….

Jiwon was surprised when Sunghoon started pulling at Jiwon’s shirt. They had never gone quite so far this far….. Jiwon’s heart was pounding as he took off his shirt and could hear Sunghoon doing the same.

He was going to actually do this…..


Jiwon took a deep breath. His heart was pounding in his ears. His blood was pumping as he bent over and kissed him, an earnest, hungry kiss… He became even more excited when Sunghoon responded back with an equal amount of passion….

Jiwon whispered in between kisses, “I love you Hoonie….. and this is just…. just the beginning for us….”

He traced Sunghoon’s chest lightly with his fingers, feeling his nipples grow hard as tiny pebbles each time he rubbed against them with his palms. His hands made their way to the lower part of Sunghoon’s taut stomach and stopped at the band of his boxers. At first Jiwon was hesitant to continue, but Sunghoon’s hand closed over his, helping him slip off the remainder of his clothing until Sunghoon was completely naked and at the mercy of Jiwon….

Jiwon touched Sunghoon’s errrection lightly… He had never touched another man’s penis before and to him, it was one of the most errotic things that he had ever experienced…. He relished the moment as he stroked Sunghoon lovingly, enjoying how Sunghoon’s errection hardened and throbbed more at every touch. Jiwon finally closed his hands over Sunghoon’s penis and he heard Sunghoon gasp sharply from pleasure.

He felt Sunghoon’s hips suddenly quiver and then began thrusting himself in Jiwon’s hands….

Jiwon was panting now, squeezing Sunghoon to the pattern of his thrusts. The thrusts became more urgent, quicker and Jiwon knew Sunghoon was about to come so without thinking, Jiwon enveloped him in his hot mouth.

Sunghoon groaned loudly now… it sounded so odd… yet all Jiwon could think about was giving him pleaure…

His tongue met with the tip of Sunghoon’s rigid penis and he tasted Sunghoon in the most intimate way… He began sucking him, in and out, the breath from his nostrils tickling Sunghoon…. Jiwon sucked harder as Sunghoon moved in and out of his mouth until Sunghoon finally couldn’t stop himself adn climaxed , exploding in Jiwon’s welcoming mouth….

Jiwon drank in the warm semen, but refused to stop. He immediately climbed on top of

Sunghoon and kissed him.

“Taste it….” he said huskily. “You tasted so good….”

Sunghoon twisted his face away, but Jiwon forced his mouth open and kissed him hard.

Sunghoon finally returned the demanding kiss, their tongues touching pushing against one another… Jiwon lay on top of him, their legs entangled with each others when he suddenly became aware of something…..

Sunghoon’s legs were longer than his… but that was impossible….

Jiwon was taller than Sunghoon.

He broke the kiss and looked down at the person below him. It was too dark to make out anything.

“Sunghoon?” Jiwon whispered hoarsely.


“Sunghoon???” He asked again, panic rising within him.

“No…. Jiyong….” was the quiet reply.

Jiwon felt sick to his stomach.

He was sweating now.

God… this isn’t happening….., Jiwon thought wildly.

“Surprise Jiwon…..” murmured Jiyong.

A choked cry rose within Jiwon and he backed away from Jiyong, losing his balance and falling off the bed. He landed on the floor with a thud, but scrambled to get back up.

His head was spinning… He felt like throwing up.

“Do you know how much I love you Jiwon?” Jiyong asked.

Hearing these words, Jiwon stumbled through the room, a feeling of deep disgust rising within him. He somehow made it to the bathroom, feeling his way for the toilet. Then

Jiwon threw up.

Jiyong got up from the bed and wobbled over to the bathroom. He could hear Jiwon’s retching…. Jiyong bent down and patted Jiwon on the back. Then to his surprise, Jiwon shoved him away.

“Get the hell away from me –” Jiwon said through his gasps, before throwing up again.

Those words were like a knife in Jiyong’s heart. Jiwon was disgusted with him? He felt an unbearable sense of rejection…..And now, suddenly, Jiyong just wanted to get out of there.

He searched for his clothes and quickly put them on. He found the door and hurriedly walked out….


Sunghoon walked quickly, turning towards the house now… He was almost there. He shivered, picking up his pace…. The rain had not stopped yet….

And then he saw a tall figure leaving the house….he knew immediately who it was… Their eyes met and locked with one another as Jiyong neared Sunghoon.

“What are you doing here?” Sunghoon asked suspiciously.

Jiyong’s feeling of rejection immediately turned to revenge. “Wouldn’t you like to know…..” he said, smirking.

Sunghoon noticed how rumpled Jiyong’s clothes were and his hair was also messed up, besides the factor of rain contributing to it. But Sunghoon decided to ignore him and started up to the house and walked past him.

“Never knew Jiwon could be such a great fuck,” Jiyong called out after Sunghoon.

Sunghoon froze. He couldn’t breathe. What did he just say?

“Yeah, you heard me right Hoonie~” Jiyong jeered cruelly. “We just got pretty intimate, if you know what I mean… hahaha….” he said, snickering.

Sunghoon felt his face grow hot.

“Liar —” Sunghoon started to say, but Jiyong just smiled cattily at him.

“Fine, don’t believe it if you don’t want to…. but you know what? He sure does know how to suck~” Jiyong said casually and turned around and walked away, whistling.

Sunghoon felt his knees go weak. Was this really happening? Something in Jiyong’s tone made Sunghoon believe him…. and then he ran into the house.


Sunghoon walked into the dark room, out of breath. He could hear some noises coming from the bathroom, but he was too afraid to go in there…. He surveyed the room, but it was still too dark to see anything when suddenly as if on cue, the lights in the room flashed back on. The electricity was back.

And that’s when Sunghoon saw the rumpled bed sheets and several wet patches on the bed…..

He couldn’t stand to see anymore and ran out of the house….


Jiwon groggily came home from school. He had just begged his professor to give him another extension on his paper and out of the goodness of his heart, the professor agreed. Jiwon still had other classes to go to, but he told his teachers that he was ill and he just came home.

The truth was, he was worried about Sunghoon. Sunghoon hadn’t come home that night and Jiwon was going out of his mind as to where he was….

When Jiwon thought about what happened last night, he felt so nauseated and sick.

Realizing it was Jiyong that he had…. done *that* with, was….. well, it just made him feel sick….

Jiwon crawled onto his bed, exhausted…. He was going to stay at home until Sunghoon came back…. and then he eventually fell asleep.


Sunghoon finally returned home in the late evening. He had been thinking what he should do about this all night and day, wandering the streets like a crazy man. A seed of doubt still was in him and so Sunghoon decided to come back and confront Jiwon. He barged into the room where Jiwon awoke from the noise.

“Sunghoon! Where were you??” Jiwon asked with a concerned look when he entered the room, but Sunghoon ignored his question.

“You fucked him?” Sunghoon demanded furiously.

Jiwon felt dizzy again from just thinking about it.

“Sunghoon, no — we didn’t….. I didn’t know…..I…. I thought it was….you…” Jiwon said weakly.

“We did something…. but not *that*…. Hoonie…I’m so sorry…” Jiwon said trying to explain. He was feeling sick again. He tried to get up from the bed.

“Stay on the bed,” Sunghoon said sharply, but a feeling of relief spread through him. But he didn’t show it.

Jiwon obeyed, a bit confused as Sunghoon approached the bed. Sunghoon stared down at him, breathing hard from anger. He reached over and held Jiwon’s jaw roughly… Jiwon felt scared, not knowing what to expect….. and then Sunghoon leaned over and kissed him long and hard.

He forced Jiwon’s mouth open, invading him, demanding him to respond…. Jiwon felt his body immediately ignite, a new sense of energy rushing throughout him…. They were already out of breath as Sunghoon broke off the kiss and took off his shirt and joined Jiwon in bed….

Sunghoon tugged at Jiwon’s shorts, revealing Jiwon’s errection to both of them…. Jiwon blushed, but Sunghoon didn’t notice and also took off the remainder of his clothes….

Sunghoon then positioned himself so that he was above Jiwon’s warm body….

Jiwon’s heart hammered in his chest as Sunghoon spread his legs apart. “This is how I do it…. Just so you know for future reference….” Sunghoon said breathlessly.

Sunghoon settled between Jiwon’s legs, holding himself stiff armed above him.

“Put your legs around me… and raise your hips just a little,” Sunghoon instructed.

Jiwon did as he was told, embracing Sunghoon’s waist, he tilted his hips and shut his eyes tightly…

“Look at me,” Sunghoon whispered.

“We need each other and no one else…..We belong together…..”

Jiwon opened his eyes and stared deeply into Sunghoon’s… They stared at one another with a deep intensity…Without saying it, the two could feel each other’s strong love for one another….

And then Jiwon felt a pressure, hard and insistent, where he had never been touched before….

Sunghoon pushed in a little, just a nudge, but Jiwon felt as if he’d been opened wide…

Sunghoon presssed in even more – and Jiwon felt Sunghoon’s length… it was incredibly thick and so he shifted his body to accommodate Sunghoon even more….

Inch by inch Sunghoon filled him, until his entire length was finally in. Jiwon could feel

Sunghoon’s body rigid and tense…. From time to time Sunghoon paused to let Jiwon’s snug passage accept him and gave him time to relax….

Then Sunghoon lowered himself to kiss Jiwon softly, as if a small warning for what was yet to come….

Sunghoon slowly withdrew himself and then sank back in with one smooth thrust and

Jiwon lifted his hips to meet him…. They did this again, and again as Sunghoon stroked him within, grinding his hips against Jiwon’s when they came together….

Jiwon’s legs tightened around Sunghoon’s waist and pulled him down, holding him close as they rocked together…. faster and faster…. They could hear other gasping for air together with their frantic thrusts, their bodies now slick with sweat….

Their pace quickened, the thrusts more urgent and then Sunghoon finally rammed his

body fiercely into Jiwon’s and it was all Jiwon could take…..Jiwon felt himself come, exploding all over Sunghoon’s stomach, the warm semen spilling over their naked bodies….

Jiwon panted from exhaustion, but Sunghoon was still throbbing and hard inside him….

Sunghoon grabbed Jiwon’s buttocks, digging his fingernails into them and squeezed

Jiwon’s cheeks together until he too finally came, shuddering frantically over Jiwon’s body…

Sunghoon breathed heavily as he laid down on top of Jiwon…. Their bodies were still united, but satisfied. Jiwon slowly put his arms around Sunghoon and held him close….

They stayed in this intimate embrace and fell asleep…. For now, they were content and as the sun broke out starting a new day, it seemed like a new beginning for them…..


He hated Sunghoon.

He hated him with such a passion. But his pain of rejection filled his heart up even more than the hate.

Jiyong sat in his car alone, and he felt his hot tears trickling down his face when he remembered how much he loved the feeling of their bodies together the other night…. but that would never happen again.

And he couldn’t bear to see *them* together anymore…..

He was feeling faint now.

Very light-headed.

He looked down at the blood running out from his wrists….. Jiyong then closed his eyes for the last time.


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